                                                               1.



                                                        FADE IN:


1   INT. WALSH HOME - DAY                                           1

    CREDITS OVER VARIOUS CLOSE-UPS of the goonies' HANDS and
    FACES as they perform the secret goony handshake. It is a
    very poetic, beautifully synchronized series of movements
    which displays a sense of kinship and brotherhood. We hear
    the VOICE OF MIKEY, reciting the GOONY OATH, over these
    images.

                      MIKEY (V.O.)
            ”1 will never betray my goon dock
            friends, We will stick together
            until the whole words ends, Through
            heaven and hell, and nuclear war,
            Good pals like us will stick like
            tar, In the city, or the country,
            or the forest, or boonies, I am
            proudly declared, one of the
            goonies!"

                                                  FADE TO BLACK:


2   INT. JAIL - CELL BLOCK - DAY                                    2

    FADE IN: CLOSE-UP.

    The leathery, bullish face of a JAIL GUARD. He SHOUTS.

                      GUARD
            Feed time!

    CAMERA PULLS BACK.

    The guard stands in a dimly lit prison HALLWAY. Rows of
    JAIL CELLS stretch along the side walls. Crowded-with
    PRISONERS. The prisoners SHOUT and JEER at the guard. He
    removes his wooden BILLY CLUB. Giving a HARD RAP to the
    bars. It ECHOES through the prison. The guard SNARLS.

                      GUARD
            The longer you animals bark -- the
            colder yer' lunch gets.

    The prisoners SIMMER DOWN. The guard inserts a key into the
    MASTER LOCK. All of the cell doors OPEN. SIMULTANEOUSLY.
    The prisoners RUSH OUT. HUNGRY. The guard SHOUTS.

                         GUARD
                                                                2.


            Single file. Single file.

    The prisoners crowd into a LINE. They PASS the watchful
    guard, who taps his palm.with the threatening billy club.

    Two ASSISTANT GUARDS lead the prisoners into another
    hallway. Toward the CAFETERIA. When all of the prisoners
    have exited, the guard turns to FOLLOW. He PAUSES. Hearing
    a NOISE. A CREAKING. The guard TURNS. He sees SOMETHING. At
    hallway's END. In the LAST cell. A DARK FIGURE. SWINGING
    back and forth. The guard WALKS to the cell. CURIOUS.
    CAUTIOUS. Hand GRIPPING his gun. He STOPS. Outside of the
    OPEN cell door. He PEERS inside. He is met with a SHOCKING
    SIGHT.


3   INT. JAKE'S - CELL - DAY                                         3

    The body of JAKE FRATELLI, a 33 year old excitable boy,
    strong, muscular, with the face of a KILLER. JAKE is James
    Caan on speed. He HANGS from a rusty ceiling pipe. His belt
    is wrapped AROUND HIS NECK. His eyes are CLOSED. His tongue
    HANGS OUT. Face frozen in a GHASTLY position. His body
    SWAYS. An obvious SUICIDE. A NOTE is pinned to Jake's
    chest. The guard ENTERS the cell. He GRABS the note.
    READING it to'himself.

                      GUARD
            "You schmuck! You really think I'd
            be stupid enough to kill myself?"
                 (puzzled)
            Huh?

    The guard LOOKS UP. Jake's eyes are OPEN. He is SMILING.
    VERY ALIVE. Before the guard can react, Jake quickly lifts
    his KNEE. SLAM! Into the guard's JAW. The guard HITS the
    floor. OUT COLD. Jake BOOSTS himself out of the noose. We
    see that the noose is actually attached to a CONTRAPTION
    that fits around Jake's WAIST. Jake LOOKS into the hallway.
    Making sure the coast is CLEAR. He begins to UNBUTTON the
    guard's shirt.

                                                        CUT TO:


4   EXT. JAIL - DAY                                                  4

    Jake RUNS from the jail. A blaring ALARM sounds! A GROUP OF
    GUARDS run out of the prison, in PURSUIT of Jake. CAMERA
    PANS TO a waiting BLACK, nondescript, OFF ROAD VEHICLE.
                                                                3.


    Leaning out the window of the driver's side, puffing on a
    cigarette, is MAMA FRATELLI. She is a 56 year old, heavyset
    woman, with grey hair and a MENACING, EVIL face. She is
    part Marjorie Main, part Jungle cat. Her son, FRANCIS
    FRATELLI, stands outside of the car, holding a can of
    GASOLINE. Francis is a 31 year old man with dark hair and
    crazed eyes. He resembles Victor Jory as Injun Joe in the
    1938 film "Tom Sawyer". He has just poured a STREAM of
    gasoline several feet in front of the OFF ROAD VEHICLE. The
    cops have nearly CAUGHT UP with Jake. Guns DRAWN, they are
    ready to SHOOT! Mama nonchalantly FLICKS her lit cigarette
    to the ground. The cigarette IGNITES THE GASOLINE. This
    creates a literal WALL OF FIRE between the cops and JAKE.
    Jake and Francis HOP into the car. The Off Road Vehicle
    DRIVES OFF.


5   INT. O.R.V. - DAY                                                5

    Mama DRIVES. PANICKED. UPSET. She CHECKS the rearview
    mirror. A second police car joins the chase. The Police are
    GAINING on them.


6   EXT. EIGHTH STREET - DAY                                         6

    THE POLICE CARS FOLLOW. IN HOT PURSUIT down the steep hill.

    THE O.R.V.

    takes a SHORT CUT, through a STOP N' SNACK PARKING LOT. The
    O.R.V. nearly HITS a Mexican woman, ROSALITA. She is ASKING
    DIRECTIONS from the store owner, an elderly woman named
    SYLVIA KEESTER. Rosalita watches in SHOCK as the two police
    cars shoot past her. In PURSUIT of the O.R.V.


7   EXT. HOUSE WITH BAD PLUMBING - DAY                               7

    The CHASE continues through A RESIDENTIAL SECTION of town.
    CAMERA PANS TO ONE PARTICULAR HOUSE, SEVERAL FEET AWAY. We
    DOLLY INTO THE KITCHEN WINDOW.


8   INT. KITCHEN WITH BAD PLUMBING - DAY                             8

    MOUTH sits on the kitchen sink, watching an old BLACK and
    WHITE MOVIE on T.V. Several cop cars CHASE James Cagney’s
    car, complete with POLICE SIRENS and FLYING BULLETS.
    Mouth's Father, THE PLUMBER, works on the pipes below. WE
    SEE THE ONCOMING CHASE through the kitchen window. But
    Mouth is TRANSFIXED by the television screen. Mouth's
    FATHER screams.
                                                                4.


                       FATHER
             Turn down that goddamn T.V. and
             come help me with these pipes!

     Mouth TRIES to turn down the T.V. but the volume just seems
     to get LOUDER and LOUDER, as the real chase blazes past the
     window over Mouth's shoulder, all of it UNSEEN by Mouth.
     SECONDS before the chase passes the kitchen window, Mouth's
     Father hits the WRONG PIPE. A GUSH OF WATER blasts through
     the sink drain. It DOUSES Mouth and SPLATTERS the window.
     This creates a CURTAIN OF WATER that BLOCKS Mouth's VIEW of
     the chase.


9    EXT. JUNKYARD - DAY                                             9

     DATA searches through an enormous trash bin, picking up
     discarded WIRES, CABLES, etc. Data is wearing a WALKMAN. It
     DROWNS out all sounds. He is tinkering with one of his
     crude inventions, A BELT BUCKLE SUCTION GUN. Data DECIDES
     to test his invention. He STEPS away from the trash bin. He
     PRESSES a button on his BELT that reads "OUT"!

     The BELT BUCKLE flips open. A suction cup, attached to a
     long wire, SHOOTS OUT of the buckle. The suction cup STICKS
     to the trash bin! Data HITS the "IN” button on his belt.

     Another mechanism causes the wire to REEL the trash bin
     TOWARD DATA!

     Data TRIES to turn it OFF! Doesn't work!

     Suddenly, the trash bin comes to a STOP!

     Wedged between TWO TELEPHONE POLES! The strong FORCE of the
     WIRE begins to PULL DATA INTO THE BIN! He CAN’T STOP IT!
     Data PULLED inside the bin, an instant before the CHASE
     PASSES BY!


10   INT. O.R.V. - DAY                                               10

     The SPEEDOMETER wavers past 100 mph. Mama GLANCES to the
     rearview. The cops are still GAINING. Mama takes a SHARP
     TURN. OUT of the junkyard.

     THE CHASE CONTINUES. Moving along the MAIN ROAD.


11   INT. O.R.V. - DAY                                               11
                                                                5.


     Mama is FRENZIED. Wanting to LOSE THE COPS. She makes a
     QUICK TURN. OFF of the main road. Through the grassy field
     of a high school football field.


12   EXT. HIGH SCHOOL FOOTBALL FIELD - DAY                           12

     TINA TURNER’S "Better Be Good To Me” BLASTS from the
     stadium speakers. A group* of high school CHEERLEADERS
     practice along with the music. ANDY, one of the prettiest-
     girls in town, LEADS the cheerleaders. They are forming a
     PYRAMID. The chase PASSES BY in the background, UNBEKNOWNST
     to the CHEERLEADERS. The MUSIC IS TOO LOUD for them to
     hear.

     THE O.R.V. LEAPS a small ditch, out of the parking lot,
     through a wire fence.


13   EXT. STREET - DAY                                               13

     The Fratelli O.R.V. squeals down the street, rapidly
     overtaking:

     A LARGE VAN. The elderly СAB OCCUPANTS (SIMON & SIMONE
     SIMIAN) exchange a contented glance. Simon now looks at his
     side view mirror, his expression instantly changing to
     panic as:

                       SIMONE
             Simon, look out!

     The van swerves hard right, allowing the Fratelli O.R.V. to
     screech around it. Now suddenly looming up from behind the
     right side: A POLICE PATROL CAR!

     Simon swings the large van back hard left to accommodate
     the patrol car as:

     A SECOND PATROL CAR starts to overtake the van from the
     left side! The van spins in confusion, blocking the road
     sideways as A THIRD PATROL CAR skids to a stop in front of
     it, barely avoiding a crash.

     The OFFICER inside jumps out, heads quickly for the van
     cab.

                       OFFICER
             This road only runs two ways, pop,
             so --
                                                                6.


     He suddenly stops as he hears FRANTIC POUNDING and AGONIZED
     SCREAMS from within the rear of the van! Rushing to the
     side door, the Officer starts to jerk it open as:

                       SIMON
             No! Don’t! Wait!!!

     Too late! The door flies open and TWO HUGE GORILLAS leap
     out, decking the Officer in the process. Grunting and
     squealing with delight at their new-found freedom, they
     disappear around the corner of the van.

     ANGLE ON FAR SIDE OF VAN

     The dazed Officer rounds the van in pursuit, scratches his
     gead, puzzled. The Gorillas have disappeared. In b.g. we
     now see, printed on the side of the van: BONZO THE GREAT
     AND HIS MATE, with a picture of them driving a small red
     car.


14   EХТ. PUTTING GREEN & GOLF CLUB - DAY                            14

     A neatly manicured putting green, part of an elegant
     country club.

     TROY PREKINS and his FATHER stand on the green. In b.g. a
     little red golf cart sits, holding their clubs. Troy hovers
     seriously over a putt, using the knock-kneed stance made
     famous by Arnold Palmer.

                       TROY
             How's this, daddy?

                       MR. PERKINS
             Don’t lock your knees when you
             putt, son. Makes you look .like you
             have to go to the bathroom. Here.
             Watch me --

     ANGLE ON BUSHES

     The two Gorillas emerge from the bushes, now catching sight
     of the red golf cart. Eyes dancing with delight, they
     circle it curiously, then hop in as:

     BACK TO GREEN

     Troy has heard something, wheels in time to see the
     Gorillas take off in the cart! His jaw drops in disbelief.

                       TROY
                                                               7.


             Daddy -- daddy. Two huge hairy
             things just stole our cart!

     Mr. Perkins spins around. The cart with the Gorillas is
     disappearing into the distance. He squints after it,
     enraged.

                       MR. PERKINS
             Hairy things, my ass! That's George
             and Ethel Higgenbottom! I'd
             recognize them anywhere!
                  (yelling)
             I see you, Higgenbottom! This could
             mean your membership, you furball!


15   EXT. TOWN STREET - DAY                                         15

     THE HIGH SPEED CHASE! The two police cars still follow the
     OEF ROAD VEHICLE! IT CONTINUES through what is normally a
     very PEACEFUL, COASTAL TOWN.


16   EXT. MARINA - DAY                                              16

     The cars are headed for a MARINA. Several FISHING BOATS are
     docked here. STEF, a 16 year old girl, WORKS with her
     Father on a small FISHING BOAT. Seconds before the CHASE
     passes, Stef, wearing a mask and snorkel, ducks her head
     into a tank of water, sorting lobsters and crabs. As the
     chase PASSES out of sight, Stef RESURFACES. She's MISSED
     all of it.


17   INT. VIDEO PARLOR - DAY                                        17

     CHUNK stands in the window. He is PLAYING a video game,
     alternating between bits of a giant PIZZA SLICE and a
     chocolate MILKSHAKE. The REFLECTION of the chase is VISIBLE
     in the video game window. Chunk TURNS from the window,
     clumsily SPILLING the milkshake over his shirt and SMEARING
     the window with pizza. Chunk STARES at the chase. He sees
     the countless BULLETHOLES in the O.R.V. THE POLICE CARS
     follow. Chunk’s eyes are WIDE. STARTLED by the exciting
     chase. He’s the only GOONY who's seen it.


18   EXT. STREET - NEAR O.R.V. RACE START - DAY                     18

     Mama CHECKS the rear view mirror, seeing the police closing
     in. The boys LOOK at her in horror.

                         JAKE
                                                                 8.


                We’ve had it, Ma.

     But Mama has NOT LOST her confidence. There is a certain
     GLEAM in her eyes, as if she'’KNOWS something. She TURNS to
     her sons.

                          MAMA
                Duck down, boys!

     The boys OBEY Mama. Mama REACHES below the seat and removes
     a HELMET. She puts the helmet over her head and pulls down
     the DARK face visor.

     THE R.V.

     makes a sudden TURN. The Police try to FOLLOW. Mama turns
     onto the town's MAIN STREET, where a crowd of people have
     gathered to view THE CAULDRON POINT O.R.V. RACE.


19   EXT. O.R.V. RACE STARTING POINT - DAY                            19

     Forty NONDESCRIPT OFF-ROAD VEHICLES line up at the starting
     line. All of their drivers wear HELMETS, their dark face
     visors PULLED DOWN.

     MAMA’S O.R.V. drives up to the STARTING LINE and JOINS THE
     RACE. The STARTING FLAG is waved. The RACE BEGINS. THE
     POLICE CARS stop at the starting line. The POLICEMEN•get
     out. Guns RAISED. Ready to SHOOT. But as the countless
     vehicles pass, the Policemen can only STARE IN CONFUSION.

     Mama’s O.R.V. is LOST in the crowd of similar vehicles. Her
     face is HIDDEN in the crowd of similar face helmets. The
     race DISAPPEARS over a hill.

                                                    DISSOLVE TO:


20   EXT. O.R.V. RACE STREET - DAY                                    20

     Ridden with bullet holes, Mama’s O.R.V. turns away from the
     race, taking an ALTERNATE ROUTE.


21   INT. O.R.V.                                                      21

     Mama removes her HELMET. She and the boys are LAUGHING.
     They have LOST the cops. They are FREE.


22   EXT. STREET BY WALSH HOUSE - DAY                                 22
                                                                 9.


     CAMERA STAYS with the O.R.V., as it cruises through the
     "GOON DOCKS". A small VILLAGE, located in and around the
     docks. Made up of HOMES and SMALL SHOPS. Several FISHERMAN
     and BLUE COLLAR WORKERS live here.

     As the O.R.V. drives out of town, the CAMERA PANS TO --


23   EXT. WALSH HOME - DAY                                            23

     A 3 STORY house. SIMPLE. PLAIN. This home is in slightly
     better condition than the others in the Goon Docks. CAMERA
     DOLLIES into the home’s picture window. A 13 year old boy
     STARES out the window. MIKEY WALSH. He has obviously JUST
     MISSED the chase. He gives an ANGRY, BORED shrug.

                       MIKEY
             Nuthin' exciting ever happens
             around here anyway!


24   INT. WALSH HOME - RECREATION ROOM                                24

     Mikey is a 13 year old HYPOCHONDRIAC. CUTE. A wiry, SKINNY
     body. SHORT for his age. BRACES. SHAGGY brown hair. A
     "BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN” concert T-shirt. FADED Levis. VELCRO
     sneakers. Mikey is in that AWKWARD stage of adolescence.

     His entire body is going through a CHANGE. Mikey gives
     himself a SHOT OF PROMOTENE MIST. Angrily STARING out the
     window.

                       MIKEY
             Who needs the goon docks! Who needs
             this house! I can't wait to get
             outta’ here!

                       BRAND (O.S.)
             Really?

     Mikey TURNS from the window. His brother, BRAND, hangs
     UPSIDE DOWN from a chinning bar. In the BACKGROUND. He is
     attached to the bar by METAL ANKLETS. Brand looks NOTHING
     like Mikey.

     Brand is a HANDSOME, MUSCULAR youth. A JOCK. His eyes are
     deep BLUE. His hair DIRTY BLONDE. He wears gym shorts and a
     half T-shirt over his TANNED BODY. Mikey gives an HONEST
     SIGH, letting his TRUE feelings through.

                       MIKEY
                                                        10.


        Naw. I was just tryin' to make
        myself feel better -- tryin’ to
        dilute myself -- ’er, dilate
        myself? -- ah -- dictate?

                  BRAND
        "Delude" yourself.

                  MIKEY
        Yeah.

                  BRAND
        I know how ya’ feel, wimp. I sure
        am gonna miss this place.

CAMERA FOLLOWS Mikey inside the house. We are in the
RECREATION ROOM of the Walsh home. CLUTTERED middle class.

Sears and Roebuck FURNITURE. Montgomery Ward TELEVISION.
J.C. Penney OIL PAINTINGS. Mikey SITS on the sofa. He OPENS
a "MAD MAGAZINE" to the back cover.

Mikey STARES at Al Jaffee's "FOLD IN". Mikey sits, trying
to FIGURE out the Fold In. He REPEATS the answer to
himself. He then FOLDS the magazine together. He has
GUESSED the correct answer. He TOSSES the magazine on the
floor. Mikey STARES. DEPRESSED.

CLARKE "MOUTH" DEVEREUX enters. Mouth is the group
PRANKSTER. A CLOWN. A 15 year old RICH LITTLE. TALL, GAWKY.
CURLY, unkempt hair. A HOMELY kid. He wears a blue
plumber's SHIRT, JEANS, and SNEAKERS. Across his shirt's
back, bright yellow letters spell out: "DEVEREUX'S
PLUMBING". His shirt is still SOAKING WET from the earlier
plumbing fiasco. A WRENCH, SCREWDRIVER and other PLUMBING
TOOLS poke out of his back pocket. Mouth has a perpetual
SMIRK on his face. A devilish GLEAM in his eye. He looks
around the room, noticing the feeling of DEPRESSION in the
air. Mouth tries to LIVEN things up.

                  MOUTH
        Wait? What's this? Finklestein's
        Funeral parlor? Lookit' you guys!
        Lyin' around like it was a Nuclear
        Saturday! C'mon dudes! This is our
        last weekend together! The last
        GOONY weekend! We should be goin'
        out in style! Cruisin’ the coast.
        Sniffin' some lace -- downin' the
        brews --
             (slaps Brand in the
             stomach, John Belushi
             impression)
                                                           11.


        But NOOOOOO--! YOU had to screw it
        up. You had to go and flunk your
        driving test.

Brand reaches out to HIT Mouth. Mouth JUMPS BACK. Out of
Brand's REACH. They are INTERRUPTED by the sound of a
ringing GATE BELL. Mouth TURNS.

                  MOUTH
        Jerk alert!

Mouth POINTS to the SLIDING GLASS DOORS. LAWRENCE "CHUNK"
COHEN is OUTSIDE of the gate. He is RINGING the bell.

Chunk is 14 years old. PUDGY. CLUMSY. Chunk is a chronic
LIAR, the king of FIBS. He wears a light summer JACKET. A
bright colored HAWAIIAN SHIRT. Large plaid BERMUDA SHORTS.
BLACK knee socks. Brand NEW sneakers. Chunk SHOUTS to the
guys.

                  CHUNK
        Hey, guys -- Ya' gotta' let me in!
        I just saw the most amazing thing -
        -

                  MOUTH
        First ya' gotta' do the "Truffle
        Shuffle".

It’s obvious that Mouth WON’T let Chunk inside. Chunk
SIGHS. He LIFTS up his SHIRT. Chunk EXPOSES his soft, pudgy
midsection. Chunk begins to TWIST and SHAKE. His belly
JIGGLES. Mouth is bent over with LAUGHTER. Mikey is not
AMUSED. He RUNS to the window, GLARING at Mouth.

                  MIKEY
        Cut it out, Mouth.

Mikey OPENS the window. He drops a STONE out of the window.

In RUBE GOLDBERG fashion, the rock causes a chain of events
that make the gate open for Chunk. Chunk HURRIES through
the gate. He ENTERS the house and EXCITEDLY looks at the
boys.

                  CHUNK
        You guys shoulda’ seen it -- cop
        cars -- chasin’ this four wheel
        deal -- it was the most amazing
        thing I ever saw!

                  MIKEY
                                                           12.


        More amazing than the time Michael
        Jackson came over to your house to
        use the bathroom?

                  MOUTH
        More amazing than the time you ate
        your weight in Straw Hat pizza?

                  BRAND
        More amazing than the time you
        saved those old people from that
        nursing home fire?

                  CHUNK
        Honest you guys. This time it’s for
        real.

NO ONE believes Chunk. Suddenly, we HEAR the JAMES BOND
THEME! It ECHOES from outside. With that, as if it were
some sort of ritual, Mikey STANDS and opens the window.

MIKEY’S P.O.V.

Mikey SEES RICKY "DATA" WANG. A 13 year old TECHNICAL
GENIUS. Data is CHINESE. Small FRAMED. THIN. He wears
circular, wire rimmed SPECTACLES. A "PRINCE” T-shirt.
JEANS. NIKES. He is never seen without his LARGE, JAPANESE
BACKPACK and FLOWING WHITE CAPE. His dark eyes are
PIERCING. INTELLIGENT. Data sees himself as Agent 007.

Data STANDS on the window of his home. He has ATTACHED
himself to a clothes line that CONNECTS Mikey’s house to
Data's. A LARGE PORTABLE CASSETTE player is STRAPPED to
Data's chest. The Bond Theme BLARES from the cassette.

Data FLIES from his house to Mikey's. He SHOOTS through the
open window, and FALLS into Mikey, who shoots back,
colliding with the bottom half of upside-down Brand, who in
turn arcs up, clunking Chunk. Chunk FALLS BACKWARDS and
KNOCKS a miniature MARBLE REPLICA of Michaelangel оls DAVID
to the floor. The statue lands with a THUD! Chunk NERVOUSLY
picks up the statue. It seems to be in ONE PIECE.

But he is met with a SHOCKING SIGHT. The statue's penis has
CRACKED OFF. Mikey gives himself another SHOT of Promtene
Mist, and picks up the broken statue. He HOLDS the statue
in one hand and the penis' in the other. Mikey PANICS,
holding out the broken penife high in the air.

                  MIKEY
        Oh my God! This is my Mom's
        favorite piece!
                                                        13.


                  MOUTH
        You wouldn't be here if it wasn't!

Data OPENS a map and looks at the guys.

                  DATA
        Any a' you guys ever hear of
        Detroit?

                  MOUTH
        Great place. It's where Motown
        started.
             (Data smiles)
        Also got the highest murder rate in
        the Country.

                  DATA
             (frowns)
        Well, that's where we’re movin'
        when we lose our house tomorrow.

                  MIKEY
        You shut up about that stuff. It'll
        never happen. Dad'll fix it.

                  BRAND
        Not unless he gets his next 400
        paychecks by tomorrow afternoon.
             (leads kids to window)
        C'mon. Check this out.

Brand leads the kids to a window. They look out.

GOONIES - P.O.V.

Three MEN in leisure suits are looking at Mikey’s home.
They seem to be discussing the entire area. One of them
carries a surveyor’s TRANSIT. They point, gesture and even
laugh. One man picks up a straight branch and imitates a
golf swing.

                  BRAND
        Lookit’ em. Smilin’.

                  MOUTH
        Practic’ly droolin.

                  DATA
        They can’t wait until tomorrow when
        they foreclose on all the whatevers
        --

                   MOUTH
                                                        14.


        -- and trash the goon docks.

                  BRAND
        When they wreck dur house, I hope
        they make it the sand trap --

                  MIKEY
        -- and they never get their balls
        out.

                  DATA
             (angry)
        This is war. Go on, Mikey -- Open
        that window -- I'll get 'em. I got
        all my special 007 assault options
        all rigged.
             (shouts)
        Glasses of death!

He opens his JACKET and REMOVES the cassette player. Inside
of his shirt, is a CRUDE DEVICE that is covered with
different CORDS. Attached to the cords are SMALL, COLOR
CODED PLASTIC RINGS. Data PULLS one of the cords. Two
rubber tipped DARTS fly out of the sides of Data’s glasses.

The darks MALFUNCTION, pull off Data’s glasses, and ATTACH
themselves to the window. Angry, he SCREAMS.

                  DATA
        Pinchers of peril!

He pulls ANOTHER CORD. A mechanical device, very similar to
the "chest buster" in “Alien”, BURSTS out of Data’s chest.

The device is PLASTIC, MECHANICAL CHATTERBOX TEETH, with a
homemade super spring for super grip. It shoots forward
ACROSS THE ROOM. The teeth are attached to a thick METAL
COIL, similar to a SLINKY. The teeth GRASP ONTO the Walsh
DRAPES and HANG THERE. Data TRIES to pull a few more cords.

NOTHING works. Data is LOSING his temper, ready to EXPLODE.

Mouth puts his ARM on Data’s shoulder to CALM him.

                  MOUTH
        Cool it, Double-Oh-Negative!

                  MIKEY
        Yeah, Data. None a’ your stuff ever
        works anyway.
                                                        15.


IRENE WALSH, Mikey and Brand’s Mother, ENTERS. Irene is in
her early FORTIES. Light BROWN hair. SLENDER. Dressed in a
PLAID SKIRT and MONOGRAMMED SWEATER. PRETTY, with a WARM,
KIND face. Her arm is in a SLING. BROKEN. Standing with her
is Rosalita, a middle-aged, pudgy MEXICAN woman. The new
MAID (whom we’ve seen in the first scene).

Mikey quickly passes the broken statue of David BEHIND HIS
BACK, to Chunk. Chunk nervously COVERS the broken statue
with his jacket. Irene LOOKS at Mikey and Brand.

                  IRENE
             (turns to Rosalita)
        Boys -- this is Rosalita.
             (motions to her broken
             arm)
        Because of my accident with that
        spindryer -- Rosalita’s here to
        help with the packing.

The boys WAVE. Rosalita SMILES.

                  IRENE
        Rosalita doesn't speak a word of
        English. And I was wondering if,
        well -- I know some of you have
        taken Spanish in school--

                  MOUTH
        I speak perfect Spanish, Mrs.
        Walsh.

Mikey ROLLS his eyes at Data. Irene SMILES at Mouth.

                  IRENE
        That’s wonderful, Clarke. I need
        help explaining some things to
        Rosalita -- If you would come with
        us --

Mouth SHOOTS to his feet, hurrying to Irene's side. She
TURNS to leave. PAUSING. She NOTICES Brand hanging upside
down.

                  IRENE
        Brandon, dear -- please be careful.
        Don't get an animalistic --'er,
        annualism -- Mmmmm, ah --

                  BRAND
        That's "anuerism", Ma.

                  IRENE
                                                             16.


             Yes. Right. Anuerism.

     Irene TURNS and EXITS with Mouth and Rosalita. Chunk
     CATCHES HIS BREATH. He PICKS up the statue. A large HOLE
     surrounds the statue's groin. Chunk gives a HOPEFUL look to
     Mikey.

                       CHUNK
             Think your Mom’s gonna notice?

                                                         CUT TO:


25   INT. MASTER BEDROOM WALSH HOME                                25

     Irene ENTERS with Rosalita and Mouth. Irene walks to a set
     of DRESSER DRAWERS. She POINTS each drawer out to Rosalita.

                       IRENE
             Socks and underwear in the top
             drawer. Shirts and blouses in the
             second. Pants in the bottom. Always
             separate the clothes.

     Rosalita stares BLANKLY. Irene TURNS to Mouth.

                       IRENE
             Can you translate that?

     Mouth NOfTs. With an EVIL GRIN, he points out the dresser
     drawers to Rosalita.

                       MOUTH
                  (Spanish, English
                  subtitles)
             The MARIJUANA goes in the top
             drawer. The COCAINE and SPEED in
             the second. HEROIN in the bottom.
             Always separate the DRUGS.

     Rosalita gives a SHOCKED look. Irene smiles, thinking Mouth
     has translated her directions PERFECTLY.


26   INT. LIVING ROOM                                              26

     CAMERA STAYS BEHIND the statue. The boys TRY to put the
     statue’s penis back into place. Chunk perforins the
     DELICATE TASK. Using Elmer’s GLUE. Finished, Chunk gives a
     HOPEFUL look to the others.

                       CHUNK
             How’s that?
                                                                17.


     The boys BREAK UP with laughter. Brand SLAPS Chunk in the
     head.

     CAMERA CIRCLES to the FRONT OF THE STATUE. Chunk has glued
     the penis on UPSIDE DOWN.

                       BRAND
             God didn’t mean it to go that way.
             If he did -- you’d all be pissing
             in your faces.


27   INT. UPSTAIRS HALLWAY                                            27

     Irene EXITS the master bedroom with Rosalita and Mouth.
     Irene points to a TRAP DOOR in the ceiling. She LOOKS at
     Rosalita.

                       IRENE
             That’s the attic. Mr. Walsh doesn't
             like anybody up there. Never.

     Irene NODS to Mouth. Turning to Rosalita, he begins HIS
     translation.

                       MOUTH
                  (Spanish, English
                  subtitles)
             Never go up there. It’s filled with
             Mr. Walsh's SEXUAL TORTURE DEVICES.

     Rosalita’s face goes WHITE with fear.


28   INT. BATHROOM                                                    28

     Irene and Mouth enter with the HORRIFIED-Rosalita. Irene
     opens a SUPPLY CLOSET. She POINTS inside.

                       IRENE
             This is the supply closet. You’ll
             find everything you-need inside.
             Brooms. Mops. Insect spray. Lysol.

     Irene NODS to Mouth. He LOOKS at Rosalita.

                       MOUTH
                  (Spanish, English
                  subtitles)
             If you do a bad job, you’ll be
             LOCKED in here with the
             cockroaches! For two weeks without
             food and water.
                                                                18.


29   INT. RECREATION ROOM                                             29

     Irene, Mouth and a NAUSEOUS Rosalita enter. The boys are
     GATHERED around the television. Playing MARBLES. Feigning
     INNOCENCE.

                       IRENE
                  (kiss to his cheek)
             Thank you, Clarke. That was so nice
             of you.

                       MOUTH
             Nice is my middle name, Mrs. Walsh.

     Irene SPOTS THE’STATUE. Back in its ORIGINAL place. LEAF
     over its genitals. She sighs, knowing that Chunk is
     responsible. She TURNS to Chunk.

                       IRENE
             Lawrence --
                  (indicates that she wants
                  the statue)

     Chunk PICKS up the statue and gives it to her. Irene HOLDS
     the statue.

     She REMOVES the leaf. The penis begins to FALL OFF the
     statue. Slowly TILTING. FALLING over. The glue stretches.

     Mikey sees this and takes a hit from the Promotene Mist.
     Rosalita is, of course, shocked and makes the sign of the
     cross.

     Irene gives a FLUSTERED nod. She TURNS to Brand.

                       IRENE
             I’m taking Rosalita to the grocery
             store. I’11 be home in about an
             hour.

                       IRENE
                  (sees Mikey taking hit)
             Brandon, you stay inside with
             Mikey. If he's got asthma -- he
             shouldn't be out in the rain.

                       BRAND
             He should be in a plastic bubble.

                       IRENE
             I'm serious, Brandon. He takes one
             step outside, and you're -- you're
             --
                                                                19.


                  (trying to come up with
                  something hip)
             Dead meat.

     Brand gives a reluctant sigh. Irene and a frightened
     Rosalita exit. Brand leaps at Mikey. TACKLING him.

                       BRAND
             You want a breathin' problem? You
             got one!

     Brand holds Mikey in a strangling headlock. Mikey is
     wheezing, coughing. Mikey struggles in the background.
     Brand finally pushes Mikey away.

     Mouth, pondering something, looks at Mikey.

                       MOUTH
             Hey -- what's your Father gonna do
             with all that stuff in the attic?

                       MIKEY
             He's gonna give it back to the
             museum -- or to whoever they pick
             to be the new Assistant Curtain --
             er, Curley --

                        BRAND
             Curator.

                       MOUTH
             That means it's all gonna go to the
             rich people anyway. Let's go up and
             see if there's anything we can take
             for our parents.

     Everyone joins in with a "YEAH! COOL! LET'S DO IT!" The
     kids RUN OFFSCREEN. Only Mikey stays behind, PROTESTING.

                       MIKEY
             Hey, guys -- My Dad’s responsible
             for all that stuff -- Don't wreck
             anything -- I 'll bet the museum’s
             got a list of it all somewhere --
             Guys?

     Mikey FOLLOWS the guys OFFSCREEN.

                                                            CUT TO:


30   INT. ATTIC                                                       30
                                                         20.


DARK. DUSTY. The attic is crowded with historical Cauldron
Point museum pieces. They date from the middle and late
SIXTEENTH CENTURY. There are OIL PAINTINGS, SCULPTURES,
antique FURNITURE, COSTUMES, WHALING HARPOONS, PIRATE AND
FISHING MEMORABILIA, etc.

A LARGE SKYLIGHT looms over, the priceless
collection.BLACK, RAGING storm clouds are visible through
the skylight windows. The. oncoming RUMBLING OF THUNDER can
be heard.

The boys enter through a TRAP DOOR in the floor. Brand is
FIRST. He shines his FLASHLIGHT through the attic. The
others FOLLOW. Mikey is the last to climb inside. He sees
the attic for the FIRST TIME. SHOCKED. AMAZED. All of the
boys stare wide eyed at the roomful of items.

                  MOUTH
        I can't believe somethin’ this cool
        is in your house.

                  CHUNK
        Yeah. We only keep old Christmas
        decorations in our attic.

THUNDERCRACK! A FLASH OF LIGHTENING. From the skylight a
mosaic of rain patterns slowly dances across the Goonies.

                  MIKEY
             (frightened)
        Okay. You guys saw it. Let’s get
        outta' here.

                  BRAND
        Whatsa' matter? Scared again?

                  MIKEY
        Yeah -- just like you in the
        elevator.

Brand's eyes burn. He GRABS Mikey in another headlock.

                  BRAND
        You shut up about that elevator!
        You understand? Huh?

Mikey forces a nod. Wheezing. Brand releases his grip.
Mikey LIES on the floor. Catching his breath.

                  MIKEY
        Can we go now? It's dusty up here.
        My hay fever’s actin' up.
                                                         21.


Brand leads Mikey and the others on a trek through the
attic. Mikey follows. Suddenly, a HIGH PITCHED VOICE
INTERRUPTS.

                  MOUTH (O.S.)
        Mikey -- Oh, Mikey -- You're such a
        cute little boy -- Come and kiss me
        --

The boys turn to the direction of the voice. It ECHOES from
behind the tattered OIL PAINTING of the naked woman and
Pirate Captain. A TONGUE juts out of a tear in the woman's
mouth, LASCIVIOUSLY licking its lips. Mikey STARES.
SHOCKED. Brand and Data SHARE a chuckle.

Suddenly, a FINGER pops out of each of the woman's nipples.
The fingers twist and turn. Creating a bizarre image. Mouth
calls out, again imitating a woman.

                  MOUTH (O.S.)
        Come here, Mikey. Make me feel like
        a woman.

                  MIKEY
        Stop bein' so perverted, Mouth.
        You're wreckin' the painting.

Mouth’s head POPS UP from behind the painting.

                  MOUTH
        Easy, dude. It was already trashed.

The kids continue WALKING through the attic. They
INVESTIGATE the various ITEMS.

                  CHUNK
        What's all this stuff?

                  MIKEY
        The museum did some kinda' show --
        ya' know -- 'bout the history of
        our town -- It was called -- ah --
        Mmmm -- A ratropack?

                  BRAND
        Retrospective.

                  MIKEY
        Yeah. Anyway -- these are the
        rejects.

                  CHUNK
        Kinda’ like us.
                                                          22.


Mikey SHRUGS.

The boys RUMMAGE through the items. Each of the boys GRABS
a particular piece of Pirate CLOTHING or EQUIPMENT. Mikey
puts on an EYE PATCH. Mouth and Data find large PIRATE HATS
with feathers. Brand GRABS a SWORD. Chunk puts on a Pirate
COAT and SCARF.

As the boys continue to investiage, Data stares in awe.

                  DATA
        Just think of it. All this stuff
        belonged to guys who walked on the
        same ground that we do -- went
        swimmin' in the same Ocean,
        breathed the same air --

                  CHUNK
        Yeacchhh. They had to breathe the
        Herring Factory air too?

                  DATA
        Naw -- they didn't have herring
        then. This was right after
        Christopher Columbus -- the 16th
        century -- they only had ships.
        They were adventure guys and
        explorers -- they made maps and
        captured Indians and spent all
        their time killin’ each other with
        swords -- ya' know -- Errol Flynn
        stuff.

Mikey flips through a collection of framed portraits and
photographs, He SPOTS something that catches his interest.

A FRAMED MAP. But the map is impossible to read. It is
covered by a YELLOWED, DUSTY PIECE OF GLASS. Mikey tries to
remove the FRAME. Won't budge. He TURNS over the map. The
back is covered by a sheet of WOOD. There is only one way
to read the map: Break the glass. Mikey can't bring himself
to do it.

He sees Chunk STRUGGLING to remove a paint can from his
foot. Mikey SMILES. An IDEA.

Mikey holds out the map to Chunk.

                  MIKEY
        Hey, Chunk -- hold this for me.
                                                           23.


Chunk gives a NOD. He takes the map from Mikey. Mikey
turns. Pretending to examine another framed picture.
WAITING.

Within a matter of seconds Chunk loses his balance. He
drops the map. It hits the floor. Its glass covering
shatters into a million pieces. Mikey picks up the map. He
feigns an ANGRY look at Chunk.

                  MIKEY
        Can’t you do anything right?

Chunk gives an embarrassed shrug.

Mikey picks up the map. He removes a few small remaining
pieces of glass. The map easily slides out of the frame.

Along with a small, golden DOUBLOON that is fixed in the
map’s frame. Mikey studies the map and the doubloon. The
map is now completely visible. It is beautifully detailed.

ELABORATE. HAND PAINTED. All of the writing on the map is
in SPANISH. The map is signed “ONE EYED WILLY"! Mikey
STARES at the signature. There is an intricate drawing of a
coastline. The coastline leads to a mountainous cliff.

Below the cliff is a large “X”. CAMERA DOLLIES TOWARD THE
"X".

Mikey is FASCINATED by the map. Brand suddenly grabs the
map out of Mikey's hand. The other guys gather around, all
wearing various pieces of Pirate clothing and equipment.

Chunk looks over Mikey’s shoulder, studying the Doubloon.

                  CHUNK
        This says, "1532". 'Zat a year?

                  MOUTH
        It's your top score on "Pole
        Position".

                  DATA
             (running his finger along
             the map's coastline)
        Maybe that's how it used to look --
        ya' know -- before they put up all
        the Wendy's and McDonald's.

                  CHUNK
        All the good stuff.

                  BRAND
                                                        24.


             (points to Spanish phrase
             that headlines the map)
        What's all this. Spanish junk?

                  MOUTH
             (translates)
        "Chunk's -- Father Screws --
        Sheep".

Chunk HITS Mouth. Mouth gives an OBNOXIOUS CACKLE and
SHRUGS. He translates again.

                  MOUTH
        "Ye Intruders beware Crushing death
        and grief. Soaked with blood, Of
        the trespassing thief"

Everyone gives Mouth a puzzled look. Mouth raises his hand
in the BOY SCOUT FLEDGE. He's TELLING THE TRUTH.

                  DATA
        That map's old news. Everybody and
        his Grandfather went after that
        thing when our parents were our
        ages. Didn't ya’ ever hear of that
        Pirate guy? "One Eyed Willy"?

                  MIKEY
        Hey! One Eyed Willy! He was the
        biggest pirate of his time! My Dad
        told me all about him one night.

                  BRAND
        Yeah. Dad'll tell you anything to
        get you to go to sleep.

                  MIKEY
             (ignoring him, to others)
        He had millions in treasure, see,
        but the King sent his ships after
        him. So Willy took his ship,
        called-the INFERNO, and ducked into
        this cave to hide. But the King's
        men sealed him up inside it with
        cannon fire.

                  MOUTH
        Your Dad oughta write Saturday
        morning TV junk for teeny little
        kids - like you.

                  MIKEY
                                                             25.


             My Dad tells me the truth! And he
             told me that Willy and his bunch
             spent years hiding out down there,
             building these underground caves,
             loaded with all kindsa booby traps
             to protect:the treasure.

     Chunk finds a NEWSPAPER CLIPPING. It is a framed, yellowed
     paper with a photo of a smiling man who bears a strange
     resemblance to Gabby Hayes in a MINER'S HAT. Chunk reads
     the headline.

                       CHUNK
             Guys, look at this! "Chester
             Copperpot Missing in Pursuit of
             Local Legend! Reclusive Scavenger
             claims: "I have the key to One Eyed
             Willy!"

                       DATA
             Nobody ever found nothing. Why do
             ya' think that map’s sitting up
             here instead of in a safety deposit
             box somewhere!

     Mikey’s eyes are WIDE. HOPEFUL.

                       MIKEY
             But -- but what if -- What if, you
             guys’! What if this leads to "One
             Eyed Willy’s” rich stuff?

                       BRAND
                  (interrupts, to kids)
             Take off all that junk. My Mom’s
             gonna come back.

     The kids REMOVE all of the Pirate clothing and equipment.
     The doorbell RINGS and the kids RUSH down to see who is at
     the front door.


31   INT. RECREATION ROOM                                          31

     Three men in leisure suits stand outside of the screen
     door, like dangerous apparitions. They talk to the kids as
     though they were infants. One guys keeps practicing his
     golf swing.

                       PERKINS
             Hello, little guys. I'm Mr.
             Perkins. Troy’s father.
                                                        26.


                  BRAND
             (respectfully)
        My Dad’s not here,Mr. Perkins.

                  PERKINS
        Is your Mommy home?

                  BRAND
             (bristling at this
             remark)
        No, sir. She’s out at the market
        buying Pampers for all us kids.

                  PERKINS
             (a false laugh)
        Well, you can give these papers to
        your Father to read over and sign.
        Somebody from my office will pick
        them up in the morning.

The door is CLOSED.

                  MIKEY
        What is all that stuff?

                  BRAND
        It’s pad’s business.

Brand is very depressed. The boys take pause as they look
at the complicated legal forms and back out at the
departing men. Mikey STARES. DREAMING.

                  MIKEY
        If I found rich stuff -- I’d pay
        all my Dad’s bills. Maybe he could
        get to sleep at night -- instead of
        sittin' up trying’ to figure out a
        way for us to stay here.

                  ALL THE BOYS
        Yeah. Me too. Me three.

The boys pause. WORRIED. Brand breaks the silence by
suddenly PULLING Mikey by the hair.

                  BRAND
        You can forget about any
        adventures, limp lungs —- if I take
        you out, Mom’ll ground my ass. And
        I got a date with Andy on Friday.

                  MOUTH
                                                               27.


             You’re dreamin’, dude. Besides --
             who’s gonna drive you? Her parents?
             Then you gotta make it with her and
             her Mother.

                       BRAND
             Eat it, Mouth.

     Brand walks back to his exercise area. Mikey, seeing that
     Brand is out of sight, sneakily removes the map from
     beneath his shirt. He opens the map. The guys push in, all
     looking with dreamy speculation.

     CAMERA DOLLIES INTO THE MAP. A FLASH OF LIGHTENING sparkles
     the map.

     MATCH CUT TO SKY

     A long, thin crack of lightening shoots across the sky.

                                                         CUT TO:

     INSERT - TELEVISION - MTV LOGO

     INSERT - ONE MARBLE SHOOTING INTO A TRIANGLE OF MARBLES

     INSERT - A CHEST EXERCISER BEING PULLED ACROSS A TENSE
     CHEST


32   INT. WALSH HOUSE - DAY                                          32

     RECREATION ROOM. SEVERAL MINUTES LATER. Mikey, Chunk,
     Mouth, and Data are gathered in the recreation room,
     PLAYING MARBLES. A look of extreme GUILT covers all their
     faces. Brand is in the background. He sits in a chair.
     Shirt off. He pulls a METAL, SPRING CHEST EXERCISER across
     his chest.

     Mouth gives a sly look back at Brand. He turns to the
     others and NODS. They NOD BACK. Mouth, Chunk, and Data
     sneak up behind Brand. Meanwhile, Mikey GATHERS his marbles
     and puts them into a small LEATHER POUCH. He stuffs the
     pouch into his pocket.

     The kids sneak around the comer. All three quickly grab the
     chest exerciser out of Brand's hands! They WRAP it around
     Brand’s chest and arms! Before Brand can react, Mouth
     CLAMPS the two ends of the exerciser together. Brand is
     TRAPPED. Unable to MOVE. The exerciser works like heavy
     metal CHAINS. It SECURES Brand to the chair.

                        BRAND
                                                              28.


             Hey! Wait -- Lemmee out!

                                                         CUT TO:


33   EXT. WALSH HOUSE                                               33

     The Goonies, walking through the backyard, careful NOT TO
     WAKE GRANDPA, who lies ASLEEP on a hammock. The kids
     WHISPER to each other:

                       ALL
                  (whispering)
             Careful, don't wake Grandpa! Shhh!
             Don't wake him!

     Just as the kids round the corner of the house, a devious
     Mouth gives a light shove to the hammock, causing Grandpa
     to WAKE.

     CLOSE UP - TEN SPEED BICYCLE TIRE

     A hand is LETTING THE AIR out of the tire. CAMERA PULLS
     BACK. We see that Mouth is letting the air out of Brand's
     bike tire. In the background, Mikey, Chunk and Data CLIMB
     ONTO their bikes.

                       MIKEY
                  (to Mouth)
             It took him 376 lawn jobs to pay
             for that. It's his most favorite
             thing in the world.

                       MOUTH
             Now it’s his most FLATTEST thing in
             the world.

     Mikey HEARS Brand SCREAMING from inside.

                       BRAND (O.S.)
             Mikey -- I'm gonna hit you so hard,
             when you wake up -- your clothes
             are gonna be outta' style.

     Mikey PAUSES. Then FOLLOWS the others. As he SHOOTS out of
     the driveway, BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN'S "COVER ME" FILLS THE
     SOUNDTRACK.


34   EXT. STREET - PAST MUSEUM                                      34

     The boys on their bicycles. Each boy's bike fits their
     INDIVIDUAL personality. The boys PASS the TOWN MUSEUM.
                                                                29.


     Mikey's Father is working on the museum's rooftop,
     HAMMERING a leaky shingle. Mikey SHOUTS, "Hi, Dad!" to his
     Father.

                          MR. WALSH
             HELLO!


35   INT. WALSH HOUSE - RECREATION ROOM                               35

     Brand is still trapped in the chair. GRUNTING. GROANING.

     STRUGGLING with the metal springs. Brand causes the chair
     to bounce and move backwards. The kitchen door suddenly
     OPENS. ROSALITA, the maid, stands in the doorway. Her arms
     are filled with GROCERIES. She sees Brand BOUNCING TOWARD
     HER. Like an oncoming freight train. This bizarre image
     only confirms her WORST FEARS about this house. Rosalita
     screams and DROPS her groceries. Irene walks up BEHIND
     Rosalita. Irene sees the bonded Brand bouncing on the
     chair. She CHUCKLES.

                       IRENE
             Brandon. Why can't you do sit ups
             or push ups like normal kids?

     Irene and a HORRIFIED Rosalita walk by. Brand gives a
     HELPLESS look.

                                                         CUT TO:


36   EXT. STOP ’N SNACK                                               36

     Mouth, Chunk, Data and Mikey SPEED by on their bikes. Mikey
     HOLDS the open map. His eyes constantly GLANCE to it. He is
     OBSESSED with following the map. Up ahead is the Stop ’N
     Snack. Teenage hangout. Mouth, Chunk, and Data turn their
     bikes toward the Stop 'N Snack. Mikey continues forward.

     He suddenly STOPS, realizing that the kids have left him.
     Mikey TURNS and sees the others entering the STOP ’N SNACK.
     He SHOUTS and holds up the MAP.

                       MIKEY
             Hey, guys -- what about this? Huh?


37   EXT. WALSH HOUSE                                                 37

     Brand RUNS out the front door, chest exerciser in hand. We
     HEAR Irene SHOUT from inside.
                                                                30.


                       IRENE
             Don’t come home without your
             brother! Or I’ll commit Hare
             Krishna.

                       BRAND
                  (mumbles to himself)
             That’s Hare Kari, Ma.

     Brand sees the air OUT of his bike tires. His eyes FILL
     with RAGE. He KICKS the bicycle over. He LOOKS around.

     Riding in the driveway is Data’s SISTER. She is riding a
     TINY GIRL’S BIKE. Painted bright purple, with pink flowers.

     TRAINING WHEELS are attached to the rear wheels. Brand has
     NO other choice. It's the ONLY means of transportation in
     sight. He rims to the driveway, PICKS UP THE GIRL, removing
     her from the bike. Brand HOPS on the bike. He PAUSES, looks
     back to the girl and gives her the CHEST EXERCISER.

                       BRAND
             Here. Trade ya'.

     The girls STARES at the exerciser. Brand AWKWARDLY pedals
     out of the driveway. The girl BURSTS into tears.


38   INT. STOP N' SNACK                                               38

     SYLVIA KEESTER, an OBESE, ELDERLY woman, works the CHECK-
     OUT COUNTER. Data is purchasing a pack of baseball cards.

     Sylvia rings up the order on the COMPUTER CASH REGISTER.
     The computer JAMS. Sylvia POUNDS the cash'register.
     FRUSTRATED.

     Data OPENS a tiny door on the register. He begins to fiddle
     with two small WIRES.

     Mouth stands by the MAGAZINE RACK. A sly look in his eyes,
     Mouth slips a copy of "PLAYBOY" magazine behind a copy of
     "OMNI". He begins to READ.

     Chunk stands beside the JUNK FOOD. He LOOKS around. Coast
     is CLEAR. Chunk HURRIEDLY tears open a Twinkie. He quickly
     SLURPS out the Twinkle's creme filling. He REWRAPS the
     hollow twinkie and puts it BACK ON the shelf.

     Mikey enters the store. He RUSHES over to Chunk. Mikey
     WAVES the map in Chunk's fate.

                          MIKEY
                                                           31.


        Hey, Chunk -- C'mon -- we were
        gonna look for rich stuff -- we
        gotta do something now!!

Chunk is TOO BUSY eating Hostess fillings to speak with
Mikey. A frustrated Mikey RUNS over to Data, who is still
fiddeling with the cash register.

                  MIKEY
        Data, what if they make us move?
        Where we gonna go?

                  SYLVIA
        Don't bother 'im while he's workin.

Mikey SIGHS. He RUNS to Mouth.

                  MIKEY
        What if they start tearing down our
        houses?

                  MOUTH
        Easy, dude -- let your folks handle
        this. That's their job -- our job
        is to get through theweekend
        without destroying too many
        braincells.

Mikey gives himself a SHOT of Promotene Mist. He grabs a
MAD MAGAZINE, and as always, guesses the FOLD IN. He
suddenly NOTICES something. On the LOWER magazine rack.
It's a section of dusty, "CAULDRON POINT" TOURIST MAPS.
Mikey GRABS one of the maps and OPENS it.

Meanwhile, Chunk has made his way to the FROZEN TREAT
FREEZER. He OPENS the freezer door. He pokes his head
deeply INSIDE. Out of sight, he opens a container of HAGEN
DAAS. He takes a few LICKS from the top. Then quickly
CLOSES the lid. He GRABS another container. He's going to
SAMPLE everything.

Data still FIDDLES with the cash register. It suddenly
BEEPS and LIGHTS. It's WORKING again. Good as NEW. Sylvia
gives a satisfied RUFFLE to Data's hair.

Sitting on the floor, Mikey has OPENED the tourist map and
the museum map. He has laid them SIDE BY SIDE. Mikey is
COMPARING the two. CAMERA DOLLIES INTO THE TWO MAPS. The
coastline paths of both maps are IDENTICAL. Several key
ROCKS and CLIFFS also MATCH. Mikey's eyes are BRIGHT.

HOPEFUL. He NODS to himself. MUMBLING.
                                                           32.


                  MIKEY
        I know where this is.

Suddenly, Mouth's VOICE echoes through the store.

                  MOUTH
        Jerk alert!

Mouth POINTS to the’ ENTRANCE DOOR.

TROY PERKINS struts in. Like he OWNS the place. Troy is 17
years old. TAN. COCKY. He's dressed in a white POLO TENNIS
OUTFIT. EXPENSIVE tennis shoes. His hair is neatly STYLED.
A spoiled rich BRAT. He lives in an expensive home on the
HILLSIDE. Walking BESIDE Troy is ANDREA "ANDY” CARMICHAEL.
She is 16 years old. The face of an ANGEL.

Smooth, CREAMY complexion. Her thick, BRIGHT RED hair falls
to her shoulders. Her bright GREEN eyes are dazzeling. She
is SLENDER. Filled with ENERGY. A BEAUTY. Still in her
cheerleaders outfit. She is wearing Troy's WHITE LETTER
SWEATER. Troy's name is written in SCRIPT on the bottom of
the sweater. Andy also lives on the HILLSIDE.

Walking beside Andy is STEFANIE "STEF" STEINBRENNER, also
age 16. Andy’s BEST FRIEND. Stef is short. PUDGY. Dark
brown hair. GLASSES. She is wearing Denim FISHERMAN
COVERALLS. STEF IS TOUGH. QUICK WITTED. BRIGHT. SHE LIVES
IN THE "GOON DOCKS".

Troy walks straight to the MAGAZINE RACK. He GRABS the
"Playboy” Magazine from Mouth and begins to PAGE through.
Mouth, so ANGRY he's been rendered speechless, GLARES at
Troy. Mouth BACKS OFF and picks up another magazine.

Mikey SEES Andy. A VISION. He stares at her with ADORING
EYES.

Stef and Mouth EXCHANGE a glance. Stef CRINKLES her nose.

                  STEF
        You still smell like a plumber’s
        son.

                  MOUTH
        You still smell like a fisherman's
        daughter.

Troy NUDGES Andy.

                  TROY
        Hey, Andy!
                                                          33.


She turns. Troy holds up the "Playboy" CENTERFOLD, Written
above the photo, in large red letters, are the words, "CAN
YOU MEASURE UP"? Troy gives a LECHEROUS GRIN to Andy.

                  TROY
        Can YOU measure up?

Andy looks away. EMBARRASSED. Troy emits a HORSE LAUGH.
Mikey gives a painfully HONEST look to Andy.

                  MIKEY
        You're a lot prettier than that,
        Andy.

Andy SMILES. Giving a casual, BROTHERLY, ruffle to Mikey’s
hair. Mikey SMILES. In HEAVEN.

Meanwhile, Chunk still has his head BURIED IN THE FREEZER.
Troy NOTICES. He WALKS over. He BRINGS the freezer door
down on Chunk's head. TRAPPING Chunk in the freezer. Chunk
PANICS. Troy CHUCKLES.

                  TROY
        My Mom's makin' a "Goon Pizza"
        tonight. She's gonna need some
        frozen dough.

Mikey notices. He SHOUTS to Troy.

                  MIKEY
        Why don’t you leave 'im alone?!?

Troy PAUSES. He RELEASES his grip on Chunk, Troy WALKS back
to Mikey.

                  TROY
        Did I hear right? Did I hear a
        Goony telling me what to do?

Troy TOWERS over Mikey. He’s ready to HIT Mikey, when he
notices the ANCIENT MAP. RESTING on the floor. He REALIZES
that it’s important to Mikey. He TURNS from Mikey and GRABS
the old map. Mikey CLAWS at Troy.

                  MIKEY
        Let go. That's art you're messin’
        with.
                                                           34.


Troy holds the map HIGH in the air. ABOVE Mikey's reach.
Troy is CONFUSED by the map. But he realizes its IMPORTANCE
to the boys. Troy grabs a pack of cigarette TOBACCO from
the counter. He POURS the tobacco out onto the map. He
begins to ROLL the map. Like a CIGARETTE. He gives an EVIL
grin to the boys.

                  TROY
        Just can't get rolling papers like
        this anymore.

Mikey TRIES to grab the map. Troy gives him a HARD SHOVE.
It KNOCKS Mikey to the floor. Troy FINISHES rolling the
large "cigarette”. He removes a Butane LIGHTER from his
pocket. FLICK. A large FLAME APPEARS. Troy MOVES the flame
to the end of the "cigarette". He LIGHTS UP!

The boys WATCH in horror as Troy takes a LONG PUFF. The end
of the map BURNS! CRINKLING! Mikey HIDES his eyes. Troy
blows out SMOKE RINGS. He gives a relieved SIGH. A few more
puffs and the map will be destroyed! Troy moves to take
ANOTHER PUFF. Mouth WALKS up. He RAISES his eyebrow, doing
his JACK NICHOLSON impersonation.

                  MOUTH
        Ya' know -- the way you're puffing'
        on that cigarette -- it reminds me
        of somethin’.

                  TROY
        Yeah? What's that?

                  MOUTH
        The time I french kissed your
        Mother.

Troy’s eyes fill with MURDER. He DROPS the map. LEAPING for
Moutn. Mikey quickly GRABS the map. STOMPING out the fire.
Troy has TACKLED Mouth. He is THROWING punches; Mouth
COVERS his face. Mikey LEAPS onto Troy. Mikey GRABS Troy
around the neck, trying to pull him OFF MOUTH.

In the background, Data tries to HELP Mikey! Data opens his
shirt and PULLS A CORD! He SHOUTS "SMOKE SCREEN”! A RUBBER
GARDEN HOSE shoots out of Data's sleeve. But instead of
emitting a steady stream of smoke, the hose slowly
SMOLDERS.

Data holds his arm in pain, as if it were ON FIRE. He RUNS
to an ICE MACHINE and hurries his arm INTO THE ICE! A smile
of RELIEF covers his face.

Meanwhile, Troy is busy DEFENDING himself against Mikey.
                                                           35.


Troy turns and GRABS Mikey with his left hand. Troy PULLS
BACK his right hand, ready to PUNCH Mikey in the face. As
Troy's hand FLIES TOWARD Mikey, it is suddenly GRABBED,
STOPPED in midair, by another HAND. CAMERA PULLS BACK. We
see that BRAND has grabbed hold of Troy's fist. Brand
GLARES at Troy.

                  BRAND
        Nobody hits my brother except me!

AFRAID of Brand, Troy gets off Mikey. The boys are
RELIEVED. Brand GRABS Troy by the shirt. Ready to FIGHT.

Troy LOOKS away. SCARED. Mikey WATCHES, his eyes beaming
with PRIDE. Brand RELEASES his grip on Troy. Troy STANDS.

FORCING a cocky grin, he looks at all of the goonies.

                  TROY
        Can’t wait till Monday -- when
        my'Dad kicks you all out in the
        street.
             (imitates golf swing)
        While you goonies are pilin’ all
        your stuff into moving vans -- I’ll
        be teeing off on what used to be
        your front lawns.

Troy CHUCKLES. He TURNS to Andy.

                  TROY
        Our court time starts in five
        minutes. I’ll be waiting outside.

Andy gives a NONCHALANT shrug. Brand TURNS to Andy. He
shoots her a JEALOUS look. Troy STRUTS out of the STOP 'N
SNACK. THROUGH the window, tie see him get into his bright
red, MUSTANG convertible.

Mikey has UNROLLED the map. It has SURVIVED the burning
with only a tiny singed edge.

Brand TURNS to Andy. Their eyes MEET, a look of tragic
desire! They want to be together, but this isn't the time -
- She FLASHES her pretty eyes. Brand sorts of melts down.

Brand TURNS to Mikey. He GRABS the map from Mikey. SLAPPING
Mikey's head.

                  BRAND
        Mom’s waitin’ for you. You just
        blew your whole life, pal.
             (to the other guys)
                                                                36.


             The rest of you guys, too -- you're
             all history. We don't need friends
             like you in our lives!

     With that, Brand tucks the map into his back pocket. Mouth
     walks up to Brand. Mouth turns on the phony charm, putting
     his arm around Brand. Mouth starts to sing.

                       MOUTH
             "Here's to good friends, tonight is
             kinda' special; The beer we pour,
             must be something more somehow--"

     As he continues to sing, Motith uses his FREE HAND to
     remove the map from Brand's pocket. Brand SHOVES Mouth
     away.

                       BRAND
             You don't have to drink to make
             friends, wimp.

     Mouth turns to the other goonies and SHOWS them the map.
     They make a RUN for it. A befuddled Brand reaches into his
     back pocket, realizing that the map is gone. He RUNS after
     the kids.


39   EXT. STOP 'N SNACK - DAY                                         39

     Mikey, Mouth, Data and Chunk hurriedly RIDE OFF on their
     bicycles. Mouth holds THE ROLLED MAP UNDER HIS ARM. Brand
     DASHES outside. He SEES the boys RIDE OFF into, the
     distance.


40   EXT. STREET LEADING OUT OF TOWN - DAY                            40

     CLOSE UP - MIKEY, checking the MAP.

     CAMERA PULLS BACK.

     The kids are riding their bikes, moving further up the
     coastal highway. The Springsteen song BLASTS from Data’s
     stereo.

     The kids CONTINUE to look back.


41   EXT. COUNTRY CLUB ROAD - DAY                                     41

     Chunk TURNS to his RIGHT. He sees the HILLSIDE COUNTRY
     CLUB. Chunk points to the Club, looking at Data.
                                                             37.


                       CHUNK
             My Dad tried to join there once.
             When he still had his job. But they
             wouldn't let us in.

                       DATA
             You kiddin'? They wouldn’t let none
             of us in. That place is kinda’ like
             the "Dairy Queen". They only got
             one flavor.


42   EXT. ROAD NEAR ROCKS - DAY                                    42

     MIKEY'S P.O.V. - THREE TALL NARROW ROCKS jut out of the
     ocean. In a "V" PATTERN. Mikey PAUSES. THINKING to himself.

                       MIKEY
             I know this place --

     It HITS him. A REALIZATION! Mikey NODS to himself.

                       MIKEY
             That’s it. That's it.

     CAMERA PANS FROM MIKEY. TO HIS P.O.V.: A TALL, NATURAL
     OBELISK. It stretches several HUNDRED FEET into the air. A
     very steep HILL. Very WIDE. Lined with JUTTING, JAGGED
     rock. The Coastal Road is DIRECTLY in front of it -- At the
     obelisk, the road makes a SHARP TURN. Veering off into a
     different DIRECTION.


43   EXT. ROAD THROUGH WOODS - DAY                                 43

     Brand is way behind the kids, furiously pedaling the girl's
     pink bicycle. Troy’s red Mustang is coming up behind Brand.

     The Mustang starts to smoke rubber, and reduces speed from
     75 to 5 MPH. The Mustang rides BESIDE Brand. Troy CHUCKLES.
     Andy LOOKS away, embarrassed. Stef TURNS to Andy.

                       STEF
             No wonder he can't get a license.

     Brand TURNS away. Angrily HUFFING and PUFFING. As Andy and
     Stef look at Brand, Troy is slyly adjusting the rearview
     mirrow, tilting it downward in order to see down into
     Andy's shirt. Andy NOTICES. She GLARES at Troy.

                       ANDY
                                                                38.


             Troy -- you touch that mirror again
             and I swear to God I'll sock you in
             the mouth!

     Troy quickly MOVES his hand from the mirror. Andy LOOKS
     BACK to Brand, trying to be NICE.

                       ANDY
             Brand -- Can we give you a lift
             somewhere?

     Brand SMILES, his eyes locking with Andy's in a moment that
     tells us they're "communicating". Troy NOTICES this and
     fumes. He forces a SMILE to Brand.

                       TROY
             Yeah, Walsh -- Grab hold of
             somethin' you can handle.

     Brand GRABS hold of the door handle. Troy TIGHTLY grasps
     Brand's wrist. Troy TURNS UR the radio and floors the gas.

     Brand is TRAPPED. The Mustang is true to its stats, it goes
     from zero to sixty in 8.0 seconds -- and so does Brand. The
     bike pedals are churning so quickly, Brand has to lift his
     feet from the bike. Andy SCREAMS.

                       ANDY
             Troy!!! Let 'im go!!!! You're going
             too fast!! You're gonna kill 'im!!
             Let ’im go!!!

     Troy NODS and releases his grip on Brand. Troy SMILES at
     Brand.

                       TROY
             So long, sucker.

     The Mustang makes a SHARP TURN OFF the main road. But Brand
     KEEPS going. His training wheels FALL OFF. All the rubber
     on the tires peel off, smoke, and the bike moves only on
     the rims, SPARKING LIKE MAD! The little bike is last seen
     DISAPPEARING off the shoulder and into a field of tall
     grass.


44   INSERT - EXT. ROAD WITH MOSSY TREES                              44

     The boys follow the map.


45   INSERT - EXT. BRIDGE BY BEACH                                    45
                                                                39.


     They walk their bikes across the bridge.


46   INSERT - EXT. ROCKY BEACH                                        46

     Mikey knows where they're headed.


47   INSERT - EXT. HOLLOW WITH MOSSY TREES                            47

     They continue to follow the map.


48   INSERT - EXT. SPOT TO TRIANGULATE ROCKS                          48

     Mikey is able to line up the 3 rocks and the lighthouse
     through the notches in the coin.


49   EXT. HILL ABOVE LIGHTHOUSE - DAY                                 49

     Mikey arrives at the top. Data and Chunk are BEHIND him,
     followed by Mouth. They stand on the EDGE of the hill.

     They are met with a SURPRISING SIGHT. BELOW the boys, on
     the opposite side of the hill, is a tiny AREA OF LAND. A
     MINI-PENNINSULA. Thrashing ocean waves and jutting rocks
     surround the grassy penninsula. A small CEMETARY is built
     on a small section of land. POTTER'S FIELD. Crowded with
     old, crooked, GRAVESTONES. Built BESIDE the cemetary is --


50   EXT. LIGHTHOUSE LOUNGE - DAY                                     50

     A rectangular, ONE STORY building. RUN DOWN. DISTORTED by
     the years. Its white wood exterior is CRACKED AND ROTTING.

     The building is CROOKED. Its windows TWISTED and DIRTY. A
     broken red and green NEON SIGN hangs over the building. A
     TALL, CROOKED LIGHTHOUSE is built beside the building. An
     OPEN-CLOSED sign hangs in the front door window. The heavy
     wind BLOWS the sign. SPINNING it around. We AREN'T CERTAIN
     if the place is open or closed. SHADOWS pass by the dirty
     windows. There is a SINISTER, EERIE quality to this place.

     Mikey STARES. In AWE. MUMBLING to himself, he excitedly
     looks at the map. But the map seems to END. Mikey is
     PUZZLED. He suddenly gets an idea. He FOLDS the map like a
     MAD MAGAZINE back cover. To Mikey's delight, the folded
     pieces form another MAP. Mikey REMOVES the doubloon from
     his pocket. When he PLACES the doubloon over the map,
     everything appears to be more CLEAR. He gets everyone's
     ATTENTION, pointing to the map.
                                                        40.


                  MIKEY
        See this -- here's where we are
        now.

Mikey POINTS to the "X" below the cliff. SMALL FOOTPRINTS
have been sketched on the map. They FORM a line from the
bottom of the hill to the "X".

                  MIKEY
        This is where the rich stuff’s
        buried --
             (POINTS back to house)
        Down there some place.

Mouth reads the SPANISH phrase written beside the
footprints.

                  MOUTH
        "Six times five, Stretching feet,
        To lowest point, Get the treat!"

The boys PAUSE. Figuring out the RIDDLE.

                  MIKEY
        Six times five. That's thirty.

                  DATA
        Stretching feet -- your feet
        stretch when you walk --

                  MIKEY
        I got it! If we walk 30 paces -- to
        the lowest point -- we'll get the
        treat -- the rich stuff!

                  CHUNK
             (gets a chill)
        I dunno -- it's gettin’ late -- My
        Mom's gonna be worried. Besides --
        what's that place doin' open in the
        fall? It's only a summer place.
        Seems pretty creepy to me.

The kids suddenly NOTICE something. They TURN to the
lounge. A DARK CAR pulls into the driveway. TWO TALL MEN,
wearing dark, business suits, get out. They WALK to the
restaurant door. They ENTER. Data TURNS to Chunk.

                  DATA
        See. There's nuthin' to be scared
        of. Two other customers are goin'
        in.
                                                           41.


                  CHUNK
        Maybe they ain't customers -- maybe
        they're drug dealers or somethin'.

                  DATA
        Drug dealers? Did you see their
        clothes? J.C. Penney Polyester.
        Drug dealers wouldn't be caught
        dead in those rags.

                  MIKEY
        Data, did you bring your
        binoculars?

Data is frantically searching for the right cord, wanting
to answer the call of duty. He mumbles to himself.

                  DATA
        Yeah -- binoculars -- binoculars --
             (finds the right cord,
             nods and screams)
        Spy Eyes!

Data pulls one of his CORDS’from beneath his shirt. A
mechanical device RAISES from Data's chest, with a pair of
cheap opera glasses attached to the end. The glasses stop
in front of Data’s eyes. But when he moves to look through
them, the glasses fly from their place and shoot forward.

Data gives a shrug. Mouth looks over Mikey's shoulder at
the map.

                  MOUTH
        So what made you think nobody ever
        followed this map before and made,
        off with whatever's buried there?

                  MIKEY
        They could've. But I never heard of
        anybody finding more stuff than
        alreadys in the museum. And anyway,
        to grownups, this is already worth
        enough. Some arky-logicalists dig
        up a map that's a bundha' years old
        -- they throw a wooden frame around
        it, hang it in a museum, and call
        it art.

                  MOUTH
                                                             42.


             Okay -- but, how're we s'posed to
             dig for anything? Knock on the
             door? Ask whoever's there --
             "S'cuse me -- mind if we wreck your
             floor?"

                       MIKEY
             Look. The place is obv'sly open for
             bizness -- We can pretend like
             we're cornin' in for somethin' to
             eat -- then joint the case.

                       CHUNK
             Wha--?

                       DATA
             He means, "case the joint".

     Mikey NODS. The others PAUSE. THINKING.

                                                         CUT TO:


51   EXT. LIGHTHOUSE - DAY                                         51

     The Goonies walking through the GRAVEYARD. Mikey LEADS them
     toward the "LIGHTHOUSE LOUNGE". Suddenly, a LOUD CRACKING
     SOUND is heard. Like a FIRECRACKER. Followed by ANOTHER.
     And ANOTHER. The boys FREEZE. SCARED. LOOKING AROUND.

                       CHUNK
             That sounded like gunshots. Not the
             big ones you hear in war movies,
             but real ones.

                       MIKEY
             Gunshots! Jeeeezzz -- Chunk, turn
             off your brain. Somebody probably
             dropped a pot in the kitchen!

     Mikey CONTINUES to move forward. The boys FOLLOW. They are
     now a little SHAKEN. Eyes DARTING back arid forth. A bit
     more cautious. They arrive at the front of the building.

     Mouth peers through the filthy FRONT DOOR windows. Mikey
     and Data walk to the side of the building. They try to LOOK
     into the windows. TOO HIGH. The boys spot a PILE of
     discarded ORANGE CRATES. They stand the orange crates on
     end. Climbing up onto them.
                                                                43.


     They PEER through the windows. Chunk WALKS to an outdoor
     soda machine that sits next to a closed garage. Chunk tries
     to peer into the garage, starts to open the door,
     INVESTIGATING IT.

     GOON KIDS P.O.V.

     A SHUT DOWN seafood restaurant. DARK. DUSTY. Seemingly
     DESERTED. Tattered FISH NETS, wooden OARS, stuffed FISH
     hang on the walls. Red VINYL BOOTHS line the walls. WOODEN
     TABLES fill the floor. A JUKEBOX sits in one comer.

     The goonies see TWO PEOPLE standing in the rear of the
     restaurant. In DARKNESS we can see only their shadows.

     They drag two long, limp, heavy objects into a back room.
     It is TOO DARK for us to see what the objects are.

     Once the two figures disappear, the goonies WALK to the
     restaurant's front door.


52   EXT. LIGHTHOUSE GARAGE - DAY                                     52

     Chunk PUSHES the garage door! The door flies OPEN! The
     orange slanted rays of a late day sun hit the black OFF
     ROAD VEHICLE, igniting it, over forty bullet holes, and a
     shattered rear window. CHUNK ALMOST DROPS DEAD. He RUNS to
     tell the guys, but they are already ENTERING the
     restaurant.


53   INT. LIGHTHOUSE LOUNGE - DAY                                     53

     The Goonies enter. Looking around. Everything is SILENT.
     DESERTED.

     Chunk races inside and starts pulling at everybody's
     clothing, trying to signal them with bizarre hand signs and
     wild descriptive gestures that make him look totally not of
     this earth. He finally gets out a FEW WORDS.

                       CHUNK
             Guys -- guys -- we gotta' get
             outta' here!! I just saw the --

     Chunk is INTERRUPTED by the SOUND OF A SLAMMING DOOR! The
     kids nearly JUMP out of their skin! They turn to the
     DIRECTION of the sound!
                                                        44.


The SHADOW of a person stands by the restaurant door. The
person has JUST CLOSED the door. They step FORWARD. INTO
THE LIGHT. IT IS MAMA FRATELLI! We immediately RECOGNIZE
HER from the earlier JAIL BREAK. She GLARES, at the boys.

                  MAMA
        How long you-hoys been at that
        window?

                  MOUTH
             (trembling)
        L-L-L-L-Long enough to see that
        this place needs about 400 Roach
        Motels.

Immediately, Mama takes a strong dislike to Mouth. Chunk is
in the background frantically signaling and mouthing don't
piss her off. She LEADS the boys to a table. She CALLS to
the back room.

                  MAMA
        Jake -- we got customers.

We hear a LOTTO THUMP from the back room. Followed by
Jake’s VOICE.

                  JAKE (O.S.)
        Whattayou mean customers!?! This
        ain't no rest--

Jake pokes his head out. He sees the KIDS. He PAUSES.
MUTTERING under his breath.

                  JAKE
        Shit.

Mama SNAPS her fingers at her son.

                  MAMA
        Now go on. Get in the kitchen. Warm
        up the stove.

Jake RELUCTANTLY walks to the kitchen. He walks PAST the
Goon kids. Jake GLARES down at the kids. Eyes filled with
ANGER. He enters the KITCHEN. The kids take their seats at
a CROOKED TABLE. It is IMPOSSIBLE to eat a meal at this
table. It is WOBBLY. DIRTY. STICKY. Set with filthy,
YELLOWED dishes and RUSTY silverware.
                                                           45.


Mikey LIFTS his fork. It is attached to the table by a
long, gooey WAD OF CHEWED GUM. Throughout this, Chunk is
trying to gesture and explain to the boys, but he is so
excited, ONLY AIR comes out. Mama TOWERS over the boys.
FROWNING down on them.

                  MAMA
        Okay -- we got a specialized menu
        here. We serve one thing. "Fresh
        Fish Surprise".

                  CHUNK
        What kinda fish?

                  MAMA
             (slamming her hand on the
             table)
        I said it's a surprise!

                  CHUNK
             (scared)
        Okay -- Okay I'll take it.

                  MAMA
        What about the rest of ya?

The other guys exchange NERVOUS glances.

                  MIKEY
        Just a glass of water for me.

Everyone follows Mikey and ORDERS WATER. Mama NODS.

                  MAMA
        Okay -- One surprise and five
        waters. 'Zat it?

                  MOUTH
             (out of extreme
             nervousness, forces an
             Italian accent)
        I’d like a' the Antipasto salad --
        the fettucini Alfredo -- the a Veal
        Scallopine -- and a bottle of
        Botticelli -- 1981.

An angry Mama LEANS toward Mouth. She GRABS his tongue.

BETWEEN HER fingers. PINCHING. She removes a POCKET KNIFE
from her pocket. She MOVES the blade to Mouth’s tongue.
Ready to CUT.

                  MAMA
                                                           46.


        We got one more thing on the menu -
        - TONGUE!
             (a menacing smile)
        You boys like tongue?

The boys all SHAKE THEIR HEADS. SCARED. Mama catches
herself. She MOVES the knife away. RELEASING her grip on
Mouth's tongue. Mama smiles falsely, and walks back to the
kitchen's SWINGING DOORS. Mouth COVERS his mouth. In PAIN.

Mikey GETS UP from his chair. He begins to LOOK AROUND.
SEARCHING for a spot on the floor, a trap door, anything
that would indicate a buried treasure. LOUD ARGUING IS
HEARD from the kitchen.

                  JAKE (O.S.)
        But, Ma -- this was s'posed to be
        our dinner --

                  MAMA (O.S.)
        Just shut up. Shut up and do what I
        told ya.

The boys at the table LOOK at each other. FRIGHTENED.

                  DATA
        What about those two guys who came
        in before us? What happened to
        them?

                  CHUNK
             (finally able to talk)
        Guys, look -- if we don’t get
        outta’ here now -- there’s gonna be
        some kinda’ hostage crisis --
             (out of breath, gesturing
             in a big whisper)
        Garage -- four wheel drive --
        bullet­holes the size of Big Macs -
        -

                  MOUTH
        Chunk, I’m startin’ to O.D. on all
        your bullshit stories.

A LOUD SOUND suddenly echoes through the place. CHURNING.
BUMPING. WHIRRING. It sounds like a WASHING MACHINE gone
BERSERK. The kids EXCHANGE a FRIGHTENED GLANCE. We hear the
voice of a man SCREAMING OBSCENITIES. On the far wall A
DOOR FLIES OPEN! A MAN STORMS OUT! It's FRANCIS FRATELLI.
                                                        47.


His clothes and body are SPLATTERED, STAINED by a DARK
GREEN INK. He is SCREAMING. BOILING MAD. He is YELLING
across the hallway to Mama, holding up his hand. A drawing
of Ullyses S. Grant has been STAMPED onto his hand.

                  FRANCIS
        How the hell am I s’posed to finish
        up downstairs -- with that piece of
        Smithsonian shit I got to work
        with?!

Francis sees the table of kids. STARING at him. Francis
PAUSES. STARTLED. He COVERS the stamp on his hand and
DASHES back through the door. As if he were caught doing
something WRONG. We hear him latching several LOCKS on the
door behind him. The boys exchange another MYSTERIOUS
GLANCE.

The KITCHEN DOORS SHOOT OPEN! Mama STRADDLES OUT! Carrying
a tray of GLASSES in one arm. The metal CLEAVE’R in the
other. The glasses are filled with RUSTY, ORANGE COLORED
WATER. Small PARTICLES float in the water. Mama DISTRIBUTES
a glass of water to each of the boys. They STARE at the
water’s ODD color.

                  MOUTH
        'Zis s’posed to be water?

                  MAMA
        It’s wet ain’t it?

                  DATA
             (nervous laugh)
        Yeah -- sure -- looks great.

                  MOUTH
        If ya' like drinkin' mule piss.

Mama TURNS to Mouth. RAGE in her eyes. Mouth starts pouring
his water from one glass to the other. It sounds a little
like going to the bathroom. This is driving Mikey crazy. He
starts to bounce up and down on his seat, knocking his
knees together. He excitedly whispers to Mouth.

                  MIKEY
        Cut it out, Mouth! This is the
        sorta place that has Daddy Long-
        legs in the restroom.
                                                        48.


The kitchen doors FLY OPEN again. Jake exits. He is wearing
APRONS. Covered with BLOOD. His hands and arms are also
STAINED with blood. He is carrying A HUGE STEAMING POT. A
ladel RESTS in the pot. He RESTS the pot on the table.
LOOKING at the boys.

                  JAKE
        Who ordered fish surprise?

Chunk nervously raises his hand. Jake ladels the GROTESQUE
contents of the pot into Chunk's plate. The fish surprise
is made up of a black, JELLIFIED LIQUID. Loaded with FISH
HEADS and BONES. Chunk FROWNS.

                  CHUNK
        Yummy.

Mama looks into the pot.

                  MAMA
        Is there some left?

Jake NODS. Mama CHECKS her wristwatch.

                  MAMA
        Time to feed your brother.

                  JAKE
        Let Francis do it -- I fed it last
        night.

                  MAMA
        Francis is busy.

                  JAKE
        I hate goin' down there, Ma. It --

                  MAMA
        He’s your brother.
             (pushes Jake)
        Now get goin. ’Fore it gets cold.

Jake RELUCTANTLY walks to a crooked wooden door. He OPENS
the door. It leads into DARKNESS. Jake ENTERS. We HEAR him
descend the creaky stairs. A nervous Mikey STANDS. BOUNCING
on one leg. He LOOKS at Mama.

                  MIKEY
        S’cuse me, M'am -- Where's the
        man's room?
                                                              49.


     With his usual wild hand gestures and expressions, Chunk is
     trying to convince Mikey NOT TO GO downstairs. Mama GLARES
     at Mikey.

                       MAMA
             Can't you hold it?

                       CHUNK
                  (agreeing with Mama)
             Yeah, Mikey -- can't you hold it?!

     Devilishly, Mouth pours a thin, noisy stream of water from
     one glass which he holds high above the other.

                       MIKEY
                  (beyond desperation)
             LADY -- PLEASE!!

                       MAMA
             Downstairs. To your right. And STAY
             to your right!!!

     Mikey NODS. TREMBLING. Chunk still tries to CONVINCE Mikey.

                       CHUNK
                  (whispering)
             Mikey -- Don't -- You can't --
             please --

     Mikey IGNORES Chunk and WALKS to the basement door. He
     ENTERS.


54   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT                                       54

     A NARROW corridor. DARK. TWISTING. Lined with DAMP, STONE
     WALLS. The stairs are made of ROTTED WOOD. They CREAK and
     GROAN with his every step. Mikey ARRIVES at the bottom.

     There is a LONG HALLWAY. DIMLY LIT by a few dangling BARE
     BULBS. Mikey removes the MAP from his pocket. He OPENS to
     the maze. Trying to find some sort of COMPARISON.

     He suddenly hears BIZARRE SOUNDS. GROWLING. SCREAMING. They
     echo from the hallway’s OPPOSITE SIDE. Mikey PAUSES.
     CURIOUS. He TURNS. He puts the map back INTO HIS POCKET.

     He FOLLOWS the sounds. They lead him to a THICK, WOODEN
     DOOR. At HALLWAY’S END. Mikey STOPS. The sounds are LOUDER
     here. More DISTINCT. The growling CONTINUES. Like an
     ANIMAL. It mixes with the RATTLING OF CHAINS. The door is
     OPEN. A CRACK. Mikey PEERS inside.
                                                              50.


55   INT. SLOTH’S ROOM                                              55

     MIKEY’S P.O.V. - A STONE ROOM. Resembling a JAIL CELL.

     The room is EMPTY. Save for a TATTERED, STAINED MATTRESS.
     It sits in.the MIDDLE of the floor. A very large person
     sits in a DARK CORNER. We will call him SLOTH. Only the
     LARGE OUTLINE of his shadow is visible. Jake stands OVER
     HIM.

     Holding the pot of FOOD. Sloth GROWLS at Jake. He HOLDS the
     pot out to SLOTH. Jake speaks as if he were talking to a
     DOG.

                       JAKE
             Here, boy -- You hungry? Want your
             supper?

     Sloth GRUNTS. He holds out TWO ARMS. They come INTO THE
     LIGHT. The arms are THICK, MUSCULAR. Covered with CURLY
     BROWN HAIR. TORN, FRAYED shirt sleeves hang from the arms.

     HEAVY METAL CHAINS are attached to his wrists. They SECURE
     Sloth to the wall. His arms STRETCH out for the food. Like
     a STARVING child. Mikey WATCHES. EYES WIDE. SHOCKED.

     Jake holds the pot INCHES from Sloth's fingers.

                       JAKE
             Here, fella -- this what you want?
             Your "Tender Vittles"?

     Sloth's hands try to GRAB the bowl. Jake PURPOSELY DROPS
     the pot. It SMASHES on the floor. The fish and broth are
     SUCKED into the dry cement. Sloth CRIES OUT. Mikey's eyes
     are SAD. SYMPATHETIC. Jake feigns PITY.

                       JAKE
             Oh, poor boy --
                  (shrugs)
             Sorry, fella. Maybe tomorrow night.

     Sloth WHIMPERS. With a SADISTIC GIGGLE, Jake turns to exit
     the room. Mikey quickly HIDES. BEHIND the door. Jake walks
     back UPSTAIRS. Mikey PEERS out from behind the door.

     Seeing that THE COAST IS CLEAR, he walks out. Mikey looks
     back INTO THE ROOM.

     CAMERA DOLLIES INTO MIKEY'S FACE.
                                                                51.


     He SEES SLOTH'S face. (But we don’t). Mikey's face goes
     WHITE. His eyes fill with TERROR. We hear Sloth GROWL at
     him. Mikey TURNS. He SPRINTS OFF down the hallway. He
     DASHES back upstairs. SCARED TO DEATH.


56   INT. LIGHTHOUSE LOUNGE - DAY                                     56

     Mikey RUSHES into the room. He RUNS into Brand's ARMS!

     Brand, dirtied and muddied from his bicycle accident, is
     STANDING in the restaurant. Brand GRABS Mikey's collar. He
     PICKS Mikey up off the floor. Brand GLARES at him.

                       BRAND
             Death's too good for you. I’m
             savin' you for Mom.

     Chunk has actually been eating some of the Fish Surprise,
     and has lost most, if not all, of his color.

                       CHUNK
             Can we go now, you guys? I think
             I'm gonna be sick.

     Mama WALKS back into the room, startling Brand with her
     malevolent presence. She LOOKS at all of the boys, ANXIOUS
     to get rid of them.

                       MAMA
             It's all right boys. Go on home.
             It's on the house.

     Chunk sticks his head under the table and BARFS.

                       MOUTH
             Now it's on the floor!

                       MAMA
             Go on, get out of here; Jake'll
             clean up. Now git.

     The boys almost knock the table over getting out of there
     as Mama fakes her politeness, then shuts the door and turns
     the "Closed" sign facing out.


57   EXT. GRAVEYARD - DUSK                                            57

     DARKNESS approaches. The goon kids are HIDING OUT here.

     Behind the TOMBSTONES. Mikey’s SCARED. Trying to EXPLAIN
     WHAT HE SAW.
                                                              52.


                       MIKEY
             I’m tellin’ ya' -- They got an "It"
             -- A giant "It" -- and they got it
             chained to the wall -- and when it,
             when it came into light --
                  (gives himself a shot of
                  Promotene Mist)
             Ya' shoulda’ seen it’s face -- it
             was horrible. All the parts were
             mixed around --

                       BRAND
             Like your brain, lame-o.
                  (trying to pull Mikey)
             Say goodbye to your little pals --

     Chunk points OFFSCREEN. Brand PAUSES, turning curiously to
     where Chunk points.


58   EXT. LIGHTHOUSE - DUSK                                         58

     GOONIE'S P.O.V. - JAKE and FRANCIS exit through a side
     door.

     Heads DARTING back and forth. Making sure that the COAST IS
     CLEAR. They are CARRYING a large, limp bag. The SIZE OF A -
     BODY. MAMA follows. CARRYING another similar bag. The Goon
     kids CURIOUSLY watch from behind the tombstones. The garage
     door opens, revealing the Black O.R.V.

                       CHUNK
             Lookit there! Lookit there!

     Jake OPENS the hatchback of the O.R.V. Jake OPENS a false
     FLOOR in the O.R.V.’s bed. He and Francis manage to FIT one
     bag onto the vehicle bed. They ATTEMPT to load the other
     bag. WON'T WORK. Not enough SPACE. Jake CLOSES the false
     floor. He and Francis CARRY the other bag BACK INSIDE the
     restaurant.

                       DATA
             Whattayou think they got in the
             bags?

     The kids have NO ANSWER.

     Jake and Francis come back OUTSIDE. They get INTO THE
     O.R.V. with Mama. They DRIVE OFF. The Lighthouse Lounge is
     EMPTY. Mikey excitedly LOOKS at the others.

                       MIKEY
             Hey -- the place is ours.
                                                        53.


                  CHUNK
             (scared)
        Our parents are gonna be worried!
        Let’s go home.

                  MIKEY
        What home? In a couple more hours
        it ain’t gonna be home anymore.
             (passionate)
        C’mon, guys. This is our time. Our
        last time to see if the rich
        stuff’s buried someplace in there.

Mikey PULLS the map from his pocket. He TRIES to read it.
TOO DARK. He LOOKS at the others.

                  MIKEY
        Anybody got a match?

SUDDENLY, A SMALL FLAME APPEARS. It ENTERS from OFF SCREEN
RIGHT. ANOTHER FLAME APPEARS. Entering from OFF SCREEN
LEFT. The flames are TWO MATCHES. HELD by ANDY and STEF.

Andy’s eyes TWINKLE in the firelight. But her hand is
SHAKING, her eyes DART from left to right. She is obviously
FRIGHTENED by the graveyard.

                  ANDY
        Hi, Brandy.

Brand SMILES at Andy, and LOOSENS his grip on Mikey. Stef
gives a NASTY smile to Mouth.

                  STEF
        Whatcha’ doin’ in the graveyard?
        Diggin’ up a new girlfriend?

                  MOUTH
        Don’t knock it. Stiffs are lots
        warmer than you.

Brand gives a PUZZLED look to Andy.

                  BRAND
        What're you doin’ here?

                  ANDY
        Followed you guys. We were out
        drivin’ with Troy -- He was bein’ a
        real spas-ass -- ya’ know, tiltin’
        the mirror so he could look down
        our shirts --
             (shrugs)
                                                          54.


        So I elbowed his lip.

Mikey still reads the map. MUMBLING to himself.

                  MIKEY
        Okay -- if it’s thirty paces- -
             (begins to count off the
             paces)
        One -- Two -- Three --

Data GRABS Mikey from behind, STOPPING him.

                  DATA
        No, Mikey! Your feet too small! We
        must do this scientifically!
             (removes calculator)

                  MOUTH
             (pushes Data out of the
             way)
        Paces are paces! Ya' think this
        Willy dude had a calculator?

Mouth TAKES OVER. Walking out the paces with LONGER
STRIDES. Moving TOWARD the lounge. Mouth counts out the
paces as ELMER FUDD.

                  MOUTH
        One -- Two -- Twee --
             (turns back to the
             others)
        Shhhh!- Be vewy, vewy quiet! I'm
        hunting wabbits! Hee hee hee hee!

Mouth CONTINUES walking. The kids FOLLOW. Andy LOOKS at
Brand.

                  ANDY
        Poor Troy. Guess he won't be makin'
        out with anybody for awhile. Am I
        goin' to miss that stuff!
             (gets a chill, to Brand)
        C'mon, Brandy. Let's get outta'
        here. Graveyards freak me out.

Brand suddenly REALIZES that this could be the best night
of his life. He TURNS to leave with Andy, but then realizes
he has another duty.

                  BRAND
        I can't leave without my brother --
        just hold on -- one second --
                                                                55.


     Andy ROLLS her eyes. Brand TAKES her hand, pulling Andy to
     the lounge with him. Mouth ARRIVES at the Lounge door.

     TRYING to open it. LOCKED. Mouth PAUSES. WHAT TO DO? An
     IDEA. He LOOKS back at Chunk. Mouth SMILES.

                       MOUTH
             Hey, Chunk -- got some naked
             Polaroids of your Mom takin' a
             bath. Wanna' buy ’em? Real cheap.

     RAGE fills Chunk's eyes. He COMES at Mouth. Like a
     LINEBACKER. Mouth DODGES out of the way. Chunk RAMS into
     the front door. WHAM! The door BREAKS OPEN! Chunk GETS to
     his feet. BRUSHING himself off. Mouth CACKLES.

                       MOUTH
             Thanks, Chunk.

     This FRIGHTENS Andy. She TURNS TO RUN.

                       ANDY
             I'm goin' home. You guys are gonna
             get in big trouble.

     She turns to RUN. Andy is met FACE TO FACE with a LARGE
     STONE GARGOYLE! She SCREAMS! The gargoyle sits ATOP a
     tombstone! Andy turns and RUNS BACK to Brand's arms.


59   INT. LIGHTHOUSE - DUSK                                           59

     The other goonies have ENTERED the place. Mouth is still
     COUNTING PACES. Back to his ELMER FUDD impression. He
     STRIDES across the restaurant floor.

                       MOUTH
             Twenty eight -- twenty nine --
             toity.
                  (Mouth stops)
             This is it! That wascally wabbit
             must be under here!

                       STEF
             You can stop auditioning to be
             popular. You don't impress me
             anymore.

                       MOUTH
             I'd rather dive into a swimming
             pool
             full of razor blades than impress
             you.
                                                             56.


                       MIKEY
                  (looking at map)
             We gotta get to the lowest spot.

                       BRAND
                  (pulling Mikey)
             We gotta get outta here!

                       MIKEY
                  (strugging)
             C'mon, Brand! What’s another couple
             minutes gonna hurt? What if we find
             somethin’? Huh?

     Mikey breaks away from Brand and hurriedly opens the
     basement door. He motions for the guys to follow.


60   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT - CORRIDOR - NIGHT                   60

     Mikey leads the goonies down the dark, narrow stairway into
     the basement. A distant SOUND is heard. The RATTLING OF
     CHAINS. A low GROWLING. The Kids pause, frightened.

                       STEF
             Chunk -- I hope that's your stomach
             --

                       MIKEY
             No. That's the "It”.

     Mikey continues to descend. The kids cautiously follow.
     Another GROWL roars through the basement. Louder, like an
     animal. The Kids stop again, scared. Chunk turns to Mikey.

                       CHUNK
             Sounds like "Kong".

                       MIKEY
             No -- Some of it's human.

     The kids continue down the stairs. They arrive at the
     bottom. Mikey pauses. He looks at the others.

                       MIKEY
             C'mon. Wanna see it?

     The kids shake their heads. "No Way".

                       MIKEY
             Don't worry. It's chained up.
                                                                57.


     Mikey leads the kids toward Sloth's door. The frightened
     kids stay close together. They move slowly, carefully,
     toward the door. Meanwhile, Andy grabs Brand's hand.

                       ANDY
             I don't wanna see it, Brand. I
             don't wanna see anything else but
             you. Stay with me, okay?

     Brand nods. He stays behind with Andy. They stand in front
     of another door. A moment alone. Andy is shivering. Brand
     puts his arms around her. She cuddles closer to him. Brand
     smiles to himself. Now's the time to make his move.

     Meanwhile, the Kids are only a few feet from the door. Eyes
     wide, scared to death. Mikey slowly reaches out. He grabs
     the doorknob. The Kids hold their breaths. Mikey twists the
     doorknob. Sloth's ROARING GROWL blasts from behind the
     door. Louder than ever! It sends a shudder through the
     hallway. The kids jump back.

     Brand, who is leaning to kiss Andy, inches from her lips is
     interrupted by the group of kids falling toward him. The
     kids fall into Andy and Brand through another door. The
     door bursts open. Everyone falls inside like dominoes.

     (Resembling the "State Room" scene from the Marx Brothers',
     "A Night at the Opera".)


61   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT - KITCHEN - NIGHT                       61

     The kids get to their feet. In the chaos, the doubloon has
     fallen from Mikey's pocket. It rolls on its side, along the
     floor. Chunk grabs it, seconds before the doubloon falls
     into a drain. Chunk pockets the doubloon.

     We are inside of a large stone room. At one time used as a
     kitchen. The room is equipped with a giant freezer, two
     large stainless steel sinks, a Sparklett's glass water
     cooler, a stove and a stone fireplace. A tiny flame still
     burns in the fireplace. The only object that seems out of
     place is a large, black metal printing press. The press is
     ancient, rusty. A small window sits above the press. A
     photo of the Fratelli's adorns the wall behind the press.

     The kids exchange a bewildered shrug. Chunk goes straight
     for the water cooler. Chunk moves his mouth beneath the
     tiny faucet. He turns on the faucet and lets the water
     stream into his open mouth.

     An excited Mikey grabs a fireplace poker. He finds a random
     spot in the center of the floor.
                                                        58.


                  MIKEY
        Guess this is as good a place as
        any to start diggin' --

Mikey raises the poker high in the air. He brings it down,
hard on the concrete floor. Wham! The poker doesn't make a
dent! Instead, it sends a reverberating slock through
Mikey's body. His teeth even begin to chatter.

Brand shakes his head.

                  BRAND
        You sure we’re not adopted? Are we
        from the same family?
             (glances to Andy, who
             desperately wants to
             leave)
        C'mon, Mikey -- you’re embarrassin’
        me. There’s nothin' buried under
        here. Damn it -- This is the 20th
        Century.

                  MOUTH
        Hey, I know how to get through the
        cement -- Put Hershey’s all over
        the floor -- let Chunk eat through
        it.

                  CHUNK
             (raising his head from
             beneath the faucet,
             angry)
        Okay, Mouth -- "That's all I can
        stands, and I can't stands no more
        -- ”

Chunk's sudden movement causes the Sparklett’s container to
tilt. It falls off its base and smashes to the floor into a
million pieces. The water flows across the floor trickling
into the open fireplace. Several seconds pass before the
water hits the fireplace bottom. Mikey pauses.

                    MIKEY
        Listen --

They listen to the slow trickle for a moment. Brand shrugs.

                    BRAND
        Big wow.

                    MIKEY
                                                           59.


        No -- It's deep -- There must be
        some kind of opening -- or
        passageway --

The kids dash to the fireplace. Brand pushes Mikey out of
the way and reaches down to pick up a log. He burns his
hand. Brand drops the log and lets out a yelp. Mikey looks
at Brand, shaking his head.

                  MIKEY
        Brand -- You sure we’re not
        adopted? Are we from the same
        family?
             (glances to Andy)
        C’mon -- You're embarassin' me.

Brand grumbles and takes off his shirt. He wraps his hands
with the shirt. He begins to remove the firey, hot logs
from the fireplace. When all of the logs are removed, only
a section of black, rusted steel grating remains. Brand
removes it. A few feet below, the fireplace floor is lined
with ancient bricks and pieces of rock and earth. Brand
shoves his foot into the fireplace. He begins to pounce on
the bricks, trying to break through.

Chunk is looking around. His eyes light. He’s discovered
the freezer. He mumbles to himself, smiling.

                  CHUNK
        Hmmm. Wonder if they got
        Chipwiches?

Chunk grabs the freezer handle. He pulls hard. It's jammed.
He pulls again. Still won’t budge.

Brand is stomping on the fireplace ground. It creaks,
cracks. The bricks crumbling. The kids curiously watch. He
gives a hard stomp to the ground. A loud CRACK! Brand's
foot shoots through up to his knee. An opening! The boys
help Brand out of the fireplace.

Suddenly, a loud noise rocks the room! Data has turned on
the printing press. A freshly printed sheet rolls out of
the press. The sheet is filled with perfectly printed
counterfeit fifty dollar bills.

                  DATA
        Hey, guys -- Check it out.

Everyone hurries to Data, save for Chunk. He is still
pulling at the freezer handle.

                  BRAND
                                                                60.


             Bogus bills.

                       MIKEY
             I knew those people were from the
             ozone.

     Stef romes upon a horrible realization. She grabs the photo
     from the wall.

                       STEF
             Oh, God -- I knew I recognized
             these faces — The Fratelli Mob!

     Still pulling at the jammed freezer, Chunk calls back to
     the boys.

                       CHUNK
             See! You guys never believe me! And
             now look what you got yourselves
             into--!

     Suddenly, the freezer handle snaps! The freezer door shoots
     open! A DEAD BODY stands there. Frozen, eyes wide open.
     It's one of the TWO MEN IN DARK SUITS who we saw enter the
     restaurant earlier. The man is bound and gagged. An FBI
     badge is pinned to his lapel. A bullethole is through his
     forehead. The stiff is halfway zipped into a green, plastic
     bag. The body falls forward. Chunk jumps back. The stiff
     hits the floor. Slam! The kids let out a simultaneous
     scream. They dash out of the room.


62   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT - HALLWAY - NIGHT                       62

     The goon kids run down the hallway, frightened. They hurry
     to the upstairs stairway.

     Suddenly, a noise. The kids stop. Dead in their tracks, at
     the foot of the stairs. Brand motions for them to "Shhh."
     We HEAR the sound of VOICES, familiar voices. Mama, Jake,
     Francis, back home. The kids pause. Breathless. WE HEAR the
     basement door creak open. The kids look up to the top of
     the stairs. The long, menacing shadows of Mama and the two
     boys appear on the wall, heading into the basement. The
     kids turn, sprinting to the counterfeit room.


63   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT - KITCHEN - NIGHT                       63

     The kids run back inside, panicked. Mikey uses his
     Promotene Mist. Chunk is scared to death.

                       CHUNK
                                                        61.


        Mommy! Daddy! Uncle Wormer--!

                  ANDY
        Oh, Jesus! Oh, Jesus!

Andy crosses herself. Chunk sees this, tries to cross
himself and instead outlines a Star of David over his
entire chest and stomach.

                  MOUTH
        What’re you doing?

                  CHUNK
             (hysyterically)
        I'm not supposed to do the cross --
        I'm Jewish! I'm doing the Star --
        it's got 6 points -- it --

                  BRAND
        What do we do?

                  MIKEY
        Put him back in the freezer.’ Put
        'em back!

Mikey and the goonies rush over to help. Chunk who is
already lifting the body to put it back up. Chunk stands in
front of the body. The kids stand in back, lifting it up.

The voices of Mama and the boys are getting closer.

                  ANDY
             (crying & whispering her
             panic)
        Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord
        is with thee. Hail Mary, full of
        grace, the Lord is with thee.

                  STEF
        He's so cold! Andy, help us!

                  ANDY
             (frozen stiff)
        Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord
        is with thee!!

The kids lift the body to its feet. They hurriedly push it
into the freezer. The clumsy Chunk still stands in front of
the body. He is pushed into the freezer with the body. The
kids close and latch the freezer door. They run to the
fireplace.
                                                              62.


64   INT. FREEZER                                                   64

     Chunk is frozen, face to chest with the corpse. He tries to
     scream for help. He's too scared. Speechless. The corpse
     begins to slide down Chunk's body until it is face to face
     with him.


65   INT. KITCHEN - NIGHT                                           65

     Mikey leads everyone into the fireplace. He kicks away a
     few loose boards. Mikey grabs one of the fireplace tools; a
     metal shovel. He motions for the kids to crawl into the
     fireplace. One by one, the kids hurriedly crawl into the
     passageway. Brand is hesitant.

                       BRAND
             Geez -- Looks kinda small --

                       MIKEY
             Oh, yeah? Like the elevator.
             Remember?

                       BRAND
                  (scared)
             I told you to shut up about that --

     Brand is interrupted by Mama and the Boy's voices, getting
     closer, clearer. He quickly crawls into the fireplace.
     Mikey is the last to crawl inside. He gathers the grating
     and logs. Once inside the fireplace, Mikey puts the grating
     and logs back in place, over his head. Mama and the boys
     enter.


66   INT. FIREPLACE                                                 66

     Using Andy's lighter, Mikey restarts the fire over his
     head.


67   INT. KITCHEN                                                   67

     Jake moves to open the freezer door, but Mama spots the
     broken water cooler. Things are not as they left them. Mama
     snaps at the others.

                       MAMA
             Let's go check your brother.

     Jake moves from the freezer. Mama and the boys hurry out of
     the room. We HEAR Mama's voice:
                                                                63.


                       MAMA (O.S.)
             He better not've busted them chains
             again. I ain't goin' back to the
             zoo for another set.

     The goonies watch through the fireplace grating. Suddenly,
     the freezer door slowly opens. Chunk steps out from behind
     the corpse. He dashes to the fireplace. He whispers to the
     kids:

                       CHUNK
             C'mon, guys! Lemme in! Lemme in!

                       MIKEY
                  (whispers back)
             No! You gotta get out! Get the
             police!

     Chunk HEARS the Fratelli's coming back. He spots the window
     above the printing press. Chunk leaps the top of the press,
     crawling out of the tiny window. Just as Chunk slips out of
     the window, Mama and the boys re-enter the room.

                       MAMA
             I knew he couldn’t break those
             chains --

                       JAKE
             Maybe it was one a' them tremors,
             Ma --

                       FRANCIS
             Yeah. Ya' know how the ocean
             sometimes shakes up the place --

     Mama shrugs. No time for thinking. There’s work to do. She
     points to the freezer.

                       MAMA
             C'mon. We gotta move the other one.

     The boys nod. Jake opens the freezer door. They begin to
     move the corpse. Mama looks at the boys.

                       MAMA
             You boys take care a’ that. I’m
             gonna stay behind -- Make sure none
             a’ them "tremor” start up again.


68   INT. FIREPLACE                                                   68
                                                             64.


     The kids move away from the grating. They climb back into
     the passageway.


69   INT. PASSAGEWAY - UNDERNEATH LIGHTHOUSE                       69

     A narrow, man-made tunnel, surrounded by smooth rocks and
     hard earth. The tunnel moves downward. Getting wide, larger
     as it moves further in the distance, but there is only
     dar&ness ahead. The goon kids cluster tighter together,
     whispering, scared to death.

                       ANDY
             Oh, my God -- I saw my first dead
             body.

                       BRAND
             Okay, look guys -- I’m the oldest.
             I’ll call the shots.
                  (a pause)
             We gotta look for a way out --
             start looking for manholes!

                       MIKEY
                  (to Data)
             Hey, you got any light on you?

     Data opens his shirt, searching for the correct cord.

                       DATA
             Yeah -- In case of emergencies --
             when I’m walking home from school
             and some big guys stop me -- They
             say, "Goony, we're gonna dust you!"
             -- I pretend like I’m real scared -
             - then I reach inside and pull this
             cord and say --
                  (Screams)
             BULLY BLINDERS!!!

     Two bright 8mm movie projector lamps extend from Data's
     hips. They flip on, causing incredibly bright light. The
     goonies all cover their eyes and scream. But suddenly, the
     lights fizzle out. Data shrugs.

                       DATA
             Only problem -- batteries don’t
             live so long.
                  (reaches into backpack)
             So -- I have Father’s backyard
             light.
                                                             65.


     He removes a large lantern. He flips it on. It illuminates
     the passageway. Brand grabs it.

                       BRAND
             Okay -- I’ll walk ahead with the
             light --

                       MOUTH
             Walk?! What about -- RUN!

     All of the kids run off into the passageway.

                                                         CUT TO:


70   EXT. ROAD - NIGHT                                             70

     Chunk is running for his life. He runs to the side of the
     road, headed back to town. Suddenly, bright headlights come
     toward him. Chunk turns. He steps into the middle of the
     road. He waves his arms, hoping to flag down the car.

     The car comes to a stop. Bright headlights shine in Chunk's
     eyes, blinding everything in front'of him. A MAN steps out
     of the car. We can only SEE the outline of his shadow. He
     speaks to Chunk.

                       MAN
                  (Jake Fratelli)
             Is there something wrong?

                       CHUNK
                  (panicked)
             Look, Mister -- I need a ride -- My
             friends and I just had a run in
             with these really gross people --
             Ya' mighta heard of 'em- - The
             Fratelli’s. Anyway, we found their
             hideout! If you could gimmee' a
             ride to the Police station --

     The Man motions for Chunk to step forward. Chunk hurries to
     the Man. Chunk walks through the blinding headlights.

     He can finally see the car. His face goes white. It’s the
     black off-road-vehicle, lined with countless bulletholes.

     Chunk looks up at the man’s face. It's Jake Fratelli.
                                                             66.


     Chunk turns to run. Jake grabs him around the waist. He
     carries the struggling, screaming Chunk to the rear of the
     O.R.V. Jake opens the false floor. Jake forces Chunk
     inside. Jake closes and locks the floor. He gets into the
     O.R.V. Francis is also here. He and Jake drive off.


71   INT. REAR COMPARTMENT OF O.R.V.                               71

     Chunk again lies face to face with the FBI corpse. Chunk is
     frozen with fear.


72   INT. TUNNEL UNDER WATER PIPES - NIGHT                         72

     Brand moves forward, holding the lantern. The light guides
     them through the dark tunnel.

     The kids round a corner and come upon an odd sight. A large
     cluster of twisting metal pipes runs along the cavern
     ceiling. The rusted pipes dangle a few feet. They are
     obviously connected to something several feet above the
     surface. Warm and cold light seeps down from the surface
     surrounding the pipes. Stef nudges Mouth.

                       STEF
             Your old man's a plumber. What
             kinda pipes are those?

                       MOUTH
             Gas pipes, electrical, sewage,
             plumbing, hot water, cold water,
             pressure pipes.

                       BRAND
             Water pipes? Hey -- You think if we
             started bangin' on 'em -- somebody
             upstairs might hear?

     Mouth gives a nod. He pulls a wrench from his pocket. The
     other kids pick up rocks from the ground. They begin to rap
     on the pipes.

                                                         CUT TO:


73   EXT. HILLSIDE COUNTRY CLUB - NIGHT                            73

     The Hillside Resident's private club.


74   INT. TUNNEL UNDER WATER PIRES                                 74
                                                               67.


     The kids are going wild; swinging, hanging from the pipes,
     using all of their adolescent, athletic abilities. Brand
     hangs upside down from one of the pipes. Andy swings from
     pipe to pipe, not unlike a gymnasium's parallel bars.

     Mouth words hard at unscrewing one particular pipe.


75   INT. COUNTRY CLUB - SHOWERS                                     75

     THREE overweight, pink, CLUB MEMBERS are taking a shower.


76   INT. TUNNEL UNDER WATER PIPES                                   76

     The kids still pull and swing from the pipes. The pipes are
     twisted and tangled out of proportion, leaking and spewing
     water. The pipes begin to move by themselves -- Like slowly
     moving pistons on an ocean vessel.


77   INT. COUNTRY CLUB - SHOWERS                                     77

     A MAN reaches out to turn down the cold water. Before his
     hand can touch it, the spigot is pulled into the wall! He
     pauses, puzzled. He reaches out for the hot water spigot.

     WHOOSH! It is sucked into the wall. The Man steps back,
     frightened. The shower head and nozzle above him is pulled
     into the wall. He looks around.

     Suddenly, one by one, all of the shower heads disappear
     into the wall! The confused members stare at the wall,
     their bloated bodies covered with soap.

     Suddenly, a fecid brown backwash explodes from the holes in
     the tile, where the spigots once were. The backwash covers
     the bodies of the club members. They dash out of the shower
     room, scared to death.


78   EXT. PUTTING GREEN - NIGHT                                      78

     A TENNIS PLAYER pauses, getting a drink from a court
     fountain. The player moves his lips to the fountain. The
     entire fountain is pulled down a few inches. The puzzled
     player bends lower. The fountain is pulled down a few more
     inches. The player again bends lower. The fountain suddenly
     shoots upward, knocking in the the player’s chin! The
     player hits the ground, out cold.


79   INT. TUNNEL UNDER WATER PIPES                                   79
                                                             68.


     The pipes are a moving, tangled mess of leaking, spraying
     water. Several shower nozzles, water fountains and various
     spigots have been pulled underground. But the kids still
     have not given up, still thinking they’ve had no contact
     with the outer world.

     Suddenly, all of the pipes begin to move faster, bouncing,
     becoming violent. Steam and water HISS and spray.

                       STEF
                  (yelling over noise)
             What1s happening?

                       MOUTH
                  (yelling over)
             REVERSE PRESSURE!!! LET’S GET OUTTA
             HERE!!!


80   INT. COUNTRY CLUB - MEN’S ROOM                                80

     Troy goes into a stall as a low rumbling c"an be heard. He
     drops his pants and sits down on the commode. Immediately,
     an explosion of toilet water blasts Troy off his seat,
     sending him crashing all the way up to the ceiling.


81   INT. TUNNEL UNDER WATER PIPES                                 81

     The kids walk away defeated, out of breath, sweating. Brand
     shakes his head.

                       BRAND
             Geez. Ya think somebody woulda
             noticed.

                                                         CUT TO:


82   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT - KITCHEN - NIGHT                    82

     CLOSE UP - Hamilton Beach blender. A hand comes into frame
     holding a large eggplant. The eggplant is placed into the
     blender. The blender "LIQUIFY" switch is hit.

     The eggplant is pushed into the blender. The eggplant is
     crushed, turned to mush from the bottom to the top. We HEAR
     Mama’s VOICE OVER as the eggplant is crushed:

                       MAMA (V.O.)
                                                           69.


        First we’ll start with your pudgy
        little fingers -- Then your round
        little hands -- then your fleshy
        arm --

CAMERA PULLS BACK. We are in the Fratelli basement.

Francis is holding the eggplant and controlling the
blender. Jake is holding a gun to Chunk’s head. Chunk is
nervous, sweating, tied to a chair by an extension cord.

Mama stands in front of Chunk, spewing out threats. Mama
nods for Sal to turn off the blender. Mama looks back at
Chunk.

                  MAMA
        Now -- you gonna tell me where your
        little friends are?

                  CHUNK
             (immediately, without
             hesitation)
        In the fireplace!

                  MAMA
             (slaps him)
        Don’t lie to me, boy!

                  CHUNK
        Honest -- We got this map from
        Mikey’s dad -- said that underneath
        this place -- there's buried
        treasure --

                  JAKE
        Don't give us any a' your bullshit
        stories --
             (shaking him)
        We want the truth! Spill your guts!
        Tell us everything! EVERYTHING!

                  CHUNK
             (hysterical, blabbering,
             exploding like a bullet)
        Okay -- okay -- in third grade, I
        cheated on my History exam- - In
        fourth grade, I stole my uncle's
        toupee and glued it on my face when
        I played one of the Wise Men in our
        school Christmas play -- In fifth
        grade, I pushed my brother down the
        stairs and blamed the dog -- I --
                                                             70.


     Mama and the boys just look at each other. They can't even
     get a word in.

                                                         CUT TO:


83   INT. CHESTER COPPERPOT TUNNEL                                 83

     CLOSE UP - PASSAGEWAY FLOOR - TRACKING SHOT. A light beam
     illuminates the uneven floor, covered with jutting rocks
     and sudden inclines and declines. We SEE a gum wrapper, a
     metal cigar tube, and a mildewed, dog-eared Bible scattered
     across the ground. CAMERA PULLS BACK.

     We SEE the goonies making their way through the passageway.
     They are still incredibly frightened. Andy is still
     muttering her prayers. Mikey picks up the discarded gum
     wrapper.

                       MIKEY
             Uh-oh -- Maybe somebody else was
             here before us --

                       DATA
                  (looking around)
             Maybe they're still here --

                       STEF
                  (getting a chill)
             Maybe we better hope they're not!!

                        ANDY
                   (scared, blabbering)
             Ten minutes ago Troy was looking
             down my shirt. There's nothing
             wrong with that, is there? If I
             hadn’t acted so vain, I'd still be
             cruising the coast with Troy. I
             have a terrific body -- why
             shouldn't boys look all they want -
             -I mean -- how many more years do I
             get before I -- before I --
                   (her face goes white, she
                   screams out)
             -- before I start looking like
             HIM!!

     CAMERA PANS to where Andy is pointing. A decayed skeleton
     is lying on the floor. Its legs are trapped under a giant
     boulder. Mikey looks up to the ceiling. He SEES a length of
     boulders, hanging from chains on the ceiling. The skeleton
     was obviously a victim of some sort of booby trap. Mikey
     suddenly makes the realization. He talks to himself.
                                                           71.


                  MIKEY
        You did this, One Eyed Willy --
        Didn't you? This is one a' your
        tricks -- You wouldn't a gone to
        all this trouble unless you were
        hidin' something' -- would you,
        Willy?

The other goonies slowly gather around the miner's body.

The skeleton is dressed in miner's clothes. He is wearing a
miner’s hat, and equipped with several tools: Shovels,
picks, hoes, etc. The goonies stare in shock, frightened.

Mikey opens his map to look for a way out. The other kids
move toward the body. Data makes a realization.

                  DATA
        This must be Chester Copperpot --

                  STEF
        Who?

                  DATA
        The last guy who went lookin' for
        the rich stuff -- They say he went
        in but never came out -- that was
        back in 1935 --

                  BRAND
             (to Mouth)
        Find his wallet.

                  MOUTH
        I ain't findin' his wallet.
             (pushes Stef)
        YOU find his wallet!

Stef sighs and decides to look for the wallet, she slowly
reaches into the skeleton's trousers. She removes the
wallet, but the skeleton’s hand lodges on the wallet. Stef
tries to pull the wallet. But the skeleton hand pulls back.
A tug of war. Stef finally breaks the wallet free.

She opens it and checks the name. It reads: CHESTER
COPPERPOT. The kids look at each other, frightened.

                  DATA
        Oh, God -- if he didn't make it out
        -- And he was s’posed to be an
        expert! What about us?!
                                                           72.


Data walks BEHIND everyone. He pulls a cord on his chest
and a couple dozen small red items automatically pop out
into his hand. Mikey NOTICES. He LOOKS at Data.

                  MIKEY
        What're you doin'?

                  DATA
        I'm setting booby traps. In case
        anybody follows us. We'll hear 'em
        comin'.

Mikey SUDDENLY notices something hanging around the
skeleton's neck, a sort of MEDALLION. Mikey GRABS the
medallion and studies it. It is an ANCIENT COPPER item,
shaped like a skull! There are THREE IRREGULARLY CUT HOLES
in the medallion, at the points where the skeleton's EYES
and NOSE would be located. Mikey STARES at the medallion,
trying to COMPARE it to the map.

Meanwhile, Data spots ROAD FLARES in Copperpot's backpack.
Data REACHES in and begins to PULL OUT each one of the ROAD
FLARES. But Data doesn't NOTICE that he also REMOVES ONE
STICK OF DYNAMITE! He PLACES it with the other flares and
inserts them into his backpack.

Andy is SCARED TO DEATH! She WANTS OUT! She BEGINS TO RUN
FORWARD!

                  ANDY
        Let's get outta' here! Come on!
        Let’s keep moving!

Andy SHOOTS FORWARD. Mikey LOOKS UP! He SEES that about TWO
INCHES from the ground, ALONG THE LOWER WALLS, are
CAREFULLY PLACED TREE BRANCHES! The branches are a SORT OF
TRIGGER! When broken, they CAUSE THE BOULDERS ABOVE TO
FALL! MIKEY SHOUTS!

                  MIKEY
        Andy! Stop!!

But it’s TOO LATE! Andy'S FOOT SNAPS A BRANCH! A CREAKING
SOUND is heard! The BOULDERS ABOVE begin to WAVER! In a
tremendous PANIC, the kids DASH FORWARD! They SNAP EACH
BRANCH, causing the boulders to FALL BEHIND THEM! ONE BY
ONE! Each boulder. JUST MISSING the kids by a hair! The
kids MAKE IT to the far wall as the last boulder DROPS
BEHIND THEM! They CLUSTER TOGETHER! SCARED OUT OF THEIR
WITS!
                                                           73.


The kids turn, STANDING at a virtual DEAD END! A SMALL
CIRCULAR BOULDER sits in the middle. The kids PAUSE.
LISTENING. They hear NOISES. BEHIND the boulder. Stef is
EXCITED.

                  STEF
        Listen! Somethin's behind here!

                  ANDY
             (hopefully)
        Maybe it's a way out!

The kids attempt to move the boulder. Brand PUSHES everyone
out of the way. He gives a MACHO raise of the eyebrow to
Andy. He'll do it HIMSELF. Brand REMOVES his shirt. He
flexes his MUSCLES. Andy BLUSHES. Mouth whispers to Data.

                  MOUTH
        Lookit 'im! Showin' off his Andy-
        pects and Andy-ceps!

In the background, Mikey TRIES to make a muscle. But
NOTHING happens. He frowns. Brand GRABS hold of the boulder
and begins to PULL WITH ALL HIS STRENGTH. GRUNTING.
GROANING. The boulder begins to MOVE. The crumbling sound
of rock is HEARD. Mikey watches, PROUD of his brother. Andy
STARES at Brand's muscular body. Brand finally manages to
PULL OUT THE BOULDER! The kids CONGRATULATE and APPLAUD
Brand. The kids POKE their heads INTO THE NEW OPENING.
There, is NOTHING BUT DARKNESS! But there is that SOUND --
it is the sound of SQUEAKING, FLAPPING WINGS. The kids LOOK
at each other. PUZZLED. FRIGHTENED.

Brand leans his head into the hole, craning it as far
forward as he possibly can, stretching his eyeballs to see
in the dark.

                  BRAND
        Hello! Hello! Anybody home?

A screech and a whistling sound, and then a black winged
creature with sharp teeth and red eyes explodes into
camera!

                  EVERYONE
             (yells)
        BATS!!!!

HUNDREDS OF BATS BLAST PAST THE KIDS! The bats ATTACK!
FRENZIED! Pulling at HAIR! Clutching ONTO clothes! Everyone
SCREAMS! Arms WAVING! HELPLESS! The kids DUCK FOR COVER!
The bats MOVE ON back through the passageway.
                                                               74.


     THE BATS RACING through the PASSAGEWAY, in the same
     direction the kids came from. The creatures move like a
     BLACK CLOUD OF LOCUSTS!

                                                         CUT TO:


84   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT KITCHEN                                84

     Chunk is CRYING his eyes out. TEARS streaming down his
     face. Mama and the boys are LISTENING. FASCINATED. He makes
     one last hysterical CONFESSION.

                       CHUNK
             But the worst thing -- the worst
             thing I ever don -- I mixed up this
             fake puke at home -- I went into
             this movie theater -- hid the puke
             in my jacket -- climbed into the
             balcony and -- and -- I made a
             sound like this
                  (makes VOMITING sound)
             Then I dumped it over the side --
             on all the people in the audience -
             - then -- then the people started
             gettin’ sick—throwin' up all over
             each other --
                  (bursts into tears)
             It was horrible -- I never felt so
             bad in all my life --

     Mama SQUEEZES the fat on Chunk's double chin. HARD. Mama's
     eyes are filled with FURY. She STARES at Chunk.

                       MAMA
             Look, kid -- I still ain’t heard
             what I wanted
                  (a beat)
             Now where are your friends?

                       CHUNK
             I told ya' -- in the fireplace --
             they ' took out the logs -- then
             the grating -- then they crawled
             into some secret passageway --

                       MAMA
                  (sarcastic)
             Then they put the grating and the
             logs back -- and started up the
             fire from inside --

                       CHUNK
                                                                75.


             Yeah- - right -- just like that.

     Mama RELEASES her grip. DISGUSTED. She turns to FRANCIS.

                       MAMA
             Hit "Puree".

     Francis grabs the BLENDER. He hits the "Puree" BUTTON. The
     blender starts with a DEADLY WHIRRR! Mama LOOKS at Chunk.

                       MAMA
             Now -- do I get the truth? Or do
             you get juiced?

     Chunk stares in HORROR. Mama NODS to Jake. He GRABS Chunk's
     hand. FORCING it to the top of the blender. Chunk SCREAMS.
     CRYING. HYSTERICAL. Jake begins to PUSH Chunk's fingers
     toward the SHARP, SWIRLING BLADES. Chunk STRUGGLES. MAMA
     HOLDS HIM DOWN. CHUNK’S FINGERS ARE LESS THAN AN INCH FROM
     THE BLADES.

     Suddenly, A NOISE. Coming from the FIREPLACE. Everyone
     TURNS. The logs literally BLAST from the fireplace. The
     grating POPS OUT. BOUNCING across the floor. THE BATS shoot
     out of the fireplace. They fly THROUGH the room.

     The bats fly UPWARD. Where it’s DARKER. They CLUSTER
     TOGETHER. ON THE CEILING. Francis RUSHES to the fireplace.
     He PEERS into the opening.

                       FRANCIS
             Kid’s not shittin’.

                                                         CUT TO:


85   INT. CAVERN UNDER ZOO - NIGHT                                    85

     The kids STAND in the passageway, on top of each other's
     SHOULDERS. They have formed a PERFECT CHEERLEADER PYRAMID,
     in order to REACH the ceiling.

     Mikey is HOLDING Chester Copperpot’s SHOVEL. He DIGS into
     the ceiling. CLUMPS of dirt begin to fall to the ground.
     Andy SHOUTS to everyone.

                       ANDY
             Okay, everybody -- we made a
             perfect Touchdown Victory Formation
             Pyramid. Don’t make a move of we'll
             tip over.
                                                               76.


     With a LITTLE effort, Mikey's shovel SHOOTS THROUGH the
     ceiling. He SMILES and CALLS to those below him.

                       MIKEY
             Hey -- we're pretty close to the
             surface!

                                                         CUT TO:


86   EXT. CAULDRON POINT 200 - NIGHT                                 86

     CLOSE UP - A SIGN. CAMERA PANS from the sign to a fenced
     grassy area. TWO GORILLAS, B0N20 AND BERTHA are cavorting
     about. BONZO drives a little red convertible pedal car, as
     he shows off for BERTHA who looks sweet and demure with a
     little pink ribbon the zookeepers have put in her hair.


87   INT. CAVERN UNDER ZOO                                           87

     Mikey CONTINUES to DIG through the ceiling. CLUMPS of dirt
     FALL.


88   EXT. CAULDRON POINT ZOO - NIGHT                                 88

     Bonzo gets out of his pedalcar and begins to groom Bertha.
     Bertha grooms back. Bonzo has that look in his eye. The
     look of a guy ready to "score". He immediately moves around
     to the back of Bertha, who reacts with mock, ladylike
     surprise.

     CLOSE - BONZO'S FEET. The shovel digs-through, missing
     Bonzo's foot by inches.

     CLOSE - BONZO. Making his move! He MOUNTS Bertha -- a
     moment later the ground opens up and BONZO is sucked
     underground and out of sight. BERTHA almost speaks -- she
     says -- "HUH?"


89   INT. CAVERN UNDER ZOO                                           89

     The GORILLA FALLS to the ground. SLAM! The pyramid
     COLLAPSES. The shocked kids SCREAM. Bonzo gets to his feet.
     CATCHING his breath. The Gorilla SEES the kids. He looks up
     and remembers what he was doing. He GROWLS. The kids TURN
     and RUN. Dashing FURTHER OFF into the tunnel!

     Outraged, Bonzo CLIMBS back up through the hole, back into
     his cage.
                                                                77.


90   INT. LIGHTHOUSE BASEMENT KITCHEN - NIGHT                         90

     CLOSE UP - KITCHEN CUPBOARD DOOR.

     The door OPENS. What should be filled with kitchen
     utensils, is filled with GUNS. ALL TYPES. PISTOLS.

     RIFLES. MAGNUMS. CAMERA PULLS BACK. Mama grabs a PISTOL.
     She looks at the BOYS.

                       MAMA
             If we find those kids, -- remember,
             no witnesses.
                  (CLICKS pistol)
             We'll let the air outta’ their
             Calvins.

     Chunk STARES. FRIGHTENED by what he's heard. Mama POINTS
     the pistol at Chunk's forehead. Ready to SHOOT. She PAUSES.
     MOVING the gun.

                        MAMA
             Maybe I better keep 'im alive --
             just in case he's lyin'.
                  (SNAPS her fingers at
                  Jake)
             Put 'im in with yer' brother.

     Chunk gives a NERVOUS NOD. Jakes LIFTS Chunk and the chair.
     Something FALLS OUT of Chunk's pocket. The DOUBLOON. It
     HITS the floor. Mama GRABS it. She STUDIES it. PUZZLED. She
     LOOKS at Chunk.

                       MAMA
             What's this? A Cracker Jack prize?

                       CHUNK
             We found that on the map -- it's
             got somethin' to do with the buried
             treasure --

     Mama is still PUZZLED. She HOLDS the doubloon out to
     Francis.

                       MAMA
             You’re s'posed to be an expert --

     Francis takes the doubloon. STUDYING it. His eyes get WIDE.
     His mouth DROPS OPEN. Total SHOCK.

                       FRANCIS
             Oh -- My -- God.
                                                             78.


     Mama and the boys shoot him a PUZZLED look.

                                                         CUT TO:


91   INT. TUNNEL LEADING TO BOTTOM OF WISHING WELL                 91

     The passageway is EXTREMELY SMALL, TIGHT, forcing the kids
     to CRAWL THROUGH. The passageway continues to get LOWER.

     Becoming SMALLER. NARROWER. BRAND still LEADS. HOLDING the
     flashlight. Brand is covered with SWEAT. Extremely NERVOUS.
     Suddenly, the flashlight beam begins to BLINK. DYING OUT.
     Brand PANICS to Data.

                       BRAND
             Hey! What’s goin’ on?!? This
             thing’s losin' juice! What're we
             gonna do about light?!--

     Data REACHES into his backpack. He FUMBLES in the darkness
     through the ROAD FLARES he lifted from Chester Copperpot.

     Data's fingers pass over the STICK OF DYNAMITE, and instead
     grab a FLARE. Data LIGHTS the flare and PASSES it to Brand.
     Brand STILL COMPLAINS.

                       BRAND.
             All we keep doin' is goin’ lower!
             Where we goin'?-- Where's this
             leadin' us?-- this place is gettin’
             awful small! Awful small!--

                       MIKEY
                  (whispers co Andy)
             Uh-oh. He’s gettin' that elevator
             look in his eyes.

                       ANDY
             Whattayou mean, "elevator"?

     Mikey takes advantage of the situation and moves even
     CLOSER to Andy. As he explains to her, he SMELLS her
     perfume and the shampoo rinse in her hair.

                       MIKEY
             Me and Brand got stuck in this
             elevator once. For five hours. It
             was okay at first -- then he
             started gettin' closet --
             closetphotos --

                       ANDY
                                                        79.


        Claustrophobic.

                  MIKEY
        Yeah. And he freaked out. Lost
        total control. Started spinnin'
        around in circles. His arms
        whippin' around. Like a breakdancer
        on fast forward. I had to climb on
        the elevator roof so I wouldn’t get
        hurt --

                  BRAND
             (screams)
        I can’t breathe! I’m chokin’!
        Mikey! Gimmee' your misty stuff!
        C’mon, man! Now!

Mikey gives Brand the PROMOTENE MIST. Brand GRABS it.
Sucking up the PRECIOUS mist. Mikey again WHISPERS to Andy.

                  MIKEY
        Last time he used that was in the
        elevator.
             (serious, trying to be
             strong)
        Andy -- this might get rough. You
        better let me take your hand.

Andy TAKES Mikey’s hand. The passageway has gotten WIDER.

The kids can now walk UPRIGHT. The kids ROUND a comer and
have made it to a POOL OF WATER. The water comes up to
their ANKLES. Mikey HOLDS the map above water. He suddenly
notices piles of glistening SILVER and COPPER COINS,
surrounding the edge of the walls. Mikey SMILES, as if his
prayers were answered. Struck with goldfever, Mikey DASHES
out ahead of everyone.

                  MIKEY
        We found it! We’re rich!!!

Mikey falls to his HANDS AND KNEES in a shaft of cool
exterior moonlight from far above. Brand takes several DEEP
BREATHS, taking in the sudden burst of FRESH AIR from
above. He starts PICKING UP all the coins in a one inch
pool of dirty water.

                  DATA
        What year was that map made?

                  MOUTH
             (looking through coins)
                                                                80.


             Couple hundred years before Abe
             Lincoln -- uh -- George Washington
             -- Thomas Jefferson -- Martin Sheen
             --

                       STEF
             That's President Kennedy, crater
             face. We must be at the bottom of a
             wishing well or somethin’.

                       ANDY
             I always used to believe that when
             you threw in a coin it turned into
             your wish.

     The kids BEGIN to POCKET the change, joyously FILLING their
     pockets with the money. Stef PAUSES. Something is BOTHERING
     her. She LOOKS at the others.

                       STEF
             Wait -- these are somebody else’s
             wishes. Not ours.

     Stef EMPTIES her pockets. The other kids PAUSE, doing the
     same. Mouth PAUSES, putting one of the quarters into his
     pocket.

                       MOUTH
             Yeah. Well this wish was mine and
             it didn't come true.

     Mikey STARES at the map, then STARES at the medallion he
     found around Chester Copperpot's NECK. Mikey is PUZZLED.
     TALKING to himself.

                       MIKEY
             What's this got to do with the map?
             Huh, One Eyed Willy -- I know the
             answer's here somewhere -- I know
             how smart you are --

     Mikey EXAMINES the medallion, looking for some sort of
     clue. Suddenly, a SPLASH. In FRONT of Data. Data FISHES for
     what landed in the water. He removes a SILVER DOLLAR. He
     LOOKS at the other kids. SURPRISED.

                       DATA
             Who's got the "K" to be makin'
             dollar wishes?


92   EXT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                        92
                                                                81.


     Troy sits at the side of the well, his red Mustang in the
     background. He's JUST TOSSED the silver dollar. Troy is
     drinking Buds with THREE of his muscular FRIENDS. One of
     the friends gives a COCKEYED smile to Troy.

                       FRIEND
             Whadja' wish for?

                       TROY
             To make it with Andy.

     Suddenly, the silver dollar FLIES BACK OUT of the well.
     HITTING Troy in the head. He GLARES down into the well.

                       TROY
             Hey! Who's down there?


93   INT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                        93

     Everybody goes nuts. The goonies SCREAM and CHEER-for help

                       EVERYBODY
             Hey -- throw us a line -- Help!
             We're down here!


94   EXT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                        94

     A hopeful Troy LOOKS at his friends. He SHOUTS back into
     the well.

                       TROY
             Andy? -- 'Zat your voice I hear?


95   INT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                        95

     Andy. SCREAMS, thinking ONLY of herself.

                       ANDY (O.S.)
             Yeah, Troy! I'm stuck down here!
             How 'bout sendin' down the bucket
             and rope! Please! Save me!


96   EXT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                        96

                       TROY
                  (smiles, to his friends)
             See, dudes! Wishes DO come true.

     Troy LOWERS the bucket into the well.
                                                             82.


97   INT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                     97

     The kids WAIT. EXCITED. But Mikey stands ALONE, staring at
     the medallion and the map. A PUZZLED, CONFUSED LOOK on his
     face. He TALKS to himself.

                       MIKEY
             I know I can beat you- - this is
             just another one a' your tricks --
             right, One Eyed Willy?

                                                         CUT TO:


98   INT. SLOTH’S ROOM - NIGHT                                     98

     Sloth sits with his BACK to us. He sits in FRONT of the
     T.V. His face a few INCHES from the screen. He is watching
     a pirate movie. Jake and Francis CARRY Chunk inside. They
     sit his chair directly BESIDE Sloth. Sloth DOESN’T notice.
     Too INTERESTED in the show. Jake SMIRKS at Sloth.

                       JAKE
             Hey- - don't sit so close to the
             T.V. It'll screw up your ammo.

     Jake and Francis LAUGH. Sloth IGNORES them. They EXIT the
     room. Chunk STARES ahead. SCARED. He still CAN'T SEE
     Sloth's face. He emits a NERVOUS LAUGH. Trying to be
     FRIENDLY.

                       CHUNK
             Hi -- how ya' doin' -- my name's
             Lawrence. Everybody calls me
             "Chunk". Guess that's 'cause I eat
             too much Twinkie juice- -

     Sloth TURNS from the T.V. Emitting a LOUD, ANGRY GROWL. WE
     SEE SLOTH'S FACE. For the FIRST TIME. Lit by the FLICKERING
     blue of the T.V. screen. Sloth's MISHAPEN head is ENORMOUS.
     RECTANGULAR. A small patch of GREYISH hair sits on the top
     of his pointed skull. His neck and temple are SHAVED. His
     ears are HUGE. His WIDE, BULBOUS NOSE stretches, across his
     face. His lips are THICK. DRIPPING with saliva. His front
     teeth PROTRUDE. CROOKED. YELLOW. Hjg eyes are CROOKED. One
     sits in the MIDDLE OF HIS cheek. The other is in its PROPER
     PLACE. A MONSTROSITY.

     Chunk SCREAMS. TRAPPED. Sloth gives a HIGH PITCHED GIGGLE.
     He's found a FRIEND.


99   INT. BASEMENT - KITCHEN                                       99
                                                            83.


    Mama and the boys INSPECT the fireplace passageway. Each
    carrying a pistol and a FLASHLIGHT. Francis is holding the
    DOUBLOON. STUDYING it. Mama KICKS OUT the fireplace grid
    and starts into the tunnel. Jake and Francis COCK their
    pistols and FOLLOW Mama inside.

                                                        CUT TO:


100 INT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                     100

    The bucket has LOWERED to the bottom. Andy GRABS it first.
    The other guys GATHER AROUND. EXCITED. HOPEFUL. But Mikey
    is still STARING at the map and medallion, still PUZZLED,
    still MUMBLING to himself. Mikey sees that the bucket has
    ARRIVED. Andy PUTS her foot into the bucket. Mikey SHOUTS
    to her.

                       MIKEY
             Andy -- Wait!!! We’ve got this
             other clue -- Chester Copperport
             never got this far -- we have a
             chance --

                       AN£Y
             A chance at what, Mikey? Getting
             killed? Look, if we keep goin' --
             somebody's gonna get dead." Maybe
             killed. Boulders -- bats --
             gorillas! Just imagine what kinda'
             other stuff is down here! Besides -
             - we gotta get to the Police --

                       MIKEY
             Chunk prob’ly already got to the
             Police.

                       ANDY
             Unless he's dead.

                        MIKEY
                   (snaps at Andy)
             Don't SAY that! Don't EVER say
             that!
                   (a pause)
             Goonies never say die!

                       ANDY
             I'm NOT a goony.

                       MIKEY
                  (a realization)
             Right -- I forgot for a second --
                                                        84.


             (to the others)
        But you guys -- don't ya'
        understand? The next time you see
        the sky, it'll be over another
        town. Next time you take a test,
        it'll be at some other school --
        Our Moms and Dads want the best of
        stuff for us -- but they gotta do
        what's good for them because it's
        their time now -- down here it's
        OUR TIME! But that's all over the
        minute we ride up Troy’s bucket.

Andy PAUSES. Mikey takes a SHOT of Promotene Mist. He LOOKS
at all of the kids. He gives a STRONG, DETERMINED look to
everyone.

                  MIKEY
        Look -- a couple years ago -- My
        Mom and Dad got on that big Game
        Show. Remember, Brand? Mom spent a
        month makin' those funny costumes,
        she was a giant egg. Dad was a
        frying pan. My Dad kept sayin' we
        were gonna live in a place called
        "Easy Street". So we drove all the
        way to Hollywood. When we got there
        -- they put us in this big audience
        -- with all these other people in
        funny costumes. Then some dude with
        lipstick and sprayed hair came down
        the stairs. He walks up to us --

                  ; (A BEAT)
        First he makes Mom guess how much
        toilet bowl cleaner costs -- she
        gets it right. Then he makes my Dad
        guess what a jar of Ragu Spaghetti
        sauces weighs- - he gets it right.
        Then he asks my Dad -- "The Big
        Prize is behind Door #1? Door #2?
        or Door #3?" Now my Dad’s Lucky
        Number was always "2". He got
        married on August Two. He got his
        job on June Two. And he’s got two
        kids --

                  DATA
        Okay. Okay. We got the point! He
        took Door #2!

                  MIKEY
                                                              85.


             No. That’s the weird part. For some
             reason, he took Door #3. So the
             game show guys screams --
             "Congratulations! You've just won -
             -ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND --
                  (a pause)
             And the door swings open. And this
             huge glass jar is sittin' in the
             middle of the stage -- filled with
             TOOTHPICKS. One hundred thousand
             toothpicks.

    Everyone LISTENS. INTERESTED. Troy SHOUTS from above.

                       TROY (O.S.)
             Hey Andy!! You cornin' or not!

    He PULLS the rope. Andy PULLS BACK, lingering for another
    moment, fascinated by Mikey’s story.

                       MIKEY
                  (continuing)
             Everybody in the place was
             laughin'. Even Mom and Dad smiled.
             But I could see on their faces --
             they knew. They were never gonna
             live on Easy Street. They blew
             their chance.
                  (to the others)
             This is it guys- - On Monday, all
             our living rooms turn into golf
             holes. This is our last chance. I
             mean -- I'd feel like a real jerk
             if some guy like Troy dug up all
             the rich stuff -- 'cause we were
             too chickenshit to go for it.

    Everyone LOOKS at each other. How can they ARGUE? They’re
    GOING FOR THE TREASURE! Troy AGAIN SHOUTS from above.

                       TROY (O.S.)
             Hey, Andy -- you wanna stay down
             there with the Goonies? Or are you
             cornin' up here where you belong? I
             ain't got all night!

    Andy PAUSES, turning to the others. They STARE at Andy.
    Waiting for her DECISION.


101 EXT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                       101
                                                        86.


Troy BEGINS to PULL the bucket and rope. It is HEAVY. Troy
gives a VICTORIOUS SMILE to his friends. The bucket ARRIVES
at the top of the well. Troy is met with a SHOCKING SIGHT.
The bucket is wearing Troy's LETTER SWEATER. Troy GRABS the
letter sweater. The bucket is filled with PEBBLES and
ROCKS. His friends CHUCKLE. A HUMILIATED Troy turns and
walks to his Mustang.

CLOSER ON MUSTANG

Troy reaches dejectedly for the door handle as the
SHERIEF'S CAR suddenly pulls up, lights blazing.

                  SHERIFF
             (leans out window)
        Hey, Troy! Hold up!

                  TROY
        What are you doing out here,
        Sheriff?

                  SHERIFF
        Tryin' to stop a lynching, son.
             (Troy is puzzled)
        Mine. All hell's busted loose over
        a bunch of missin' goonies. I got
        their parents callin' me, the
        newspapers callin' me, the Mayor's
        callin', me, and I sure as hell
        don't want to tell you what they're
        callin' me.

                  TROY
             (careful pause)
        Gee, I -- wish I could help you,
        Sheriff, but --

                  SHERIFF
        Somebody said they saw you and Andy
        walking with one of 'em earlier
        today --
             (looks at notebook)
        a Stefanie -- goddamn these polish
        names --

                  TROY
        Me? Walking with a goonie? When my
        ass learns how to chew gum.
        Sheriff.

                    SHERIFF
                                                               87.


             Well when it does, son, you be sure
             and give me a call. There's a damn
             few things left in this world I’d
             pay to see, but that's one of ’em.

    The Sheriff's car roars off. Troy watches, guilty but
    defiant.


102 INT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                        102

    Andy stands in FRONT of Mikey, prepared to take the GOONY
    VOWS. MIKEY gives a SERIOUS LOOK to Andy.

                       MIKEY
             Raise your right hand. Repeat after
             me.

    Andy RAISES her right hand. She REFEATS every word Mikey
    says.

                       MIKEY
             "I will never betray my goon dock
             friends, We will stick together
             until the whole world ends,
             Through,heaven and hell, and
             nuclear war, Good pals like us,
             will stick like tar. In the city,
             or the country, or the forest, or
             the boonies, I am proudly declared
             a fellow --"
                  (Mikey’s eyes go wide, HE
                  SCREAMS!)
             LEECH!!!!!

                       ANDY
             Leech!
                  (pauses, puzzled)
             Leech? You mean "goony”!

                       MIKEY
                  (Cont1d)
             I mean LEECH! All over your arm!
             LEECHES!

    Andy LOOKS at her arm. There are countless TINY, BLACK,
    SLIMY LEECHES covering her arm! The kids PANIC. Everyone is
    COVERED with the little bloodsuckers. They DASH OUT OF THE
    WATER!

                                                        CUT TO:
                                                               88.


103 INT. SLOTH'S ROOM - NIGHT                                        103

    CLOSE UP - T.V. SCREEN. JULIA CHILD prepares a CHOCOLATE
    FUDGE CAKE. She pours creamy CHOCOLATE FROSTING over the
    double layer cake. CAMERA PULLS BACK. Chunk and Sloth both
    STARE at the T.V. screen. Both their mouths WATERING over
    the food. They are both incredibly HUNGRY. Sloth UTTERS a
    word. If a GRIZZLY BEAR could speak, it would sound like
    Sloth.

                       SLOTH
             Chocolate.
                  (turns, smiles at Chunk)
             Chocolate!

    Chunk gives an APPROVING SMILE back. They share a COMMON
    LOVE. Chunk REMEMBERS something. Although his hands are
    tied, he has enough freedom to move into his back pocket.

    Chunk's fingers DIG into the pocket. He removes a somewhat
    crushed "ALMOND JOY". Chunk LIFTS the candy bar. SHOWING it
    to Sloth. Sloth gives a GIANT SMILE.

                       SLOTH
             Almond Joy! Almond Joy!

    Chunk tries to throw the candy bar to Sloth. It lands
    BETWEEN them both. On the FLOOR. Out of Chunk and Sloth's
    REACH. Sloth GROWLS. ANGRY. UPSET. He begins to PULL at the
    chains that BIND HIS LEGS to the wall.

    Chunk WATCHES. FRIGHTENED. Sloth pulls HARDER. GRUNTING.
    GROANING. The wall surrounding the bolts begins to GIVE.
    Plaster CRACKS. CRUMBLES. The bolts FLY OUT OF THE WALL.
    The chains DROP TO THE FLOOR. Sloth's legs are FREE. Chunk
    SHAKES HIS HEAD.

                       CHUNK
             Geez, mister -- You're even
             hungrier than me.

    Sloth gives a WHEEZING LAUGH. He begins to pull at the
    chains that BIND HIS ARMS. Chunk just WATCHES.

                                                        CUT TO:


104 INT. WISHING WELL - NIGHT                                        104

    The kids are COVERED WITH LEECHES! They are in a FRENZY.
    HELPLESS.
                                                            89.


    Andy tries to SHAKE the leeches from her arms and fingers.
    Brand tries to PULL OFF the leeches. Mikey tries to DANCE
    off the leeches. Nothing WORKS. The leeches are STUCK.

    Data thinks FAST. OPENING his yellow vinyl blanket! He
    removes a medium sized 20 VOLT BATTERY! He hurriedly
    CONNECTS two wires to the battery. Data runs to the edge of
    the WATER POOL. Data keeps his feet in the SHALLOW SECTION.
    He inserts the ends of the battery wires INTO THE WATER. A
    LOW VOLTAGE SHOCK surges through Data. The leeches FALL OFF
    his body! ELECTROCUTED! Data MOTIONS for the others to join
    him. As each person STEPS into the water, Data INSERTS the
    two wires. A SUCCESS. The device REMOVES the leeches from
    everyone. Only Andy and Stef REMAIN. Andy STEPS into-the
    water. She gets her electric SHOCK. A SMILE slowly appears
    on her face. Her knees BUCKLE. WEAK. She emits a SIGH.
    Followed by a tiny SQUEAL. The SAME thing happens to Stef.
    Once they're out of the water, Stef WHISPERS to Andy.

                        STEF
             I got all tingly.
                   (a sigh)
             Just my luck -- I'm in love with a
             pond.

                       ANDY
                  (but Andy feels violated
                  by this)
             Who's responsible for that?!?

    Andy looks at Data, who is HOLDING up the two electrical
    wires. Data victoriously smiles and wiggles his eyebrows
    suggestively. Andy SLAPS Data across the face. This causes
    a chain reaction on Data's BOBBY TRAPPED body. A tiny GI
    JOE DOLL pops out of Data's shirt and fires a single shot
    PLASTIC PROJECTILE at Andy. The GI JOE goes back down
    inside of Data's shirt, not unlike a CUCKOO CLOCK. Andy
    ROLLS her eyes.

                                                        CUT TO:


105 INT. CHESTER COPPERPOT TUNNEL                                 105

    AN AGONIZED SCREAM is heard as Jake tries to pull Mama over
    the top of a boulder while Francis pushes from behind. The
    lady is spreadeagled over the huge rock as the two boys
    struggle hard.

                       MAMA
                  (at Francis)
             Push, goddamn you --
                  (at Jake)
                                                           90.


        Before this one pulls my arms out -
        -
             (at Francis)
        Push!!

Francis gives a mighty shove up on Mama’s behind as she
lurches forward with a ROAR, instantly SLAPS Jake in the
face!

                  JAKE
        What was that for?

                  MAMA
        For what your brother just did!

                  JAKE
        Why didn't you hit him?

                  MAMA
        He isn't here yet!

                  FRANCIS
             (coming over boulder)
        Mama, look!

They see the skeleton of Chester Copperpot lying on the
ground. Jake leans down, picks up the wallet, opens it.

                  JAKE
             (at empty wallet)
        Niente. Kids musta cleaned him out.

                  MAMA
        Sure. Right before they ate him.

                  FRANCIS
             (at Jake)
        Stupid --

                    FRANCIS
        This is   Chester Copperpot. He went
        lookin'   for the missing treasure of
        William   B. Pordobel -- better known
        as "One   Eyed Willy".

                  MAMA
             (holds up doubloon)
        That's what this is from?

                   FRANCIS
                                                        91.


        One Eyed Willy was one a' the most
        ingenious pirates of the 16th
        Century. The guy started out as a
        Court Jester, but was banished from
        5 Spanish Courts because of his
        off-color stories and pratical
        jokes --

Jake GRABS the doubloon from Mama. He STAYS BEHIND,
examining the doubloon as Mama and Francis CONTINUE AHEAD.

                  FRANCIS
        So, Willy formed this Pirate Band -
        - and they set sail on this ship,
        "Inferno". Willy and his men
        marauded hundreds of the King's
        ships. They accumulated a treasure
        worth millions.
             (a beat)
        Legend has it -- that while bein'
        attacked by three of the King's
        ships, Willy steered his stricken
        ship into a hidden, underground
        cavern -- which the British sealed
        with their cannon fire. Willy and
        the other survivors spent the next
        couple years hidin' out, tryin' to
        repair the Inferno. They built a
        bunch of underground caves, loaded
        with all kindsa weird booby --
        traps -- to protect the treasure.
        One of his men escaped to tell
        Willy's story --
             (shrugs)
        And that's been the local legend
        around here for a couple hundred
        years.

MEANWHILE, Jake still stands in the background, STARING at
the doubloon. Jake is STANDING directly BELOW the hole
where earlier, the Gorilla had FALLEN. Suddenly, a LARGE,
HAIRY GORILLA ARM reaches down. The arm GRABS the toupee
off Jake's head.

                  JAKE
        MAAAAAAA—!!

                  MAMA
             (notices that he’s bald)
        What happened to your piece?

                  JAKE
             (lifting gun)
                                                        92.


        Nothing, Ma. I got it right here!

                  MAMA
             (slapping him on top of
             his bald head)
        Your HAIR piece!

Jake REMEMBERS, then looks at MAMA with fear in his eyes.

                  JAKE
        I can’t tell ya, Ma.

                  MAMA
        What do ya' mean, you can't
        tell'me?

                  JAKE
        If I do, you'll let me have it
        again!

                  MAMA
             (softening)
        No I ain't. Just tell me son.

                  JAKE
             (flinching)
        OK -- some huge, friggin' hairy
        thing took it!

                  MAMA
             (nodding thoughtfully
             while looking at him)
        You're a smart boy, Jake.

                  JAKE
             (smiles, dim-wittedly)
        “Yeah? Why's that Ma?

                  MAMA
        You knew I was gonna hit ya!
             (she let's him have it --
             WHACKS!!)

Jake TURNS and RUNS. Suddenly, THERE IS A LOUD BANG! Jake
Jake whacks Francis in the face!

                  JAKE
        Your message from Mama!

                  MAMA
             (whacking Jake)
        Don't slap your brother!
                                                             93.


    Jake lurches backward from the blow. Suddenly, THERE IS A
    LOUD BANG! Francis jumps! We hear ANOTHER LOUD BANG!

    Francis draws his pistil, FIRES, as Mama and Jake duck for
    cover.

                                                        CUT TO:

    JUMPS! He begins to RUN AGAIN! We hear ANOTHER BANG! And
    ANOTHER! Jake FIRES his pistol! Up ahead, Mama and Francis
    DUCK for cover.

                                                        CUT TO:


106 INT. TUNNEL LEADING TO DEAD END                                106

    The goonies are FROZEN in their section of the passageway.
    The BANGS ARE AUDIBLE, far back in the passageway. The kids
    EXCHANGE A FRIGHTENED, PANICKED GLANCE!

                       BRAND
             What was that?! What was that
             sound?!

                       DATA
             My booby caps.
                  (holds up caps)
             I put these on the ground so we can
             hear if somebody's following us!

    The kids all exchange a SHOCKED PAUSE! The realization
    suddenly HITS THEM! Stef SCREAMS!

                       STEF
             That means somebody's FOLLOWING
             US!!!

    With a SCREAM, all of the kids RUN OFF INTO THE PASSAGEWAY!

                                                        CUT TO:


107 INT. CHESTER COPPERPOT TUNNEL                                  107

    Jake manages to CATCH HIS BREATH. Mama EXAMINES the floor
    beneath him. She picks up a ROW OF CAPS from beneath Jake’s
    shoe. She gives Jake a SLAP to the head.

                       MAMA
             What's yert problem? Firin' yer gun
             over a buncha' kiddie caps?
                                                               94.


                                                           CUT TO:


108 INT. TUNNEL LEADING TO DEAD END                                  108

    The Goonies are running through the passageway. Data LEADS
    the way with a flare! His light illuminates a GRADUAL RISE
    in elevation. The kids round a corner, arriving in a SMALL,
    CONFINED AREA. A DEAD END! The flare GOES OUT!

    Data reaches back. His hand fumbles over a stick of
    DYNAMITE, but grabbing another FLARE instead! Meanwhile, a
    look of PANIC seizes Brand. He begins to HYPERVENTILATE.
    Becoming more CLAUSTROPHOBIC. Andy tries to COMFORT him.

                       BRAND
             Great! A Dead End!!! Now What?!?
             Huh?!?

                       ANDY
             We go back the same way we came in.

    Mikey LOOKS to the map. PUZZLED. Talking to HIMSELF.

                       MIKEY
             It’s gotta go on- - Right "One Eyed
             Willy"? You wouldn’t end it here --
             you always got somethin’ up your
             sleeve --

    In the background, Brand CONTINUES to FREAK OUT. His face
    has become a DEEP PULSING RED. His eyes BULGE. CRAZED. He
    is on the verge of EXPLOSION.

                       BRAND
             I can’t breath! -- It’s too small
             in here!!! You guys are usin’ up
             all the air!! It’s too small!!!

    Mikey FINDS a SPANISH PHRASE written on the map that
    corresponds to where the kids are. Mikey POINTS it out to
    Mouth. Mouth TRANSLATES.

                       MOUTH
             "Copper bones, Triple stones,
             Westward foams!"

                        MIKEY
                  (looks at the medallion)
             Here’s copper bones --
                  (puzzled, mumbling the
                  rest)
                  (-- of the riddle)
                                                           95.


Everyone LOOKS around. They are SURROUNDED by MOSSY,
EARTHEN WALLS. Everyone is INTERRUPTED by a SCREAM. Brand
suddenly SNAPS!

                  BRAND
        I can't breath!!! You guys sucked
        all the air!!! You sucked it all!!!
        Lemmmee’ out!!! Leemmmeee’ out!!!

Brand begins to literally CLIMB THE WALLS. He TEARS and
RIPS at the walls with his hands. He tears off the MOSS!

He rips out pieces of earth and ROOTS! The goonies each
GRAB a piece of Brand, trying to hold him back. Finally,
they get him to the ground and PILE ON TOP OF HIM! When he
finally RELAXES, the kids get off. ONE by ONE. Stef LIFTS
her shirt and motions for Brand to put his head INSIDE.

                  STEF
        Okay. Breath your own carbon
        dioxide. It’s good for you.

Brand’s head is STUFFED beneath Stef’s shirt, his head
buried into her chest. Andy just STARES. Her eyes ANGRY.
Stef NOTICES this and PUSHES Brand out from beneath her
shirt and toward Andy.

                  STEF
        Ah -- I think maybe -- maybe Andy’s
        better equipped for this --

Andy NODS. Brand stuffs his head UNDER her shirt.
Meanwhile, Mikey TURNS to the wall that Brand has raped.
The wall has been COMPLETELY STRIPPED of earth and moss.
All that remains is a STONE WALL of JUTTING, STONE PEGS.
They appear to be very NATURAL, but they manage to CATCH
Mikey’s eye. He SMILES, talking to himself.

                   MIKEY
        "Copper Bones--”
             (he holds up the
             medallion, looking
             through the holes at the
             wall)
        --Triple stones--”

Mikey begins to try and FIT the COPPER MEDALLION’S HOLES
over three of the jutting stone pegs. He TRIES several
stones, but nothing seems to fit. The kids are GATHERED
around Mikey. In the background, Brand is still buried
beneath Andy’s shirt. The other goonies CURIOUSLY watch
Mikey.
                                                              96.


                       DATA
             What's he doing?

                       MOUTH
             He flipped. Just like his brother.
             Just like the rest of us pretty
             soon. We’re all gonna go batty. One
             by one. Pretty soon we’ll be eatin’
             each other’s fingers to stay alive.

    Mikey SUDDENLY fits the medallion over THREE JUTTING
    STONES. A PERFECT FIT. Mikey WHISPERS to himself. PUZZLED.

                       MIKEY
             Westward foam? -- foams -- foams --

                       MOUTH
             Foam -- my Grandad had a dog that
             foamed after it got bit by a skunk.

                       DATA
             Shaving foam?

                       STEF
             Foam! Yeah, foam! There's foam in
             the ocean when it breaks on a
             shore.

                       MIKEY
                  (nods)
             The ocean's to the West --

    Mikey tries to TURN the medallion to the West! Suddenly,
    like a built in doorknob, the medallion and the stones
    TURN. WE HEAR a LOUD CREAKING SOUND! Mikey STEPS back. The
    kids EXCHANGE a puzzled look.

    SUDDENLY, A CANNONBALL FLIES OUT OF A SECRET COMPARTMENT IN
    THE WALL! The kids JUMP BACK! The cannonball rolls into a
    small PATH that we see is meant for the cannonball. In
    typical RUBE GOLDBERG fashion, the cannonball sets off a
    chain of events that climaxes with the FLOOR BENEATH DATA
    FLIPPING OPEN! This sends Data FLYING and SCREAMING into
    the deep darkness of the new hole!


109 INT. HOLE WITH WOODEN SPIKES                                    109

    CAMERA ENTERS HOLE WITH FALLING DATA!

    Data SCREAMS and FALLS through the darkness. TOWARD the
    bottom. As Data FALLS CLOSER to the bottom, we
                                                            97.


                                                        CUT TO:

    DATA’S P.O.V. - COMING AT HIM, A SKELETON is VISIBLE,
    standing at the bottom of the tunnel. Surrounded by SHARP
    WOODEN SFlKES.


110 INT. TUNNEL AT DEAD END                                       110

    The Goonies stand over the hole. Data’s screams suddenly
    DIE! COMING to an ABRUPT STOP! The kids PAUSE. LOOKING at
    each other. A FRIGHTENED, QUESTIONING look fills their
    eyes. They GATHER around the hole. The kids PEER inside.
    There is NOTHING BUT BLACKNESS. Brand CALLS OUT.

                       BRAND
             Data? Data?

    There is no answer. Andy’s face goes WHITE. She shouts into
    the HOLE! PANICKED!

                       ANDY
             Data! DATA!!! Oh my God.
                  (and starts to pray)
             Hail Mary, full of Grace --
                  (crosses herself)

                        MOUTH
             They probably got Chunk --
                  (screams down into the
                  hole)
             DATA! DATA!! DAAAAATTTTTAAAA!!!
                  (looks up at all the kids
                  in a soft voice says)
             He went down -- I coulda’ grabbed
             him -- I was this close -- this
             close. He’s really --

                       BRAND
                  (quietly)
             -- gone.

    Upon hearing this everyone breaks down and starts crying.
    Mikey, already sobbing, starts to cry uncontrollably.

    Brand, who's been holding Andy, leaves her to put his arms
    around Mikey. He lifts Mikey up and the two brothers clutch
    each other.

                       MIKEY
                  (crying into Brand's
                  shoulder)
                                                            98.


             I'm gonna miss the way he used to
             shout out the names of all those
             goofy inventions of his --
                  (remembering)
             "Glasses of Death!" -- "Bully
             Blinder"! -- "Smoke Screen"

    SUDDENLY, A VOICE ECHOES FROM BELOW!

                       DATA (O.S.)
             "Pinchers of Peril"!

    A LOOK OF HOPE covers the kids' faces. They SHOUT into the
    hole.

                       EVERYONE
             Data! Data! Are you okay? Speak to
             us!


112 INT. HOLE WITH WOODEN SPIKES                                  112

    Data HANGS a few inches from the top of the skeleton's
    head. He has been SAVED by his "Pinchers Of Peril". They
    have CLAMPED ONTO A JUTTING ROCK several feet above Data.

    He DANGLES in midair, bobbling up and down on the SLINKY-
    LIKE COIL. He SCREAMS UPWARD.

                       DATA
             "Pinchers of Peril"! I've been
             saved by my "Pinchers of Peril"!

    Data LOOKS DOWN. The skeleton below him seems to be part of
    a new passageway. There is a phosphorescent LIGHT
    glimmering throughout the passageway. Data SHOUTS.

                       DATA
             Hey, you guys -- I found another
             hole -- It's all lit up down here -
             -


113 INT. TUNNEL AT DEAD END                                       113

    Up above, the goonies exchange a puzzled glance. Brand
    notices he's still holding onto Mikey. He drops him like a
    small sack of fertilizer and moves over to reclaim his
    territory on Andy.


114 INT. SLOTH’S ROOM                                             114
                                                              99.


    TWO GIANT, HAIRY HANDS RIPPING the "Almond Joy" candy bar
    in two. CAMERA PULLS BACK. We are back in Sloth's room.

    Sloth has torn his bindings FROM THE WALL. The fragments of
    heavy chain still HANG from his arms and legs. Chunk still
    sits BESIDE Sloth. TIED UP. In his CHAIR. Sloth GOBBLES
    DOWN half of the candy bar. He pauses and puts the other
    half into Chunk’s MOUTH. Chunk happily CHEWS. Sloth WALKS
    toward Chunk. His DARK SHADOW towering over Chunk. Sloth's
    arms REACH OUT for Chunk. Chunk PANICS. Thinking he's going
    to be KILLED.

                       CHUNK
             Wait -- please -- don’t --

    Sloth GRABS Chunk by the shoulders. Sloth LIFTS Chunk AND
    the chair. UP INTO THE AIR. Until their faces are on the
    SAME LEVEL. Chunk is still FRIGHTENED. Sloth leans forward
    and KISSES CHUNK! On the LIPS! It’s a HARMLESS, GENTLE
    KISS. SLOTH’S EXPRESSION OF FRIENDSHIP. SLOTH leans back
    and giggles. Chunk GRIMACES.

                       CHUNK
             Man. You smell like P.E.

    Sloth DROPS Chunk! Chunk and the chair HIT THE FLOOR!

    SMASH! The chair BREAKS. Into several pieces. Chunk gets to
    his FEET. FREE. Chunk BRUSHES himself .off. Sloth GRABS
    Chunk's hand.

                       CHUNK
             Hey -- what're you --

    Sloth PULLS Chunk out of the room.


115 INT. BASEMENT - KITCHEN                                         115

    Sloth pulls Chunk inside. Sloth RUNS to the freezer. He
    OPENS THE DOOR. He LOOKS BACK at Chunk.

                       SLOTH
             T-bone.

    Sloth rips open-the freezer’s PLASTIC BAG. He removes a
    thick, FROZEN T-BONE STEAK. Sloth takes a HUGE BITE from
    the frozen meat. CHEWING the crunchy steak. Sloth OFFERS a
    bite to Chunk. Chunk DECLINES.

                       CHUNK
             Ah, no -- no- - you keep it. I like
             mine not so crunchy --
                                                       100.


Sloth SHRUGS. He CONTINUES eating the steak. BONES and all.
Chunk spots a TELEPHONE. He walks out of the freezer and
GRABS the PHONE. Chunk DIALS a THREE DIGIT number.

                  CHUNK
        Hello? Sheriff? I'm at the old
        Lighthouse Lounge -- And -- well,
        I'd like to report a- - first,
        there's a murder -- actually, two
        murders. Plus, we found the hideout
        of those Fratelli people -- then --

                  SHERIFF (V.O.)
        Wait. Just hold on here. Is this
        you again, Lawrence?

                  CHUNK
             (embarrassed)
        Ah -- Yeah -- It is.

                  SHERIFF (V.O.)
        When the hell are you gonna’ stop
        buggin' me? Do I hafta’ call your
        Mother again?

Meanwhile, Sloth has begun to DEVOUR a FROZEN TURKEY. He
RIPS the turkey apart. One of the legs FLIES OUT of Sloth’s
hands. Bouncing INTO THE FIREPLACE. Sloth RUNS to the
fireplace. Chunk tries to CONVINCE the Sheriff.

                  CHUNK
        Sheriff -- this time I’m tellin’
        the truth --

                  SHERIFF (V.O.)
        Yeah. Just like the time you told
        me 50 Iranian terrorists took over
        every "Sizzler Steak House” in the
        city --

                  CHUNK
        Okay. I'll admit -- that was a joke
        --

Sloth REACHES into the fireplace hole. Trying to FIND the
turkey leg. He NOTICES the dark passageway. He looks into
the BLACKNESS. Sloth emits a ROAR into the passageway.

The passageway ECHOS BACK with another ROAR. Sloth LAUGHS.
He ROARS again. Another echo ANSWERS BACK. Sloth laughs
HARDER. He's found ANOTHER FRIEND. Chunk STILL TRIES to
convince the Sheriff.
                                                             101.


                       CHUNK
             Honest, Sheriff -- you gotta
             believe me --

                       SHERIFF (V.O.)
             I do? Just like tfiat last prank
             about all those little creatures
             that multiply when you throw water
             on 'em!

    Chunk NOTICES something. Sloth is CLIMBING INTO THE
    FIREPLACE.

                       CHUNK
             Sheriff -- hold on --
                  (calls to Sloth)
             Wait! Get back here! Hey!

    As Chunk DOES this, he clumsily TEARS THE PHONE OUT OF THE
    WALL! Sloth CONTINUES to crawl into the fireplace.

    CHASING his new friend. Seeing that there is NO CHANCE to
    repair the phone. Chunk runs to the FIREPLACE and FOLLOWS
    Sloth inside.

                                                          CUT TO:


116 INT. HOLE WITH WOODEN SPIKES                                    116

    The kids have LOWERED themselves into the new passageway
    from a length of ROPE. A DIM, PHOSPHORUS LIGHT fills the
    area, caused by microscopic sea creatures and plankton.


117 INT. CIRCULAR CHAMBER                                           117

    They walk into a circular chamber with THREE SEPARATE
    TUNNELS. THE SKELETON, dressed in PIRATE'S COSTUME, is
    suspended in a CHAIN-LIKE contraption, amidst a series of
    SHARP, WOODEN SPIKES, in the middle of the room. The kids
    STARE at the skeleton, PUZZLED, SHOCKED by what they see.

    The kids slowly INCH TOWARD the skeleton. Mikey NOTICES
    that the three tunnels all lead off into DIFFERENT
    DIRECTIONS. Nothing in particular DISTINGUISHES one tunnel
    from the other. The kids are PUZZLED. CONFUSED.

                       MOUTH
             Hey, Mikey. Which door's the
             hundred thousand toothpicks behind?
                                                           102.


    CAMERA MOVES IN on Mikey. Can history be repeating itself
    and handing Mikey a second chance? He LOOKS at the map.

    Andy is BOUNCING up and down on one leg. She has to go to
    the bathroom. She turns to Stef. Stef is ALSO BOUNCING up
    and down on one leg. Andy PULLS Stef's arm. They SNEAK OFF
    TOGETHER. Into ONE of the three tunnels. Everyone is too
    CONCERNED with One Eyed Willy to notice. Meanwhile, Mikey
    has FOUND the spot on the map where the path veers off into
    three directions. A SPANISH RIDDLE is written here.

    Mikey POINTS this out to Mouth.; Mouth EXAMINES the phrase.
    He TRANSLATES, in the voice of PETER LORRE.

                       MOUTH
             "Three tunnels of mystery, All lead
             to unknown, To travel correctly,
             Tickle the funnybone."

    Everyone TURNS to the skeleton. LOOKING for the funnybone.

                       MIKEY
                  (with total commitment)
             I know it's door number two. This
             time it's gotta' be the middle
             tunnel. Everything's behind the
             second door --

                       BRAND
                  (agreeing)
             It's what Dad shoulda' picked!

                       MOUTH
                  (snaps at the brothers)
             Yeah, well maybe my Dad woulda'
             picked Door #3! And maybe Data's
             woulda' picked Door #1! We can't be
             stupid. We're not rushin' into
             anything anymore!

                                                        CUT TO:


118 INT. KISSING TUNNEL                                           118

    Andy and Stef have finished their business. They are
    without a flashlight, or flare. Stef turns to go back. Andy
    pauses, giggling. She composes herself and cries out:

                       ANDY
             Oh, Brand -- Brand --
                  (a beat)
                                                           103.


             It’s so dark over here -- I tripped
             over somethin’ -- think maybe I
             sprained my ankle --

                       STEF
             How can you be thinkin' about Brand
             at a time like this?

                       ANDY
             Because, if we never get out of
             here -- if this is going to be my
             last day on earth -- if we’re going
             to be doomed and condemned -- I'm
             gonna make BRAND WALSH my last
             meal!


119 INT. CIRCULAR CHAMBER                                         119

    Brand and the boys surround the dangling "One Eyed Willy"
    skeleton, still looking for the funnybone. Andy’s voice
    echoes from the tunnel.

                      ANDY (O.S.)
             Brand!

    Brand sighs. He gives a slap to Mikey.

                       BRAND
             Go see what she's raggin' about.

    Mikey follows Andy's voice into one of the tunnels. Brand
    looks at the others.

                       BRAND
             Okay, so we gotta tickle 'im -- But
             where's the funnybone?

    Mouth tickles behind the skeleton's elbow. This triggers a
    LOUD CREAKING SOUND. Suddenly, a skeleton shoots out of one
    of the caves, dressed as the "Angel of Death". The skeleton
    is carrying a large Scythe. Its rusted blade long and
    sharp. The booby-trapped skeleton speeds across the floor
    fastened to a wooden board with wheels. The scythe blade
    coming straight for the boys heads. The boys duck, just in
    time. The skeleton shoots by. The sickle blade just missing
    their heads by less than an inch. The skeleton slams into a
    far wall, shattering into a million pieces. The boys catch
    their breath.

                                                        CUT TO:
                                                           104.


120 INT. WISHING WELL                                             120

    The Fratelli's make their way out of the small water pool.
    They are smoking cigarettes, burning off the leeches with
    the fiery end of the cigarette. Mama spots footprints
    leading out of the pond. She smiles.

                       MAMA
             They went this way. There's little
             Nike prints all over the ground.

    Mama, Jake and Francis continue forward.


121 INT. KISSING TUNNEL                                           121

    Mikey walks through the twisting tunnel, looking for Andy.
    She crouches a few feet ahead, at the edge of the dark
    corner, waiting. Stef watches. In the background, Andy
    calls again.

                       ANDY
             Brand- - Hurry!

    Andy heafs footsteps coming her way. She exchanges a smile
    with Stef. The footsteps get closer. Mikey rounds the
    corner. Andy wraps her arms around him. In the darkness,
    Andy mistakes Mikey for Brand. Andy kisses Mikey. A long,
    passionate, open mouthed kiss. Stef watches, realizing that
    it's Mikey. She hides her laughter. Andy finally stops. She
    leans against the wall, out of breath, eyes closed, in
    dreamland. A giant smile covers her face.

    A startled, but ecstatic Mikey doesn't say a word. He looks
    at Stef. She gives him a wink. She won't divulge his
    secret. Mikey turns. He moves back to the boys, Andy opens
    her eyes. Stef gives a questioning look.

                       STEF
             Okay, you kissed- - now tell!

                       ANDY
                  (scientifically)
             Well! He's not what he appears.
             He's scholarly -- and sensitive --
             and very, very sweet. But there's,
             something weird --

                       STEF
             What's that?

                       ANDY
             I think he wears braces.
                                                            105.


                       STEF
                  (hiding laughter)
             Next time -- You gotta kiss 'im
             with your eyes open. It's a whole
             different experience.

    Stef pulls Andy’s arm. They move back to the chamber.


122 INT. CIRCULAR CHAMBER                                          122

    The boys still sit in front of "One Eyed Willy", shaken,
    puzzled, trying to figure out where the funnybone is
    located. Mikey enters, followed a few seconds later, by
    Stef and Andy. They SEE the smashed skeleton with the
    scythe, puzzled.

                       STEF
                  (pauses, thinking, a
                  realization)
             Okay. Everybody turn around and
             hide your eyes.

                       GOONIES
             What? Turn around? Hide our eyes?
             Why?

                       STEF
             Hey -- You wanna get outta here or
             not?!?

    The guys shrug. What can they lose? Everyone turns around
    and hides their eyes. When Stef gets the privacy she wants,
    she reaches out and grabs the skeleton's crotch. A moment
    passes. A creaking SOUND. The kids brace themselves for
    another booby-trapped scare. But this time One Eyed Willy's
    body contorts. The chain holding the skeleton's right arm
    begins to move. Slowly, the arm raises. It stops in midair.
    The arms finger points to door number THREE. Stef smiles.

                       STEF
             Okay. You guys can turn back
             around.

    The kids turn around and SEE the skeleton pointing to the
    third door. But the kids are puzzled. How did Stef figure
    this out?

                       BRAND
             What'd you do, Stef?

                      STEF
                                                              106.


             I just knew where the funnybone
             was! Okay?!?

    The boys know better than to ask any questions. Mikey seems
    disappointed that the skeleton is pointing to Door number
    3. Mouth puts his arm around Mikey.

                       MOUTH
             Guess your old man woulda' lost
             down here, too.

    Mikey doesn’t say a word as the    others begin to move
    through Door #3. But Mikey gets    a sudden idea. He covers
    his right eye with his hand. He    stares at the skeleton’s
    finger. He moves his hand, then    covers his eyes again. He
    smiles; a realization.

                       MIKEY
             Hey, guys!!! Wait!!

    The kids pause. Mikey looks'at everyone.

                       MIKEY
             Okay -- So One Eyed Willy only had
             one eye -- Right?
                  (the kids agree)
             And if ya' only got one eye --
             Well, ya' sorta' see things in a
             different, way --

    Mikey covers his eye. The other kids follow suit and do the
    same. They SEE that when you cover your eye, the skeleton
    actually points to the middle tunnel.

                       BRAND
                  (turns to Mikey)
             It's the middle tunnel!
                  (to Mouth)
             Door number two!

    Mouth shrugs, reluctantly agreeing. Everyone congratulates
    Mikey, as they run into the middle tunnel.

                                                           CUT TO:


123 INT. CHESTER COPPERPOT TUNNEL                                    123
                                                       107.


Sloth is running through the passageway, eating the frozen
turkey leg. Chunk is a few steps behind Sloth. Sloth walks
through the tunnel. He emits a LOUD SCREAM into the dark
passageway. An ECHO again answers back. Sloth chuckles,
continuing forward. Chunk grabs Sloth's arm, trying to
explain.

                  CHUNK
        Wait! Listen to me! That's not a
        person. That's just your ECHO.
        Understand? Your ECHO!

Sloth pauses. His face lights. He nods, thinking he
understands Chunk.

                  SLOTH
        Eggo! Eggo Waffle!

Sloth turns and continues forward excitedly repeating
"Eggo-waffle" to himself. Chunk follows, trying to reason
with Sloth.

                  CHUNK
        No! Not "Eggo" ECHO! ECHO!

                  SLOTH
        EGGO!

                  CHUNK
        ECHO!

                  SLOTH
        EGGO!

                  CHUNK
        Okay! Have it your way!

Sloth pauses, then grins, his eyes dancing like pinballs
with instant recognition.

                  SLOTH
             (singing the Burger King
             commercial)
        Have it your way --

Chunk beams, immediately joining in, as the two fast
friends head off down the tunnel singing together.

                  CHUNK
             (voice trailing off)
        Actually, my favorite is Domino
        Pizza. I'll take you to one when we
        get back --
                                                           108.


124 INT. CAVERN UNDER ZOO                                         124

    Suddenly, a GROWL is heard. Sloth pauses. He looks around.
    A frightened Chunk hides behind Sloth. Suddenly, a hairy
    GORILLA ARM reaches down from above and grabs the turkey
    leg from sloth's hand. But Sloth doesn't let go. Sloth
    pulls the leg! The Gorilla pulls back! A tug of war!


125 EXT. CAULDRON POINT ZOO - NIGHT                               125

    WE SEE BONZO having a tug of war with someone underground,
    Rprtha grabs hold of Bonzo, assisting her mate.


126 INT. UNDERGROUND                                              126

    The tug of war continues. But Sloth is stronger! He manages
    to pull Bonzo and Bertha through the hole and inside of the
    passageway. Sloth is met face to face with the TWO
    GORILLAS. Bonzo and Bertha GROWL! Ready to kill!

    But Sloth steps into a sliver of light and the Gorillas SEE
    Sloth's face! They are terrified! Sloth growls and snaps,
    leaping forward, and Bertha and Bonzo panic, dashing
    forward into the passageway.

    BONZO AND BERTHA run several feet and leap up the walls,
    trying to burrow out through the ceiling.


127 EXT. KILLING STATION                                          127

    Troy and his friends have stopped at the gas station. A
    MIDDLE-AGED ATTENDANT in greasy work clothes fills the gas
    tank of Troy's Mustang. Troy and his friends get out of the
    car. They're guzzling bottles of Heineken. Troy fumbles
    through his pockets to pay the Station Attendant. Troy
    looks at the front fender. He spots a microscopic, nearly
    invisible scratch.

                       TROY
             Look at that! Look what you did!
             That scratch wasn't there this
             morning!

                       ATTENDANT
                  (honest)
             I wasn't even close to that side of
             the car --

                       TROY
                                                              109.


             Yeah. Right. You Goonies got an
             excuse for everything!

    Troy slugs some beer. Wfe hear a "DING-DING" in b.g. as
    another vehicle pulls up at the pumps.

                       TROY
             You better' start linin' up for
             food stamps, pal. My old man's best
             friends with the guy who owns this
             station. You can kiss your job
             goodbye.

    Another "DING-DING." The irritated Attendant turns toward
    the noise.

                       ATTENDANT
             Listen, I'll be with ya in a --

    ANGLE ON GORILLAS - HIS POV

    The TWO GORILLAS leap out of their red golf cart on the
    other side of the pumps! Grunting in ecstacy at the sight
    of Troy's red automobile, they lumber toward it, tossing
    Troy and his friends to one side like Cabbage Patch dolls.

    Bonzo jumps onto the hood, caving it in, as Bertha leaps
    into the car. Bonzo takes his familiar place behind the
    wheel, reaches out to stomp on the pedals. The car lurches
    forward and drives away erratically, spinning from side to
    side.

    Troy gets to his feet, purple with rage.

                       TROY
             Don't just stand there! Somebody do
             something! That car cost my daddy
             fifteen thousand dollars!

    The satisfied Attendant rehooks the gas nozzle to the pump,
    checks the readings.

                       ATTENDANT
             Plus twenty-two fifty, peckerhead.
             Plus twenty-two fifty.

                                                        CUT TO:


128 INT. CIRCULAR CHAMBER                                            128
                                                              110.


    Mama and the boys enter. They SEE the skeleton pointing to
    the third cave. CAMERA PANS to the floor. We SEE the
    several NIKE footprints leading into the middle cave.
    Francis stares at the skeleton.

                       FRANCIS
             Christ, Ma -- It’s like the Museum
             a' Natural History.

    Jake walks to the skeleton and begins to go through the
    skeleton's pockets.

                       JAKE
             Hey -- Maybe this guy's go some
             spare change.

    Jake's hand reaches into the skeleton's crotch area. The
    skeleton's arm springs back and socks Jake, knocking him to
    the ground! A raging Jake raise his pistol, ready to blow
    the skeleton's brains out. Mama interrupts:

                       MAMA
             Shhhhh! Wait! Listen!

    Jake and Francis pause. We HEAR the distant sound of the
    GOONIES' VOICES echoing from the middle tunnel. Their
    voices are high, squealing with excitement, as if they've
    just discovered something. A menacing smile slithers across
    Mama's face. She checks her revolver, making sure it's
    loaded.


129 INT. PASSAGEWAY WITH MAST OVER WATER                             129

    The Goonies have arrived in a large    section of the
    passageway. A long, crooked, wooden    mast stretches across a
    deep, stream of rushing waters. The    mast is the only way
    across the stream, which leads to a    Skull-shaped opening in
    the wall. Countless living starfish    line the surrounding
    walls.

    CLOSE - GROUP SHOT

    For the first time, all of the Goonies sense the impending
    magic of Mikey's adventure. All stare, jaws limp. Andy
    whispers to Brand:

                       ANDY
             Brand -- Hold my hand -- I gotta'
             be sure this is real.

    Andy reaches out for Brand's hand. Mikey reaches back and
    grabs Andy's hand first. Andy can't tell the difference.
                                                       111.


But Brand, who stands ahead of Mikey, gropes back for
Andy's hand. Mikey thinks fast and grabs a starfish from
the wall. He puts the starfish into Brand's hand. Brand is
satisfied, thinking he is holding Andy's hand. Mikey smiles
to himself. Brand moves his hand forward. He SEES the
starfish. Letting out a scream, he pulls the starfish from
his hand. Mikey quickly lets go of Andy's hand. He can't
hide his giggle. Brand notices. He grabs Mikey in a
headlock.

                  BRAND
        You little wuss! You wanna play
        games? We'll play --

They are suddenly interrupted by the SOUND of BANGING CAPS!
The kids exchange a startled, glance.

                  MOUTH
        Shit! That sound again!

                  STEF
        And it isn't as far back this time!

The kids emit a mutual scream. They run for the mast. They
begin to climb the mast. Some of the kids balance
themselves, trying to walk across. Others straddle the
mast, crawling toward the skull-shaped opening. The old
mast creaks and groans with their every move. A low,
ominous voice suddenly echoes through the chamber.

                  MАМА (O.S.)
        Oooooohhhhh, Booooooyyyyssss!

                  ANDY
        Oooooohhhhh, shhhhiiiiittttt!

                  MOUTH
             (turns, trembling)
        Jerk alert!

The kids stop and turn, having made it halfway along the
mast!

MAMA, JAKE and FRANCIS

stand at the entrance to the passageway, at the foot of the
mast, over 75 yards away from the Goonies. Mama raises, her
pistol toward the kids.

                  MAMA
        Not -- one -- more -- step --
                                                           112.


    The kids look at each other, turn and move, faster along
    the, mast, practically crawling over each other to make it
    to the opening! Mama shoots!

    A section of the mast is hit, blowing it to smithereeens!
    The kids continue to run! Mama fires another shot! The
    bullet zips past Mikey, just missing him. It blows away a
    section of wood directly in front of him! The kids arrive
    at the top, running into the opening. Mama and the boys
    dash forward, beginning to cross the mast. Before entering,
    Data turns, seeing the Fratelli’s coming after him with a
    gun. He reaches for a cord inside of his shirt. He pulls
    the cord and screams.

                       DATA
             Slick shoes!

    Both heels of Data's shoes pop open! A plastic tube
    extends! Black oil sprays out, splattering down the mast!

    As Mama balances herself on the mast, she raises her gun,
    aiming at Data. But the oil has splattered over the entire
    mast. Before Mama can fire a shot, she slips and falls,
    tumbling back into Jake and Francis. They nearly fall off
    the mast, holding on for dear life! Data cheers, but
    suddenly begins to slip himself. Seconds before he falls
    into the stream of water, Mikey grabs him and pulls Data
    into the chamber.


130 INT. ORGAN CHAMBER                                            130

    The Goonies run.inside, panicked, scared. The chamber is no
    more than thirty feet in length. Its passageway is blocked
    by a giant boulder. Brand and Mouth try to movethe boulder
    that blocks the path. Too heavy. Won't budge.

    The kids exchange a frightened glance. They are trapped.
    Built into the wall, beside the boulder, is a pipe organ. A
    quite unusual organ. Each piece, from the keys to the
    pedals, are constructed of human bones. Stef reaches out to
    hit a key. A frenzied Mikey opens the map, reading it with
    Mouth. Mikey shouts out to Stef.

                       MIKEY
             Wait -- Don't --

    Stef pauses. Mouth hurriedly reads another of the map's
    riddles. Beneath this riddle, a few bars of MUSIC are
    written. But a few of the notes are erased and smeared. A
    result of the map’s age. Mouth translates the riddle.

                         MOUTH
                                                           113.


             "To move on, play the tune, As each
             note is said, For too many
             mistakes, Ye will surely be dead.”

                       BRAND
             You mean we gotta play the bones to
             get outta' here?

                       MIKEY
                  (holds up map)
             Anybody know how to read music?

    The kids shake their heads. Stef looks at Andy.

                       STEF
             Hey -- You were the only one of us
             who could afford piano lessons --

                        ANTY
                   (shrugs)
             Six months of lessons. When I was
             five.

                       MIKEY
             Better than nuthin'.

    Mikey gives her the map. Andy examines the bars of music.
    Data is looking back through the tunnel entrance.


131 INT. PASSAGEWAY WITH MAST OVER WATER                          131

    DATA'S POV

    Mama and the boys are back on their feet. Red with anger.
    They attempt to again climb the mast, slipping, sliding,
    and struggling.


132 INT. ORGAN CHAMBER                                            132

    Data LOOKS back to the goonies.

                       DATA
             Hey, guys -- They're comin'!

    Everyone TURNS to Andy. SCARED. HELPLESS. Their SURVIVAL is
    up to her. She gives a NERVOUS shrug.

                       ANDY
             I'll give it a shot.
                                                             114.


    Andy takes a SEAT at the organ. She places the MAP on the
    piano's music stand. Andy READS the first note. Slowly, she
    PUSHES down the foot pedals. She PRESSES one of the bone
    keys. A hollow, mysterious CHORD OF AIR echoes through the
    tunnel. The boulder CREAKS. Opening a CRACK. The kids
    EXCHANGE a hopeful smile.

    Andy READS the next two notes. She hits TWO KEYS. Two
    chords ECHO through the tunnel. The boulder CREAKS again.
    Opening a LITTLE more. Less than an INCH. Andy TRIES to
    read the next note. It is SMEARED. UNREADABLE. Nervous, she
    plays a RANDOM NOTE. A SOUR CHORD blasts through the
    tunnel.

    A LARGE CHUNK OF THE FLOOR CRACKS! It DROPS OUT! INCHES
    from Mikey’s feet. He JUMPS BACK. There is now a LARGE HOLE
    in the floor. Mikey PEERS into the hole. It's a HUNDRED
    FOOT DROP. Onto a floor of SHARP STALAGMITES. Mikey CATCHES
    his breath.

                       MIKEY
             Oh, God! Oh, God!

                         STEF
             What?

                       DATA
             My whole life just flashed before
             me!

                       STEF
             Life? What life? You're eleven
             years old!

    Andy is TREMBLING. NERVOUS. She ATTEMPTS to read   the note
    again. This time, she PLAYS a different key. The   chord is
    CLEAR. MELODIC. It SINGS through the tunnel. The   boulder
    moves AGAIN. Opening another INCH. The kids emit   a group
    SIGH. Data still keeps WATCH.


133 INT. PASSAGEWAY WITH MAST OVER WATER                            133

    Mama, Francis and Jake are more than halfway along the
    mast. Francis slips, nearly falling into the stream. Ohly
    his gun falls into the waters. Francis composes himself and
    continues climbing upward.


134 INT. ORGAN CHAMBER                                              134

    Data panics. He SCREAMS to Andy.
                                                              115.


                       DATA
             Hey, Andy -- Better play faster!
             They're gettin' closer!

    Andy begins to play faster. She hits several correct keys.
    The boulder slowly opens. Inch by Inch. But Andy suddenly
    hits a wrong note. Another huge section of floor drops out.
    Mouth nearly falls to his death. Stef grabs him. In the
    nick of time.

    MAMA AND THE BOYS are only a few feet from the opening.


134A INT. ORGAN CHAMBER                                              134A

    Data SCREAMS at Andy.

                       DATA
             Faster, Andy! You gotta play
             faster!

    Andy tries to play faster. This causes the boulder to open
    a little more quickly. But in the frenzy, Andy manages to
    his a few wrong notes. The Sour notes always trigger
    another section of the floor to drop out. The goonies are
    diving. Leaping. Doing everything to avoid the deadly holes
    in the floor.

    Soon, only one section of the floor remains intact: the
    section holding the Organ. All of the kids are clustered
    together. Clutching, grabbing onto different sections of
    the organ. The remaining section of floor tilts and
    quivers. If this section drops, the organ will crumble and
    all of the goonies will fall to their deaths.

                       MIKEY
             Mouth -- Say somethin' funny!

                       MOUTH
                  (screams in his own
                  voice)
             We're all gonna die!

    Andy nods. Hands shaking. Dripping with sweat. She
    hurriedly plays the final bar of notes. Andy looks at the
    map's final note. Completely blurred. Andy pauses. Trying
    to decide what note to hit.

                       BRAND
                  (panicked, to Andy)
             Andy, whatever you do -- Don't
             screw up another note --
                                                           116.


    MAMA, JAKE and FRANCIS arrive at the foot Of the chamber,
    still slipping and sliding. They reach up. Grabbing the
    chamber's ledge for support. Trying to crawl inside.


135 INT. ORGAN CHAMBER                                            135

    Andy sits at the keyboards. Frozen. Trying to decide what
    note to hit. Seeing the Fratellis, Data SHOUTS to Andy.

                       DATA
             Just play the mother!

    Andy closes her eyes. She raises her index finger. She
    randomly drops it onto the keyboard. A loud melodic note
    sounds through the tunnel. The boulder slowly opens. Wide
    enough for the kids to get through. Andy and the kids climb
    from the organ, through the opening! But Mikey's foot steps
    on yet another note! A wrong note! The organ begins to
    crumble! The floor holding the organ sways, and Mikey is
    still hanging on! Brand reaches out and grabs his brother’s
    hand! He pulls Mikey into the opening, seconds before
    the.entire organ and floor crumble into a million pieces!


136 INT. WATER SLIDE                                              136

    The Goonies have escaped into a steep, long circular water
    slide! The goonies duck and dodge various jutting rocks and
    stallactites as they slide to the bottom! Screaming the
    whole way down!


137 INT. PIRATE SHIP CAVERN                                       137

    A rocky wall. A small passageway. Less than four feet tall.
    It sits at the bottom of the wall. A miniature cave. A
    stream of water suddenly gushes out of the passageway.
    Brand, Mikey and Data also shoot out! They land in the pool
    of water below it. A few seconds pass. Mouth, Stef and Andy
    flow out! Ejected from the passageway!

    The kids catch their breath. Shaking the water from their
    ears. Spitting the water out of their lungs. Mikey sees
    something. His eyes get wide. His mouth drops open.
    Speechless. The others are soon met with the same sight.
    They are equally shocked. Delighted. Overwhelmed. For
    several moments, the kids stare. In wonderment.

    CAMERA PULLS BACK
                                                             117.


    We are in an enormous underground cavern. An enchanting,
    magical place. The high ceilings and walls are lined with
    sparkling rocks. A large pool of water stretches across the
    ground. The most amazing sight in the entire cavern, is an
    authentic, well preserved pirate ship! The gigantic ship is
    tilted on its side. Constructed of wood. Its crooked mast
    and tattered sails are in place. A black, skull and
    crossbones flag waves. At half mast. The figurehead of a
    beautiful woman adorns the ship’s bow. Ancient cannons jut
    from the side of the ship. Half of the ship is buried into
    the cavern wall. The result of a cave in. Hundreds of years
    ago. The kids continue to stare at the amazing sight.
    Speechless.

                                                        CUT TO:


138 INT. HOLE WITH WOODEN SPIKES                                    138

    Sloth climbs down the rope, moving toward the circular
    chamber. Chunk holds onto Sloth’s back. As they climb
    downward, Chunk looks at Sloth.

                       CHUNK
             Ya, know -- You're hot such a
             strange lookin' guy. I used to have
             a snake with two heads.

    Sloth gives a GRUNT. Chunk keeps talking.

                       CHUNK
             And I got this other friend --
             Mitch -- He’s got this -- this big
             hairy thing growin’ out of his neck
             -- People always make fun of it. So
             he only goes out to play at night.
                  (nods)
             Bet you only like to go out at
             night. Huh? Yeah. I know how ya'
             must feel. It's like when I go
             swimmin' at the public pool -- And
             I gotta’ take my shirt off. I get'
             really embarassed -- All the other
             guys got dark tans and ripples in
             their stomachs -- And I’m this
             Pillsbury Dough Boy. So I swim in a
             sweatshirt.


139 INT. CIRCULAR CHAMBER                                           139
                                                           118.


    Sloth gives an understanding GROAN. They arrive at the
    bottom and enter the circular chamber. Sloth and Chunk
    stare at the Pirate Skeleton with childlike astonishment.
    Sloth walks up to the skeleton, removes the Pirate hat and
    puts it on his head. He turns, wiggling his eyebrows to
    Chunk, his expression saying ”How do I look?” Chunk smiles.
    An honest expression on his face.

                       CHUNK
             You -- are a stud!

                                                        CUT TO:


140 INT. ORGAN CHAMBER                                            140

    Mama, Jake and Francis move slowly, carefully. They walk,
    back to the wall, across a thin catwalk along the edge of
    the chamber wall. The catwalk was caused by the fallen
    floor. One slip and they’re dead.

                                                        CUT TO:


141 INT. PIRATE CAVERN                                            141

    The kids stand before the large pool of water. Mikey begins
    to. walk into the water. Brand grabs him.

                       BRAND
             What if there’s more leeches?

    Mikey pauses. Data has a solution. He reaches into his
    shirt and pulls a cord. A large, yellow life raft pops out
    of his backpack. The raft begins to inflate. But it just
    doesn't stop. It continues to get bigger -- Bigger -- until
    -- BOOM! It explodes! The sound sends a shudder through the
    ancient cavern! A small rumbling is heard. Tiny pieces of
    earth crumble from the cavern ceiling. The kids exchange a
    frightened glance. With this they jump into the shallow
    water and hurry toward the ship. As they wade through the
    water, Mikey stares in astonishment at the ship.

                       MIKEY
             Willy had it all planned out -- He
             was waitin’ for us -- Don’t ya’ get
             it? He’s been waitin’ for us for
             three hundred years. It’s almost
             like -- like he wants to invite us
             aboard --
                                                       119.


The kids continue to hurry forward. Stef suddenly feels
something strange, brushing against her thigh underwater.
She turns to Mouth, who is behind her. Stef glares at him,
raising her hand as if to slap him.

                  STEF
        Watch yer hands! Touch me again and
        I’ll She-Вор you!

Mouth gives a puzzled shrug. Stef turns back around.

CAMERA FANS underwater. We see a giant, slitherly tentacle
wiggling a few inches from Stef's thigh. The tentacle
begins to rub Stef’s thigh.

CLOSE - STEF

Her face glowing with anger. She raises her hand, ready to
slap Mouth.

                  STEF
        I warned you—

Stef turns and gives a hard slap to --

A giant squid! Its bloodshot eye and tentacle are face to
face with Stef! It has shot out of the water, between Stef
and Mouth. Stef is speechless! In shock!

The squid retaliates with a slap to Stef, knocking her into
the water! The goonies clutch each other. Terrified.
Another tentacle swoops down, with the sound of a cracking
whip, the tentacle slams into the water between the kids.

                  MIKEY
        What is it?!?

                  DATA
        Giant sushi!!!

The bloodshot eye of the squid moves just above the surface
past the goonies as another tentacled arm sucks across
Andy's breasts, pulling her toward the squid's gaping
mouth. Data removes his cassette player from his backpack.
He turns it on! Cranking the volume. The Talking Heads
"Burning Down the House" blasts from the twin speakers!
Data throws the cassette player into the squid's mouth.
                                                           120.


    The squid reels back, letting go of Andy! The booming
    chorus of the Head's song reverberates through the squid's
    body. It trembles. Quivers. In shock. The monster shoots
    away from the goonies. It is crazed by the rock n' roll.
    The squid wildly bounces off the cavernous walls, trying to
    make the music stop. The squid inadvertantly does a comic
    dance, rocking to the beat of the music and the kids watch
    it disappear. Far into the cavern.

    The goonies run to the pirate ship. Scared out of their
    wits. They arrive at the ship's bow. The gigantic ship
    towers over them. Mikey jumps up. He begins to climb the
    side of the ship. Placing his foot in the thin cracks of
    wood. The other kids hurriedly follow. Mikey shouts down to
    them.

                       MIKEY
             Be careful- - This wood's really
             old. One splinter and you're in for
             hepatitis -- spinal meningitis --
             lockjaw --

    Mikey continues babbling as he climbs over the ship’s top.


142 INT. PIRATE CAVERN                                            142

    The kids climb aboard. They stand on the ship's crooked
    deck. The deck is long and wide. Covered with old, creaky
    boards. Various swords and knives hang on a weapon rack. On
    the outside wall of the main cabin. The kids look for a way
    out. Brand and Mouth scan the wall of weapons.

    Looking for a door. Mikey runs up onto the raised deck.
    Stef and Andy find a trap door. But it is locked by several
    thick, metal chains. Data walks up to the ship's extended,
    curved ventilator. Data crawls into the wide ventilator
    opening.

    Moving along the raised deck, Mikey backs into something.
    He turns. A pirate stands there! His back to Mikey. The
    pirate is huddled over the ship's huge, wooden steering
    wheel. He is dressed in a tattered, colorful pirate
    costume. Mikey catches his breath. He reaches out, touching
    the pirate. A CREAK. The Pirate turns. Mikey is face to
    face with a grinning Pirate skull. Two daggers protruding
    from the deep eye sockets! Mikey SCREAMS. Everyone rushes
    to him. Save for Data. The kids examine the skeleton.

    Stef pulls one of the daggers from the eye socket.
    Examining it. The dagger's handle is lined with small
    sparkling jewels. Diamonds. Andy grabs the other dagger.
    Examining the jewels.
                                                              121.


                       ANDY
             Think these are real?

                       MIKEY
             If they are -- I'll make a necklace
             out of ’em for ya’.

    Andy gives Mikey a ruffle to his hair. He’d rather have
    another kiss. They are interrupted by Data’s voice.

    Screaming for help. Everyone turns. Data’s tiny legs
    protrude from the ventilator’s hole. Kicking. Data is
    stuck. The kids come to his rescue. Brand and Mouth each
    grab one of Data’s legs. Pulling. Hard. Instead of pulling
    Data out of the ventilator -- Brand and Mouth pull the
    ventilator out of the deck! Data falls on his bottom.

    Still inside of the ventilator. A large hole has replaced
    the ventilator. In the ship's deck. Andy peers into the
    dark hole. Her head pops back out. Nose crinkled. Coughing.
    It's dusty. Andy looks at the others.

                       ANDY
             Can't see anything --

    Andy motions for the others to follow. She lowers herself
    into the hole. Data has managed to squirm out of the
    ventilator. He follows the others into the bowels of the
    ship. Before entering, Mikey takes a shot from his breath
    alizer.


143 INT. PIRATE SHIP - BENEATH THE TOP DECK                          143

    The kids enter the large cabin below deck. A thick layer of
    greyish brown dust covers the floor. The kids huddle close
    together. The kids feet move through the thick dust.

    Mikey stops. Noticing something in the middle of the
    ceiling. A small yellow glow. Shining through the dust!
    Mikey points it out to the others.

                       MIKEY
             Cool. Yellow stuff.

    The kids clear the dust with their hands. The glowing gets
    brighter. Brighter. The dust is cleared. An area of boards
    is visible. Bright golden light glimmers. Through the
    cracks. The kids exchange hopeful glances. Mouth gives a
    sarcastic smirk.

                       MOUTH
             Great. We found Three Mile Island.
                                                              122.


    Mikey spots another riddle. Carved into the beams. Mouth
    translate*, in the voice of the British Pirate.

                       MOUTH
             "Ye Intruders Beware, Crushing
             death and grief, Soaked with blood,
             Of the trespassing thief."

                       DATA
             That’s the first riddle -- From the
             attic.

    Mikey excitedly stands on a bench. He grabs hold of a loose
    board. He pulls. Hard. The ship creaks and shudders.

    But the kids are too curious to care. Mikey continues to
    pull. Finally, the board snaps. A glaring shaft of light!
    Shining through the rectangular hole! Mikey smiles at the
    others. They are anxious. Excited.

    Everyone grabs hold of a board! As each board is removed,
    more light fills the cabin. The ship continues to creak and
    groan. The kids work fast. Urgent. Pulling away more
    boards. The ceiling above the kids begins to weaken. The
    small section of ceiling gives, tumbling down onto the
    kids, revealing the glorious light.


144 INT. TREASURE CABIN                                              144

    The kids have climbed into a large room. Filled with the
    treasure!

    A magical room. Glistening with all the colors of the
    rainbow. The room is literally a garden of jewels. There
    are trees with branches of silver and gold coins, and
    leaves of emeralds. Rose bushes are made of sparkling
    rubies. There are flowers of sapphires. Bushes made of
    pearls.

    There is even a half moon, suspended in the air, made of
    diamonds. Scattered throughout the jewel garden, are
    hundreds of other items. Drinking goblets. Necklaces.

    Rings. Crowns. More treasure than the kids (or the
    audience) has ever seen in one room! Pirate skeletons
    surround the treasure. Arms crossed. Armed with swords.
    Guardians of the treasure.

    And sitting in the middle of all of this, at a long wooden
    table covered with a feast of treasure, is One Eyed Willy.
    A look of total respect and admiration cover Mikey’s face.
    He nods to One Eyed Willy.
                                                       123.


                  MIKEY
        Hello. I'm Mike Walsh. These are my
        friends. You've been expecting us,
        and well, here we are -- we made
        it, Willy. All in one piece too --
        so far.

Mikey notices an ancient version of what could be taken for
a breathalizer sitting in front of One Eyed Willy. Mikey
smiles. Curious, Mikey reachs and lifts One Eyed Willy's
eye patch. There is no socket. It is a solid skull. Mikey
reverantly replaces the patch.

                  MIKEY
        One Eyed Willy -- You were the
        first Goonie.

The others are ecstatic! Joyous! Laughing and giggling
wildly! They make a mad scramble for the treasure. They
begin to load themselves with the pieces. Stuffing their
pockets, shirts, pants and socks. Andy and Stef try on
rings and necklaces. Data wears a huge golden crown. It
covers most of his head. Mouth begins to gather his
favorite pieces, he reaches over to the small pile of
jewels in front of One Eyed Willy. Mikey stops Mouth.

                  MIKEY
        That's his. Don't mess with it.

Mouth shrugs and grabs more jewels from the floor. Mikey
finds a large ruby.

                  MIKEY
        My Dad's gonna die when he sees
        what we brung him. He'll get ten
        hours sleep tonight!

                  BRAND
        Don't take anything you can't
        carry.
             (a beat)
        We'll come back for bigger stuff
        later.

Mike removes his marble bag. He empties all the marbles and
fills the bag with small, choice jewels.

                  STEF
        Hurry it up. Those creepos are
        still cornin' after us --

                  ANDY
        What're we gonna do?
                                                          124.


                  MIKEY
        I know -- The Hardy Boys did this
        once --

The kids listen. Continuing to stuff themselves with
treasure. Their clothes bulge. Tight. Like they’re wearing
fat suits. Mikey continues.

                  MIKEY
        We can leave a trail of this stuff
        -- Leadin' to one a' those --
        skeleton caves -- While they follow
        the trail -- We'll be hidin' out in
        another cave! We'll take 'em out!
        Then we can make a run for it!

                  MAMA (O.S.)
        That's a good plan. Real good plan.

The kids turn. Mama, Jake and Francis stand in the cabin.
Jake and Francis are armed with swords and knives from the
weapon rack. Mama points her gun at the kids. Laughing.

The kids look at each other. Frightened. Suddenly, Data
fumes with anger. He cries out.

                  DATA
        That's if -- This is war! We will
        not be taken alive!!!
             (opens his shirt, pulls a
             cord and screams)
        "intimidator!"

Data’s arms, legs and crotch begin to expand, giving him
enormous muscles! Lifts in his shoes cause Data's height to
expand! Data begins to look -- Intimidating! But his
muscles continue to grow. Getting bigger -- Bigger --
Bigger -- Until suddenly -- Boom! They explode! But Data is
undaunted! He screams.

                  DATA
        Optional Bully buster!
                                                              125.


    Data opens his coat and pulls another cord! Several rows of
    flash cubes are attached to Data's coat! They begin to
    flash! First they are effective, but soon fizzle out
    because of Data’s contact with the water! Data's eyes are
    raging! He begins to pull every cord on his body! One by
    one, each of his home made devices is tripped. But alas, as
    always, they don't work! Green smoke, meant to be used as a
    smoke screen, slowly billows out of Data's clothing. GI JOE
    toys pop out of his shirt and pockets, firing plastic
    projectiles that only travel a few inches before hitting
    the floor. Countless ball bearings shoot out of his pant
    leg and cuff. There are bottle rockets, sparklers,
    firecrackers -- Everything shoots from Data's body! But
    nothing works! Data’s body is a literal explosion of junk!

    The Fratellis watch, both amazed and amused by what is
    going on.

                       JAKE
             This kid’s better than Fourth of
             July in Asbury Bark!

    Finally, Data hits the "Out” button on his belt buckle.

    The belt buckle flips open! The suction cup projectile
    shoots forward! It attaches itself to Mama’s gun! Data hits
    the "IN" switch on his belt, trying to reel in the gun. But
    Mama holds tight! The powerful ‘suction cup pulls Data
    toward Mama! Data stares in shock as he and Mama collide!
    This causes an electrical shock which sends the two of them
    flying across the room! Mama also drops her gun! Data gets
    to his feet. He and the frightened goonies run out of the
    room! Jake and Francis revive Mama and follow! In hot
    pursuit!


145 INT. TOP DECK                                                    145

    The kids run across the top deck. The Fratellis are right
    behind them! Bigger! Faster! They manage to tackle the
    kids! They surround the goonies. Swords pointed at the kids
    throats. Mama glares at the kids.

                       MAMA
             Up! Up on yer feet!

    The kids stand.

                       MAMA
             Now go on!!! Empty out all those
             goodies from downstairs! Move it!
                                                           126.


    The kids lift their shirts and begin to empty the jewels
    onto the deck. Rubies, diamonds, emeralds roll out onto the
    deck. Mama stares at the treasure. Her eyes fill with
    greed. Then Mama goes over to Mouth. She looks at him as if
    something was not quite right with him.

                       MAMA
             You got awful quiet all of a
             sudden.

    Mouth just smiles, keeping his mouth closed.

                       MAMA
             C’mon chum -- open your yap!!

    Mouth reluctantly opens his mouth and a truckload of gems
    spill out. Not satisfied, Mama sees something on Mouth’s
    tongue, reaches in and pulls out about three feet of beaded
    pearls.


146 INT. PIRATE SHIP - TOP DECK                                   146

    The goonies are tied up. They stand in line, at the edge of
    the deck. Mama walks to a wooden plank. Built onto the
    ship's edge. She turns and looks at the kids.

                       MAMA
             Ya' wanna play Pirate?.
                  (sadistic smile)
             We'll play Pirate.

    Mama pushes out the plank. A long thick board. It extends
    far over the edge of the ship. It overlooks the deepest
    section of water. Mama walks back to the kids. She paces in
    front of the kids. She looks them over, deciding who's
    first! Mama looks at Andy. Andy gives a hard kick to Mama's
    shins. Mama doubles over. Andy snaps.

                       ANDY
             You gross old witch!

    Mama looks up. Eyes glowing with rage. She moves the tip of
    her sword to Andy's throat. Mama growls.

                       MAMA
             Move it, sweetie.
                                                              127.


    Andy steps out. Mama pokes her with the sword. Andy walks
    to the plank. The kids watch. Horrified. Andy steps onto
    the plank. Mama stays behind. Jabbing Andy with the sword.
    Andy begins to walk the plank. The other kids watch.
    Helpless. Mikey's eyes fill with tears. Andy continues to
    walk. Only a few feet from the end of the board. She looks
    down. The deep water sparkles below.

    Andy gives a frightened gulp. Mama,is a few feet behind
    her. Resembling" an old pirate witch. Mama gives a mad
    cackle.

                       MAMA
             Hold your breath, sweetie.

    Mama jabs Andy. Andy falls off the plank. She hits the
    water! A loud splash! Brand cries out!

                       BRAND
             No!!!

    Brand dashes forward. Out of line.

                       MIKEY
             Brand!

    Before the Fratelli brothers can stop -- Brand leaps over
    the side of the ship! We hear a splash! Brand sinks. Under
    the deep water. Mikey hides his eyes. Scared. Trembling.
    Mama turns to the kids. She gives a vicious smile.

                       MAMA
             Two down. Who's next.


147 INT. UNDERWATER                                                  147

    Andy sinks to the bottom of the deep pool. Hands tied
    behind her back. Andy holds her breath. Cheeks puffed with
    air. Brand floats downward. A few feet above Andy.

    He struggles with the rope binding his hands. With a few
    twists of his wrists, Brand’s hands come free. He swims
    toward Andy. He grabs Andy. Her eyes are wavering. Nearly
    unconscious. Brand puts his arm around Andy.

    Holding tight. He swims upward. Using all of his strength!
    Brand swims toward the surface and pulls Andy onto a rock
    next to the ship.


148 EXT. ROCK NEXT TO PIRATE SHIP                                    148
                                                            128.


    Brand leans over the unconscious Andy. Giving her mouth to
    mouth. Andy suddenly wakes. She sits up. Coughing. Brand
    holds her. Comforting her. She composes herself. Giving a
    puzzled look to Brand.

                       ANDY
             Where am -- Oh --
                  (suddenly remembers)
             You jumped in? To save me?

    Brand gives a modest nod. Andy throws her arms around
    Brand. Planting a long, hard kiss on his lips. A few
    moments gass. Andy breaks the kiss. She withdraws her lips.
    A puzzled expression covers her face. She reaches into
    Brand’s mouth and seem to be feeling for something.

    Puzzled, she withdraws her fingers, looking at Brand.

                       ANDY
             What happened to your braces --

                       BRAND
             I don't wear braces -- Mikey wears
             --

    She suddenly understands.

    They both stop and look at each other.

                        ANDY
             Oh God!

                                                        CUT TO:


149 INT. TOP DECK                                                  149

    Mouth and Stef have been tied together. Back to Back. They
    are walking the plank. A few inches from the end. Mama
    stands behind them, jabbing them with the sword. Edging
    them forward. Stef looks back to Mouth. An honest, serious
    expression in her eyes.

                       STEF
             How long can you hold your breath?

                        MOUTH
             An hour.

                       STEF
             Be serious now!!!

                        MOUTH
                                                         129.


        Actually -- About ten seconds. You
        were always Champion of that
        underwater stuff.

                  STEF
        Clarke? -- When you run out of air,
        just turn your face to me and I'11
        share whatever I’ve got left.

Mouth looks at Stef, he is so touched by this, he cannot
speak for the first time in his life.

Mama jabs Mouth and Stef. They go off the edge. Suddenly, a
loud pirate scream pierces the air! Everyone turns. To the
direction of the scream.

SLOTH

Swings down from the ship’s mast. He is dressed in bright
Pirate clothing. A sword is strapped to his waist. Sloth
emits another loud scream. Before Mouth and Stef hit the
water. Sloth scoops them up! Saving their lives! Carrying
Mouth and Stef under his arm, Sloth swings back onto the
deck. He safely places Mouth and Stef beside the other
kids. Sloth turns to Mama and the boys. Sloth growls. He
flexes his muscles. His shirt begins to rip. Tear. Muscles
bulging.

For the first time, we see that Sloth has an incredible,
muscular body! He has transformed from a grotesque creature
into a virtual superhero! Stef stares at Sloth. Awestruck.

                  STEF
        Hunk city!

With everyone’s attention focused on Sloth, Chunk sneakily
climbs over the ship’s side. His torn and tattered clothes
have now taken on the appearance of a Pirate costume. Chunk
sneaks up behind the kids. They are shocked to see him.

                   BRAND
        Chunk?!?

                  CHUNK
        "Captain” Chunk!

Chunk begins to untie the kids' hands. Meanwhile, Mama
points to Sloth. She snaps at Francis and Jake.

                   MAMA
        Get him!
                                                        130.


The two come at Sloth. Their swords are extended. Ready for
a fight.

Francis swings his sword at Sloth. Sloth ducks. He picks up
Francis, lifting him above his head.

Sloth throws his brother through the air. Francis flies
inside of the ship's figurehead! Francis head breaks
through the woman figure's head. This creates a bizarre
image: The shapely body of the figurehead, adorned with the
head of the unconscious Francis.

Chunk still unties the kids. Mikey works with him. Speeding
up the process.

Sloth continues his swordfight with Jake. Sloth fights like
the expert Pirates he's seen on TV.

                  DATA
        Pinchers of Peril!!!

Data fires his clapping teeth. The teeth clamp down on
Jake's crotch, doubling him over! Sloth grabs the sword
from Jake's hand and breaks it in two. Sloth throws a hard
punch to Jake's jaw! The powerful punch sends Jake flying
across the deck floor! He skids into a pyramid of
cannonballs! Konk! He's out cold!

Chunk has untied all of the kids! They run to the side of
the ship!

Beneath them, Andy and Brand wade in the water. Brand
shouts to his friends.

                  BRAND
        C' mon! Jump!

The kids jump over the side, into the water!

Meanwhile, Mama finds herself face to face with Sloth.
Sloth growls at her. Mama holds her sword. Trying to reason
with Sloth.

                  MAMA
        Okay -- So maybe I treated ya’ bad
        -- Keepin' ya' locked in that room
        -- It was for your own good.

Sloth gives a louder growl. He walks toward Mama, ready to
attack. Mama pleads. Frightened.

                  MAMA
                                                           131.


             I ain’t always been bad to ya’ --
             Don’t ya’ remember? When you were a
             little one? I’d sing ya' to sleep?.

    Sloth grabs the sword from Mama. He throws it overboard. He
    picks up Mama in his arms -- ready to throw, her overboard.
    She begins to sing.

                       MAMA
             "Rockabye baby, in the treetop --
             When the wind blows, the cradle
             will rock -- "

    He pauses. Listening. The song is warm, comforting. It
    brings a pleasant smile to his face. He begins to gently
    rock Mama in his arms. She continues to sing.

                       MAMA
             "When' the bow breaks, the cradle
             will fall --"

    Sloth smiles. He drops mama overboard! As she falls, Sloth
    sings the final verse.

                       SLOTH
             "-- and down will come baby, cradle
             and all!"

    Mama hits the water! Meanwhile, the kids are all in the
    water. They have begun their escape, swimming to the shore.
    Sloth jumps into the water. He swings toward the kids. When
    Sloth makes it to the kids, Chunk introduces him.

                       CHUNK
             Guys -- This is Sloth. He's just
             like us. A reject.

    ABOARD THE PIRATE SHIP

    Mama climbs back onto the deck. Soaking wet. She sees the
    kids swimming away. Her eyes are angry, frustrated. But
    their is something more importang on her mind. She runs to
    Jake. He still lies beside the cannonball pile. Dazed. Mama
    slaps him. He stirs.

                       MAMA
             Wake up! Get Francis! Let’s go get
             the rest of the goods!


150 INT. TREASURE CABIN                                           150
                                                           132.


    Mama, Jake and Francis enter. They greedily begin to stuff
    their pockets with the treasure.

    Mama walks to where One Eyed Willy is seated. She reaches
    for the pile of treasure in front of One Eye Willy. Mama
    grabs the pile. But it is attached to a long, metal chain!
    Mama pulls hard on the chain! This begins another of One
    Eyed Willy's chain reaction booby traps. One Eyed Willy's
    skeleton shoots upward, toward the ceiling! A trap door in
    the ceiling opens! Mama and the boys watch in shock!


151 INT. TOP DECK                                                 151

    One Eyed Willy's skeleton flies through the trap door on
    the Captain's deck. He lands directly in front of the
    ship's steering wheel. In rtibe goldberg fashion, the trap
    door hits a cannonball, which rolls along a path in the
    ship's deck, which is connected to a long section of wood
    that stretches to the cavern ceiling, the wood is connected
    to the ceiling's support system. The cannonball hits the
    section of wood, causing the wood to snap, causing the
    entire support system to become undone.

    The entire cavern begins to shudder. Rumble. The Pirate
    ship tilts. Shakes. The sails buckle. The ship's anchors
    raise.

    THE GOONIES and Sloth have waded to the shore. They quickly
    haul out of the boat. Dashing to the cavern entrance.

    The entire cavern begins to shake. Like an earthquake, The
    ground begins to break. Opening. The walls begin to crack.
    Crumble. Pieces of rock begin to fall. Crashing to the
    ground.

    MAMA AND THE BOYS have run onto the top of the tilting ship
    deck! Running for their lives. But they tumble and roll
    across the deck. They fall off the trembling ship. Into the
    water!

    THE GOONIES arrive at the Cavern entrance. Boulders and
    earth fall in front of the entrance. Causing it to
    collapse. Sloth moves forward. Not unlike Sampson, Sloth
    holds out his mighty arms. He grabs each side of the
    cavern,walls.

    Holding them in place. He supports the crumbling ceiling
    with his strong back. This keeps the passageway open.
                                                           133.


    Sloth motions for the kids to hurry inside. The kids crawl
    through his legs. Out of the cavern! Rocks and boulders
    fall all around Sloth. But he doesn’t budge. Doesn’t
    flinch.

    AL1 of the kids have crawled to safety. Chunk is the last
    to join them. Sloth turns. Ready to join the kids. But
    something catches his eye. He sees Mama and his brothers.

    In the water. Struggling for their lives. Chunk holds out
    his hand to Sloth.

                       CHUNK
             Sloth! C’mon! Take my hand!

    Sloth shakes his head. He turns and gives an innocent hiss
    to Chunk’s cheek. Sloth releases his grip on the walls and
    ceiling. He steps back out into the cavern. Chunk cries
    out.

                       CHUNK
             Sloth! No!

    An avalanche of falling earth seals the cavern entrance!
    Forming a permanent wall between Chunk and Sloth!


152 INT. PIRATE SHIP CAVERN                                       152

    The entire cavern is being devastated. The sails fill with
    wind. The Pirate ship begins to move, with One Eyed Willy
    at the wheel.

    Sloth swims to Mama and the boys. He wraps his enormous
    arms around them. Saving their lives! They look up seeing
    the Pirate ship shaking in front of them.


153 INT. ESCAPE TUNNEL                                            153

    The Goonies are trapped in a dark, rumbling, shaking
    passageway. Both sides of the passageway have begun to cave
    in! Closing in on the trapped Goonies! Brand screams.

                       BRAND
             Data! We need one a' your lights!!!

    Data FUMBLES in his backpack for a light. He reaches back
    for the last ROAD FLARE. But, unbeknownst to Data, he
    hasn't GRABBED a road flare -- it’s the stick of DYNAMITE!
                                                             134.


    Data LIGHTS the stick! It SPARKS, illuminating the
    passageway! The goonies LOOK AROUND! They see the CRUMBLING
    DIRT COMING AT THEM FROM BOTH SIDES! There, is NO WAY OUT!
    Suddenly, Data NOTICES something strange about the flare --

                       DATA
             Hey -- this isn’t a road flare --
             it's -- it’s --
                  (total shock)
             DYNAMITE!!!

    The KIDS TURN AND RUN!! Data runs in circles, trying to
    find a place for the SPARKING DYNAMITE! He SEES A CRACK IN
    THE WALL, emitting a SMALL AMOUNT OF LIGHT! Data INSERTS
    the dynamite INTO THE CRACK! Data RUNS to his friend! They
    CLUSTER TOGETHER! Ears PLUGGED! Eyes CLOSED!

    BOOM!!! The dynamite ROCKS the already quivering
    passageway! A few moments pass. The kids OPEN their eyes
    through the SMOKE! The dynamite has BLOWN A LARGE HOLE INTO
    THE WALL! An OPENING! LEADING to the outside world! The
    EXCITED Goonies RUN toward the hole! They EXIT, SECONDS
    BEFORE the passageway COLLAPSES!


154 EXT. ESCAPE TUNNEL - DAWN                                       154

    The goonies STAND in a small, rocky ALCOVE. The stretch of
    OCEAN is in front of them.

    The heavy RUMBLING becomes a muffled echo in the
    background. One Eyed Willy's caverns and passageways are
    being SEALED FOREVER! The GOONIES pause to breathe in the
    fresh sea air!

    Their bodies are scratched and BRUISED covered with MUD and
    DIRT. Their clothes are in TATTERS, hanging like RAGS. They
    have gone through a visual TRANSFORMATION from Goon kids to
    COURAGEOUS ADVENTURERS.


155 EXT. BEACH - DAY                                                155

    A NATIONAL PARK RANGER slams on his DUNE BUGGY brakes,
    squints curiously into the distance, now raises his
    binoculars to get a better look. His jaw drops as he
    reaches for his radio.

                       RANGER
                  (into radio)
                                                           135.


             Harvey? Get the Sheriff on the horn
             -- I think I just found that bunch
             of Goober's he's been looking for -
             -


156 EXT. RANGER STATION AND BEACH - DAY                           156

    The Ranger Station parking lot is PACKED. SHERIFF’S CARS.
    AMBULANCES. LOCAL PRESS. PARENTS and ONLOOKERS. The Goonies
    emerge from the Ranger Station as the Crowd CHEERS and the
    PARENTS rush forward to meet their kids.

    CLOSER ANGLE

    IRENE rushes up to Mikey and Brand. MR. WALSH and ROSALITA
    can be seen farther back in the Crowd. Mikey looks at up at
    Irene with embarrassed eyes.

                       MIKEY
             Hi, mom. Guess we’re dead meat,
             huh?

    Irene can’t hide her smile, or the happy tears in her eyes.
    She WRAPS HER ARMS around Mikey and Brand, embracing them
    tightly.

    ANOTHER ANGLE

    CHUNK runs to an obese MAN and WOMAN. His PARENTS. The man
    is dressed exactlt like CHUNK. Hawaiian shirt. Plaid
    Bermuda shorts. Black knee socks. The WOMAN wears a
    FLOWERED DRESS, holds a CARDBOARD BOX COVERED WITH TIN
    FOIL. Chunk embraces his parents.

                       MOM
             Lawrence! We were so worried!
                  (holds out proudly)
             Here, darling -- I wrapped supper
             for you. It’s your favorite --

    MOM gives the foiled-wrapped CARTON to Chunk. He grabs it
    excitedly, rips the foil away -- HOT DOGS! LOADED WITH
    EVERYTHING!

    CAMERA PANS TO:

    MOUTH and STEF. Mouth LOOKS at Stef. A SERIOUS, HONEST look
    on his face. He SPEAKS IN HIS OWN VOICE.

                       MOUTH
                                                          136.


        Just wanted to say -- well, thanks.
        Ya’ know -- for savin’ me and all.
        I really appreciated it.

                  STEF
             (shocked)
        Wow!-- a real moment. You know,
        your voice is nice, when you’re not
        using your mouth.

                  MOUTH
        You know -- your face is pretty,
        when you blur your eyes.

CAMERA PANS TO ANDY AND MIKEY

WATCHING. SMILING. Andy turns to Mikey, a warm smile on her
face.

                  ANDY
        Mikey -- you just   keep kissin'
        girls the way you   do -- and the
        parts a’ you that   don’t work so
        good -- are gonna   catch up with the
        parts that do!

BRAND walks up. He puts his arm around Andy. They walk away
together. CAMERA FOLLOWING. Brand gives Andy an impressed
look.

                  BRAND
        Lifetime Goonie?

                  ANDY
        You bet your sweet ass.

She GRABS Brand and kisses him. Mikey stands a few feet
away WATCHING. ALONE. JEALOUS. He begins to COUGH. He
removes his PRIMOTENE MIST. Ready to take a shot. He
pauses, looks at the breathalizer, then tosses it on the
ground. WHO NEEDS IT?

Through the Crowd, Mr. Walsh has noticed, smiles proudly.

Suddenly, everyone is INTERRUPTED. A group of POLICEMEN
rush to the shore!

ANGLE ON SLOTH

SLOTH walks out of the ocean! DRAGGING the waterlogged
MAMA, JAKE, and FRANCIS. The POLICE quickly take Mama and
the boys into custody. Chunk’s EYES LIGHT UP, seeing Sloth.
He runs to him, holding out his carton of hot dogs.
                                                          137.


                  CHUNK
        Sloth! Sloth!

Sloth gives a happy GRUNT, glad to see his friend. He picks
up Chunk, who offers him the carton.

                  CHUNK
        Look! Hot dogs!

                  SLOTH
             (singing happily with
             instant recognition)
        Hot dogs, Armour hot dogs --

Sloth devours a giant hot dog in a single gulp as Chunk’s
PARENTS watch in HORRIFIED AWE.

                  CHUNK
             (shyly)
        He’s my new best friend -- and Dad?
        If they take away our house and we
        have to move to New York -- I
        thought maybe we could adopt him --
        get him a job with the New York
        Jets -- or with the Rangers as Head
        Goalie --

Sloth destroys another hot dog, BELCHES VOLCANICALLY as
Chunk’s Parents exchange a PARALYZED LOOK.

ANOTHER ANGLE

Mama and the Boys are HANDCUFFED, then put into the back of
a FOLICE VAN. CAMERA PANS AS:

MR. PERKINS and TROY suddenly pull up in a white Cadillac
convertible, screech to a stop! They get out quickly,
approaching Mr. Walsh, who stands at the edge of the crowd
with Mikey. Mr. Perkins advances aggressively, waving a
piece of paper.

                  PERKINS
        Today’s the day, Walsh, so let’s
        get this over with! Your house is
        blocking the start of our new first
        fairway, so I've decided to begin
        the demolition with you --

                  WALSH
        If -- if you could just hold off
        for a bit, Mr. Perkins -- maybe --
        maybe I could find --
                                                        138.


                  TROY
        Oh, come on, old man. My daddy
        doesn’t have all day! There’s fifty
        more houses to destroy after yours!

                  PERKINS
             (yelling off)
        Sheriff! You come on over here and
        witness this --

Mr. Walsh nervously takes out HIS Primotene Mist, then
looks down at Mikey who stares back up, tears in his eyes.

                  MIKEY
        I’m sorry, Dad -- we had our hands
        on the future, but --
             (his lower lip starts to
             quiver)
        We blew it -- we threw it all away
        to save out lives.

Mr. Walsh fights to hold back a tear.

                  WALSH
        You and Brand are back. Safe. With
        your mother and me --
             (grits his teeth, THROWS
             AWAY the Primotene Mist)
        That makes us the richest people in
        Cauldron Point.

                  PERKINS
        Walsh?

They turn. Mr. Perkins grins cruelly.

                  PERKINS
        You’re looking at the richest
        people in Cauldron Point. Now sign
        it.

Troy props the paper up against his father’s hack for
signature, whips out a pen with a sickening smile.

                  TROY
        Here. Use my pen. I'11 even let you
        keep it as a souvenir.

Mr. Walsh tries to steady himself, trembling, looks off:

ANGLE ON GOONIE CROWD
                                                         139.


The CROWD is hushed as the rest of the GOONIES and their
PARENTS turn to watch helplessly.

BACK TO SCENE

Mr. Walsh slwoly takes the pen from Troy, lifts an unsteady
arm, stares at the paper, eyes misting over. He STARTS TO
SIGN as the Sheriff takes a sympathetic step forward,
stopping him.

                  SHERIFF
        Now listen up, Mr. Perkins. Maybe
        this isn’t the proper time or place
        to --

                  PERKINS
        I’m not interested in your ethical
        opinions, Sheriff,. Just your
        signature as a witness. If you’d
        been doing your duty, if you’d been
        on the ball -- you’d have found my
        son’s car by now, isn’t that right?

                  SHERIFF
             (spits in disgust)
        Oh, hell --
             (suddenly looks off)
        I already found your son’s damn car
        --

                  TROY
             (ecited)
        You did? Where is it?

                  SHERIFF
             (pointing)
        Just about to run you over, Troy --

Mr. Walsh grits his teeth, oblivious to everything. He
begins to SIGN as Perkins TURNS, and the signature is
written ACROSS THE BACK OF HIS JACKET!

ANGLE ON GORILLAS AND RED MUSTANG - THEIR POV

The RED MUSTANG careens into the parking lot at high speed,
the GORILLAS behind the wheel! It heads straight for the
CROWD, spinning out at the last second, squealing sideways,
CRASHING INTO THE SIDE OF MR. PERKINS’ WHITE CADILLAC!

                  TROY
        Daddy! Your new car!!
                                                       140.


The Gorillas SCREAM back at Troy with equal excitment,
covering their eyes. Bonzo whips the car into reverse,
roars off through the Crowd as BYSTANDERS DIVE FOR SAFETY!

ANGLE ON CROWD

One entire side of the white Cadillac is caved in! The
stunned CROWD suddenly bursts into CHERRING, APPLAUSE, AND
LAUGHTER!

                  PERKINS
             (purple with rage)
        Don't you people laugh at me! No
        one ever laughs at me!

The LAUGHTER grows LOUDER! Even Mr. Walsh and Mikey start
to join in.

ANGLE ON EDGE OF CROWD

Sloth watches from the rear edge of the Crowd. To one side
of him is Chunk. To the other, ROSALITA. They all laugh
heartily with everyone else as SUDDENLY:

SLOTH'S EXPRESSION BEGINS TO CHANGE!

His eyes ROLL. He begins to COUGH, feeling CURIOUS
RUMBLINGS in his stomach. The Crowd's laughter continues as
he POUNDS himself in the chest, trying to clear his massive
airways as:

A GLEAMING OBJECT EJECTS ITSELF FROM HIS MOUTH!!

ANGLE ON ROSALITA

The OBJECT hits the ground at Rosalita's FEET. She looks
down curiously, then picks it up, EYES WIDENING with
surprise.

IT IS A HUGE, SPARKLING DIAMOND!

BACK TO SLOTH

Sloth is DOUBLED OVER now, INNER EXPLOSIONS wracking his
huge body. A concerned CHUNK rushes over to him.

                  CHUNK
        Sloth! Sloth --
             (trying to yell over
             Crowd's laughter)
        Somebody get a giant Bromo, quick!
                                                          141.


Sloth straightens up, looks at his friend, then GRINS, his
mouth falling open:

IT IS FILLED WITH JEWELS FROM THE PIRATE SHIP!!

BACK TO ROSALITA

SEEING. REALIZING. Holding the diamond up high, she starts
to make her way through the boisterous CROWD.

BACK TO PERKINS

The furious Perkins SLAMS the PAPER down on what’s left of
the hood of his car, turns on Mr. Walsh. The Crowd’s
LAUGHTER is beginning to subside.

                     PERKINS
           Had your fun, Walsh? Well, that’s
           okay. I’ve got the rest of my life
           to laugh at you --

Troy holds out the pen. The Crowd QUIETS as Mr. Walsh
exchanges a sad look with Mikey, then takes it, reluctantly
leans over the hood of the car.

ANGLE ON DATA

DATA stands with his PARENTS, his eyes glassed over. He
looks off at MOUTH who stands with STEF nearby.

                     DATA
                (a whisper)
           I sure am gonna miss bein’ a Goonie
           --

TO SCENE

A HEAVY SIGH, Mr. Walsh starts to put pen to paper in as:

                     ROSALITA'S VOICE
                (from middle of crowd, in
                Spanish)
           Wait! Don’t sign!

Walsh looks up, momentarily pausing, then leans over the
hood again, ignoring ROSALITA'S VOICE as the Crowd MUMBLES
curiously.

                     ROSALITA’S VOICE
                (in Spanish)
           Don’t sign! Don’t sign!

BACK TO MOUTH AND STEF
                                                          142.


                  STEF
             (turns curiously)
        You speak Spanish. What’s she
        saying?

                  MOUTH
        Don’t --
             (thinking)
        Don’t sit down -- no -- don't shoot
        -- don’t throw up -- don’t --
             (SUDDENLY REALIZING)
        DON’T SIGN!!

BACK TO WALSH

MR. WALSH HAS BEGUN TO WRITE HIS SIGNATURE AS:

Mouth and Stef rush up! Mikey rushes up! Rosalita rushes
up!

                  EVERYONE
        DON’T SIGN!

Mikey GRABS the piece of paper, pulling Mr. Walsh’s PEN
ACROSS IT IN A STRAIGHT LINE!

Perkins and Troy stare unbelievingly as Rosalita holds up
the DIAMOND to a dumbfounded Mr. Walsh and:

                  CHUNK’S VOICE
        Hey, Goonies! LOOK!!

ANGLE ON CHUNK

As EVERYONE TURNS. Chunk raises his CUPPED HANDS, now opens
them:

CLOSE ON CHUNK'S HANDS

FILLED WITH GEMSTONES! Sparkling DIAMONDS! Glorious.
RUBIES! Bright EMERALDS!

BACK TO SCENE

Sloth BELCHES. THREE MORE JEWELS are ejected from his
mouth!

The CROWD CHEERS as the GOONIES rush to Sloth, swarming
over him like mountain climbers, JEWELS erupting from his
mouth as they pummel him like a huge vending machine.

SEVERAL REPORTERS rush up SNAPPING PICTURES, peppering the
Goonies with questions.
                                                          143.


                    SHERIFF
               (newly arrived, at Chunk)
          Tellin' more stories, Lawrence?

                    CHUNK
          Wait -- this time I’m tellin' the
          truth, Sheriff, honest!

The Sheriff smiles patronizingly, turns, starts to walk
away.

HE SEES SOMETHING IN THE DISTANCE, STOPS, THUNDERSTRUCK!!

                    SHERIFF
          Holy Mary Mother of God --
               (jaw drops)
          LOOK!!

EVERYONE turns to look with AUDIBLE GASPS, as WE SEE:

ANGLE ON PIRATE SHIP - THEIR POV

THE PIRATE SHIP, SAILING across the ocean. A MAGICAL SIGHT.
CAMERA PANS the faces of everyone on shore. POLICEMEN. THE
SHERIFF. SLOTH. IRENE. MR. WALSH. THE GOONIES. Staring in
AWE.

ANGLE ON MIKEY

THE BACK OF MIKEY’S HEAD. He turns slowly to face the
AUDIENCE, WEARING THE BLACK PATCH OF ONE EYED WILLY.

MIKEY WINKS at all of us with a warm smile.

BACK TO PIRATE SHIP

Farther away in the distance now. A GRACEFUL, ROMANTIC DOT
against the beautiful horizon AS WE:

                                                  FADE OUT:

THE END
